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Heroes Community > Other Side of the Monitor > Thread: About pain
Thread: About pain This thread is 2 pages long: 1 2 · NEXT»
Elvin
Elvin


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
posted June 28, 2007 04:34 PM
Edited by Elvin at 16:36, 28 Jun 2007.

About pain

Action and reaction have a tendency of coming in pairs. You mess with something, it's probably going to mess with you In much the same way pain is a reaction to a harmful source, or even better a warning. Your nervous system alerts your brain that whatever you are doing is having a bad effect on your body, that you are endangering it. It is trying to protect you and trigger thoughts on ending the painful situation but also learning to avoid it should you encounter it again.


But pain does not assault the body alone. There is pain that cuts into your soul even when you are physically unharmed and it can hurt you a lot more while being harder to drive away. Each and every one of us carries guilt, fear, anger and these hurt inside even if it does not show and they come back to haunt us in a moment’s notice.


Either way you will experience it and in time may see through the pain.
One thing you will realize is that it is inevitable, no matter what path you take you will find it ahead so you must arm yourself with resilience and endurance so as to be better prepared. Also you will see that despite its sting there are certain things you need to fight for because if you don’t, you resign yourself to an inferior existence that may hurt you more in the end. Just as it can break you it can give you passion, determination and a hardened character to face your trials – it is one of the things that make us who we are and it is only when we become aware that our life can be threatened that we can begin to understand its value.


Some people know nothing of it and wallow in self pity because ‘people do not understand their fragile personalities’ or they once faced rejection or whatever. Pain is to lose your wife when she was pregnant, when you are abandoned by the people you love, when your body is wrecked because of an absent minded driver…Thank goodness I have never experienced something as terrible and hope I never will but I see it around me nonetheless while some whine for seemingly no reason while living pretty a pretty comfortable life in fact.


Pain has yet another property: It tests you if you can move on and continue your life or you will stand there b*tching around about why things are not easier. And that is an obvious sign of what a person is made of and if you can rely on him for what is to come. That said I cannot but sympathize with those that have real problems, some are too hard to stand up against and sometimes they come in swarms…Sometimes you just can’t help it.
’Enos kakou myria epontai’.


I do not consider pain a good thing in its own - it may eventually  have a beneficial effect though that depends on you - but rather something that we must accept, come to terms with and move on. It’s how you will deal with it that is of paramount importance.
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Elvin
Elvin


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
posted June 28, 2007 10:11 PM

To get things rolling I'd be interested to know where you look for relief when something bad happens. While some issues stop affecting you the moment you deal with them there are some that stay with you for a while and leave you restless.

As Kookastar mentioned we can seek a special place that makes us feel better. Some of my alternatives are listening a calm song, going for some hoops alone, visiting a close friend. I don't know it just depends on my mood or if I want to see anyone.

What works for you? Waiting on comments
In case it crossed your mind - no I'm not an emo
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baklava
baklava


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
posted June 29, 2007 01:31 PM

Quote:
when your body is wrecked because of an absent minded driver

Haha, I actually survived that part Here's what helped me through 5 months of inability to move my arms or legs:

Marilyn Manson usually puts out the pain. Led Zeppelin can do the trick too. AC/DC is good when you want something to cheer you up. The Doors have similar effect to Marilyn Manson... All in all, music. Different bands have different effects on different people.
And talking to my best friends, they always manage to calm me down and make me feel better.
If that doesn't work either, watching a few episodes of South Park helps definitely.
Basically, physical pain is just an information. It's mind pain that's screwed up. When the car hit me, I was like "well this sucks... but I'll get better"; while I spent an entire week in complete depression when some a$$hole dumped a little kitty in a dumpster, I brought it home and it died. Similar to people dying, too. But hey, that's what people do; they die. There's no real cure for THAT kind of pain; you can just face it and it'll pass in time.
____________
"Let me tell you what the blues
is. When you ain't got no
money,
you got the blues."
Howlin Wolf

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Daystar
Daystar


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Back from the Dead
posted June 29, 2007 01:43 PM

I general come here, or listen to music like Baklava said.   Although I would not say Led Zeplin or AC/DC, because that's Faith music and it drives me crazy.  I generaly recomend showtunes, and anything written by Joss Whedon.

