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| Thread: HC RP |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 · «PREV / NEXT» |
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RedSoxFan3
Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
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posted August 08, 2007 06:23 AM |
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RSF has been living in Glade for the past few months. The place had been a well kept secret for quite a long time. However over the past couple years word had got out about the secluded area and is now somewhat common knowledge of its existance. Many still know little of what goes on in the Glade. But the few who do actually visit the place often think of it as home just as RSF does.
As of late some of the spammers have been wandering into the Glade stirring up trouble and RSF decides to leave his house for once and see what they are up to.
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Go Red Sox!
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted August 08, 2007 09:07 AM |
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Edited by william at 09:11, 08 Aug 2007.
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It was a nice Autumn day, as I first stumbled into an unknown place.
I asked for some help, but I was certainly alien to the environment I had entered.
I was confused, scared, and a little nervous at first, but I knocked on the door of the large building I was standing in front of, and within seconds, a man appeared and guided me inside.
He was very polite, and I asked him his name, but he did not respond.
This did not bother me much, but I still was curious to know his name, so I asked him again, but again, no answer.
I asked him for a third time, as we were passing a corner, and he told me his name was Angelito.
I thought it was an odd name, since where I came from, that name was not popular, but I just accepted his answer, and kept walking with him.
"Where exactly are we going" I asked softly, but he did not answer.
I was curious as to where exactly we were heading, but as we passed another corner, we came to a massive Library like place.
It was very bright inside, and at first, the light blinded me temporarily, but as soon as I opened my eyes again, I was able to see again, and take in what exactly I was seeing.
There were massive wooden Bookcases, stacked with books upon books about many things.
It took me a while to get used to the size of this place, and I was just in a state of shock because of what I saw, the books, the massive bookcases, the light, just everything.
I was simple in a state of awe, but I finally snapped out of my trance and then proceeded to going by Angelito once again, who at this stage was talking to a few people.
I didn't catch the names very clearly, but one of them, I think, was called Guitarguy, who much later would become a valuable friend to me.
Well as I waited for Angelito, he asked me to take a seat, and as I took a seat, I was met by some strangers, who I did not know.
We talked for a bit, and then it was time for me to go.
I did not really wanna leave, but as we were leaving, I noticed a card on a big wooden table, and on the card had "Welcome to the Library of Enlightenment".
"So that is what this place is called" I thought to myself, and then a grin appeared on my face.
I walked out the door, but I did not realize how many times I would be seeing this place again in the future.
I was taken to a small hut, where I rested for the night.
After a nice, peacful sleep, I was awoken suddenly in the morning, and was then greeted by knocking on my door.
I raised myself up from my bed, and dragged myself to the door, opened it, and was then introduced to another person, who I had not seen yet.
We engaged in conversation, and I told him that my name was William and he told me his was LegendMaker.
We walked for a bit, talking about many things.
zzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
*suddenly wakes up*
Huh, so that was a dream? I silently said to myself.
I pick myself up from my bed, open the door, and I am greeted by rays of sunshine.
"Great, a nice, sunny day today" I said to myself, as I then proceeded in picking up my bag, and then walking out of my home, and then proceeding to the Volcanic Wastelands.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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kookastar
Honorable
Legendary Hero
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posted August 08, 2007 12:26 PM |
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“Ahhhyeeehaw…. Shiiiiiiiiiiii”
A mouthful of seawater censored Kooka’s cry as her soft curls followed her face into the ocean. She was not going down this way again; not to Pearl, not today, and not like this. Twisting the Kelpie’s mane through her fingers she tensed her thighs and maneuvered herself back onto the mount.
“Hahahahaha,” Pearl’s laughter bit into her consciousness and Kooka leant forward, urging the waterhorse on with her entire body. He responded, and she felt the power of his flank as they chased the nymph through a sandstone archway and towards the Kraken’s outstretched arms. The finish line, she was so close… Sand flicked into her cheek, the thud of hoofs emitting an invigorating cadence that intensified her desire.