Also, cookies, icecream, pbj, and cat purring (not at the same time) all help.
____________
How exactly is luck a skill?

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baklava
baklava


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
posted June 29, 2007 01:46 PM

Quote:
Although I would not say Led Zeplin or AC/DC, because that's Faith music and it drives me crazy.

...Faith music?
____________
"Let me tell you what the blues
is. When you ain't got no
money,
you got the blues."
Howlin Wolf

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Daystar
Daystar


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Back from the Dead
posted June 30, 2007 01:01 AM

Music as listened to by Faith the Vampire Slayer?  Evil sadistic super snow?  Anyway, she listened to that kind of music, and it drove me crazy...
____________
How exactly is luck a skill?

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Elvin
Elvin


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
posted June 30, 2007 01:13 AM

Haha I liked her to be frank. She was a bit messed up to be sure but she wasn't that bad. And she did have some charisma
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Daystar
Daystar


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Back from the Dead
posted June 30, 2007 01:34 AM

Yeah, and funny.  
"New watcher?"
"Yeah"
"Screw that" [walks off]
"...Now why didn't I just say that?"
____________
How exactly is luck a skill?

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Nidhgrin
Nidhgrin


Honorable
Famous Hero
baking cookies from stardust
posted July 06, 2007 09:44 PM

Interesting thread!  I don't respond well to physical pain.  Generally I get whiny, moody or cranky, and don't want to be helped  Different from several years ago I go see a doctor sooner though, and have less objections against taking medication if necessary.

I'm very upbeat most of the time, even though I could fill a couple of pages talking about loss.  When something bad happens, it usually goes very deep, very fast.  Sort of like I immediately make time to chew on it, look at it from every different angle, and try to learn as much from it as I can.  I suppose this makes me hurt more, but it lasts only days, weeks at its worst.  Then after a while I feel the need to talk about how I picture or frame what happened.  Like bouncing off some random thoughts on friends and family.  After that I carry on with my life, and the pain slowly fades away.

There are only a few things that happened in the past, that can still upset me when something reminds me of them today.  But only lightly, and for the moment of the memory returning.  Guess my way of processing grief works very well for me, though it must be painful for friends to see me seal off like that for a while.

When I hurt, walking along the shoreline of the beach, against the wind and preferably at night, is the best thing I can do.  Lying down in the cool sand of the dunes also works, though I guess every form of connecting with nature in solitude would do.

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Elvin
Elvin


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
posted July 06, 2007 10:45 PM

You like your privacy then Yes I occasionally feel that going to a quiet place alone can help. And I love the relaxing atmoshere of the sea. I'll think about it a bit and then just stop focusing on it, it's no use. Some things are better not to dwell on, after all it will be easier to look back on them later. Because if something happens I pretty much know why and maybe how it could have prevented(even if I could not see it beforehand) but it's a thing of the past already - nothing can be done about it unless it can be corrected in the future somehow.

Still, I believe having the right company can work better. Just talking about it may ease your mind but having a friend around can help to turn your mind on other things. I have seen that it is a relief even if you cannot or do not want to talk about it.
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Kipshasz
Kipshasz


Undefeatable Hero
Elvin's Darkside
posted July 06, 2007 11:05 PM
Edited by Kipshasz at 23:08, 06 Jul 2007.

physical pain is nothing to me.however emotional pain is very hurtfull to me.
____________
"Kip is the Gavin McInnes of HC" - Salamandre
"Ashan to the Trashcan", "I got PTSD from H7. " - LizardWarrior

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ZodkayCudimraZ
ZodkayCudimraZ


Adventuring Hero
We are Gilraenites
posted July 07, 2007 01:00 AM

Quote:
What works for you? Waiting on comments
In case it crossed your mind - no I'm not an emo


You're not emo? Honey, we're all emo...