Tsherrrringgg
Kooka froze as an alarm shot down her spine. The kelpie ran out from under her as she leapt to the ground and called to an Ocean Monster. “Ooglyboogly.” A waterfall of spit swirled before her and she dove into the whirlpool, the fastest way out of Atlantis.
Freefalling into the coliseum always gave her goosebumps, but this time her arms looked as though they were coated in sago. Looking about the deserted ruins she felt instantly what was amiss. It had been taken… the prophecy of The Great Spam War had begun. She could only hope that the scroll had found its way into a spammer’s hands… it was their only hope.
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uhuh
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted August 08, 2007 12:28 PM |
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William walks down the long winding road, towards the Volcanic Wastelands.
What was there? What would he find?
Well soon time will tell......
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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GenieLord
Honorable
Legendary Hero
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posted August 08, 2007 02:59 PM |
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ADAM was standing in front of a crowd of good heroes.
"This is really ADAM!"
"They were right!"
"ADAM really got loose!"
"I told you he's back"
The good heroes mumbled.
There was a tention in the air. The question was who will attack first.
ADAM was probably very impatience. It seemed like he can't wait anymore.
Everyone was very quiet.
Sunddenly he shouted "Penalty applied to..."
Before he even finished, Elvin's arrow hit him.
Doomforge jumped on ADAM while drawing his sword.
GenieLord catsed Mass Anti Mods.
"Penalty applied to Doomforge" said ADAM and he fell down.
Elite_Kill casted slow on ADAM, that could say only "Penalty... applied... to..." before Homer's fire sword's blade hit him.
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baklava
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
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posted August 08, 2007 03:46 PM |
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Edited by baklava at 16:03, 08 Aug 2007.
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Baklava stood at the corner for about an hour. He was getting quite pissed off. First, ADAM has gone on rampage, he even banned the Georgia font for some reason. And second, Geny needed help. There was no time for waiting.
Geny used some of his last power to send Baklava an HCM telling him he escaped from ADAM, but the robomod was still after him. Baklava had to drag ADAM's attention somehow - after all, he was Responsible. Four stars bring responsibility with them.
Baklava didn't like responsibility. It forced people to do things other than sitting in front of their PC and eating peanuts. But what must be done, must be done.
People gathered around him chose him as a leader. Leadership is ok. It gives you the power to tell people to do stuff for you, so that you can remain at your PC eating peanuts. As the Germans would say, "wonderbra". Or was it "wundaba"?...
The problem was that Baklava blew a joint to help him think. Now, God knows that marijuana does a lot of things, but it certainly doesn't help people think; it seemed like a good idea at the time though. That wouldn't be such a problem by itself, but there was also this fact that a giant cybernetic moderator was attacking them - obviously his attention was turned towards GenieLord and the army he gathered.
Looking across the army, Baklava saw the frightened faces of his soldiers. Some of them he recognized, yes, but most of them were ordinary drafted noobs.
"That's the best I could gather" GenieLord said, sending a magic arrow towards ADAM. "There are good posters among them, but most of them are, well, sort of new to all this."
Baklava nodded absent-mindedly. Think, damn it, think!
And he started thinking.
Not about pornography!
And he stopped thinking. Then, after a small pause for concentration, he started thinking about relevant things.
The situation was like this:
On one side, there was about 50 posters - hired, adventuring, known, even famous and a few supreme heroes - but on the other side, there was a mod. And not even an ordinary mod, but a mod with like... tentacles and stuff. The posters had no chances.
Suddenly, Baklava noticed that he got another HCM. He read it - it was from WarOverlord.
"In dawn look to the east."
Baklava took a look over the mountains. Then he read the rest of the message.
"No. That's west. East is over there ->"
Ah. Fair enough. So all they had to do is survive until dawn.
"GenieLord, what time is it?"
"11 PM."
There was no way that they would live through 6 hours of battle with ADAM. And he was getting dangerously close.
But then, a light shone to the east. Baklava turned his head and saw WarOverlord and SBlister standing there. Then he remembered the different time zones. They meant they will come in dawn GMT. Phew.
ADAM turned his head towards the newly arrived duo. They started walking toward him calmly. SBlister threw Baklava a pretty big war axe. It shined with red light.
"What is that?" GL asked.
"It's the Axe of Perfect Stronghold... It has been imbued with the might of quality posts we made in the Altar of Wishes, before even the Hammers of Fate were announced. SBlister holds the spear of the Perfect Temple, and WarOverlord the Hammer of the Perfect Laboratory. All enchanted with the most quality posts we ever made as a team."
GL just looked in awe. Baklava's face changed - his usually sarcastic eyes were now wide open, shining with a disturbing glow, and over his face passed the frightening smile of a fanatic. It seemed as if he gained about 10 pounds and several zits appeared on his face. The sign on his shirt changed from "Judas Priest" to "Star Trek". Baklava was returning to his ancient roots of geekism.
"My friends" he said. "It has been a long time."
"A long time indeed" WarOverlord and SBlister replied. SBlister even added "dude" to the sentence.
"So... Shall we?"
"Right. Let's move."
They raised their weapons and charged at ADAM. Great, geeky, quality posts started flying everywhere and ADAM stepped back. He couldn't do anything to something so far from spam. GL then ordered other posters to charge and started striking ADAM with more awesome posts - there weren't even grammar mistakes; they were all balanced, without too many smilies, informative and wonderful. Finally, ADAM knelt down and fell on the ground, unconscious. His system was shut down for a while. He seemingly couldn't stand so much quality in those posts and his mechanics collapsed.
"This is just temporary. ADAM's rage will be horrible, his retribution swift. We must hope that Geny will be able to find the mods" GL said.
Baklava slowly returned to normal. The zits and additional punds disappeared. The shirt also returned to Judas Priest.
"Yup" Baklava said, taking out a bag of peanuts. "But until then, I'd best replenish my strength."
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GenieLord
Honorable
Legendary Hero
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posted August 08, 2007 05:27 PM |
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"Baklava" said GenieLord "We have to go to the Libary NOW. The scroll is there and there are not enough people to guard on it. If the spammers just come to the Libary, they can just take it away."
Baklava doesn't seem very happy to walk so much right now. He would prefer to sit on the ground and to eat some of the Tavern's tasty peanuts.
"Okay, let's go" said Baklava, but it doesn't seem like he's very happy with what he has just said.
"Don't worry" said GenieLord "you don't have to walk everywhere. A friend of mine is sitting in the Tavern, right there. He's a Genie from HOMM1. He can take us to the libary on his flying carpet"
Baklava seemed so happy, like he has just gotten 10 QP's peanuts.
They flew to the Libary.
When they got there, they saw a moderator in the entrence.
"Holy censored!" said Baklava.
"Come with me." said GenieLord "I remember where the entrence is"
"What you mean? You said the Coliseum was ruined hundreds of years ago... How old are you?" asked Baklava, that had a suspicious expression.
"This year I'll be 1024 years old" GenieLord answered.
When he saw the shock on Baklava's face he added "Genies are immortal. Genie lives ever since his lamp is built!"]
"Anyway, we can get there from there" said GenieLord "Follow me, I'll dig a bit. The moderator won't even notice"
GenieLord started digging. After a few mintues, while Baklava was sitting and eating peanutes, he got to a corridor.
"I've found something!" he said to Baklava.
They got into the corridor, and saw that it leads to stairs.
The went down the stairs, more and more.
When they got to the ruined Colisuem, they started searching for the scroll.
"It's not here! Someone has taken it!"
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Geny
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted August 08, 2007 06:10 PM |
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Edited by Geny at 18:16, 08 Aug 2007.
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Geny was walking through the Wastelands trying to figure out where he could find Pandora. As he dragged his feet across this scarred land he looked around and some discouraging thoughts crawled into his mind…
“Man, look at this place. After A.D.A.M.’s short visit this place looks like a war zone – fire bursts out of the ground, the air is filled with ash, there’s spam everywhere … oh wait, that’s how the VW usually looks, my bad  .