What works for me is playing with my Transformers, listening to Dolly Parton sing Raven Dove or Ayumi Hamasaki sing Still Alone. Also, writing the feeling down tends to work well for me. If not for the 1500 or so poems I've written, I'd be as whack as Charles Manson.
____________
Parelzuurstof: kralen aan een kettingzaag geregen voor gebed.

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Elvin
Elvin


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
posted July 07, 2007 02:05 AM

Quote:
Honey, we're all emo...

All of you? I am not much for writing poems myself and...Wait you mentioned transformers..?

People generally seem to prefer dealing with their problems alone through personal activities. Not very surprising, a diversion is usually better than a direct confrontation.
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antipaladin
antipaladin


Promising
Legendary Hero
of Ooohs and Aaahs
posted July 07, 2007 03:53 AM

let me tell you about pains,i got a thing with my sholders make them uneven,that couses great musle pain,i suffer for more then 2 years.
i live wih it,no medicaition helps.
But im alive,and sane,somewhat.
____________
types in obscure english

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Garbax
Garbax


Hired Hero
Struggling with RL
posted July 09, 2007 11:41 PM

I mostly complain about physical pain when i don't have anything better to do, but whenever i need to do something and pain is an obstacle, i just endure it and do what i need to do.

Now, for emotional pain, it depends on which kind of emotional pain:

1. For a breakup: I usually start telling myself some kind of mantra i developed that says something along the lines of "She made a mistake leaving me" or "It's her loss", and spending time with my friend, usually in a pub

2. For the death of someone close: Cherishing their memories, remembering the best times i spent with them, in short, remembering how they would have wished to be remembered.

3. For losing (i.e: A competition, or reprobating an exam): Express my frustration with foul words and  work really hard so that it doesn't happen again.

Physical pain can be overcome, it's the emotional pain that really cripples a person down, and there's always a possibility that it may never heal.
____________
Love is not blind, is retarded

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isabelyes
isabelyes


Fierce Battlegriffin
posted January 01, 2008 05:18 PM

Quote:
Quote:
What works for you? Waiting on comments
In case it crossed your mind - no I'm not an emo


You're not emo? Honey, we're all emo...

(/quote]

yes you are indeed emo! :

"kralen aan een kettingzaag"
____________

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wog_edn
wog_edn

Promising

The Nothingness
posted January 01, 2008 05:31 PM

Kinda half year since this thread were posted in last time...
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Elvin
Elvin


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
posted January 01, 2008 06:03 PM

I've seen worse. Had even forgotten I made that topic, I was in philosophical mode that day
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wog_edn
wog_edn

Promising

The Nothingness
posted January 01, 2008 06:06 PM

Had to get in "I'm not emo"

Duh... on-T though music gets the pain away uhm... but there's also something called pain solution if you break a leg it's possible to make the pain go away by inflicting pain somewhere else. *crushing balls between two big rocks*
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william
william


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
posted January 01, 2008 06:07 PM

Nice topic Elvin.

When I am in physical pain I do either one of two things about it.

1: I go and talk to someone about it. Usually I do not whine or go on about when I am in physical pain, I do not make a big fuss out of it, but when I need to, I just go and talk to someone. Maybe my mum, my sister, or some of my online friends.

It is always good to talk to someone about something. Friends or family can be an excellent way to get your mind off the pain.

2: I listen to Electronic music. This is the one music that can really calm me down. For me, there are some songs which just really affect me because they are so relaxing and just make me calm and generally feel better inside.

Whenever I am feeling sad, or I am angry or stressed, then I turn on some calming Electronic music and just lie on my bed and forget about everything.

This really can help when I am in physical pain. I guess both physical and mental pain as well.
____________
~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~

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