Anyway, I need to figure out where Pandora is ASAP. Usually I would go to the Partitious Tavern, but I’m too tired for that kind of a trip right now. So let’s hope that she’s somewhere in the Wastelands. But where exactly? The Wastelands may not be as large as the Library, but it’s not a small place either. Let’s see now, where does Pan visit often… There’s of course the Moderator’s Log – she comes there to publish all the spam she burnt, but it could be days before her next clean up… Then there is this new cult that worships Qupting, she might want to check on them, but I hate fanatics, they have no idea how to treat spam properly, they just pour it out… *sigh* the noobs. The stories of the so called “Big Brother” also caught her attention and it would be fun to hear them again, but they are a thing of the past, I doubt she’ll be there… That leaves me with “The Guitaring Willy show”, Pan always loved to laugh at those two, especially the little one, what do they call him nowadays? I think it’s Shmalf… Oh well.”
And so Geny began his journey to the place where “The Guitaring Willy show” was held. The spammers that he saw on the way were all in bad shape because of the penalties, but so was he and he couldn’t help them in any way like that. All he could do was to promise the spammers that he’ll talk to the mods and straighten things out.
He kept walking until something caught his leg and he almost fell. Geny looked down and saw a little red demon lying on the ground and holding Geny’s leg in his hand. Geny recognized him right away, it was Trogdor – the self proclaimed ruler of all existence. He was bad-mannered even in the normal times, but now after A.D.A.M. had his way with this little fellow, he couldn’t even stand up. Geny tried to carry him to the show, because he knew no one enjoys laughing at Shmalf like Trogdor, but he was no shape to lift him.
“Stay here, Trogdor”, said Geny to the little red riding hood demon. “I’m going to that show now. If we’re lucky, I’ll find Pan there and she’ll fix everything and if not… well at least I’ll tell you what went on in the show this time. Just hold on  .”
And so, Geny left this infamous spammer and continued his trip towards the show…
____________
DON'T BE A NOOB, JOIN A.D.V.E.N.T.U.R.E.
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Tenaka
Famous Hero
Makes sense
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posted August 08, 2007 06:25 PM |
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Edited by Tenaka at 19:09, 08 Aug 2007.
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How A.D.A.M got to the Tavern in the first place
Tenaka had just returned from the Qupting Pyramids*, where he had added some quotes - he was still mad on the mods -, when he got suddenly hit square in the eye with a donut.
"Aw, goddamned! Who threw that?!" He fell on his back. Boy, that was a hard donut. Harder than...Well, he couldn't really think of a non-sexual metaphor. When he got up again, the metal thing was standing a front of him. The donut was gone.
"Hey, did you throw that? That really hurt like hell!" he asked the robot. It didn't reply to his question.
Violation: Cursing. User: Tenaka. Pun: Mute activated in 10 seconds.
At first, Tenaka was not impressed. It was just a robot, right? When it started to count down, he got a little worried. By the time it reached 5, he had panicked. He had only a few seconds left before he was muted, so he did the only thing one can do at such a point. Run? No, in the wastelands, everything was random, so he could trip over one of those new spider pigs that had been appearing in thousands lately. No, he couldn't run.
He kicked the robot in the crouch.
At first sight, nothing happened. It did stop the countdown though. Then, it shivered.
"Quality point applied to Tenaka."
It then turned around, and walked off towards the tavern. Tenaka had a bad feeling about it, so he set cours to the Tavern of the Rising Sun as well, while sulking about donuts and ale.
The Wastelands were deserted, volcanic, and full of spam. As always. Tenaka had lost sight of A.D.A.M, but he knew where he was going, so he didn't really care about that. The spam, however, seemed to get denser and denser every minute, and it was becoming hard to progress. He wondered what had caused this sudden flood of spam, when he suddenly noticed Mvallisev sitting at the side of the road. Well, that explained a lot.
A bit further, Tenaka sat down himself, exhausted by now. He tried browsing through the spam, but noticed fairly quickly that it was pretty much the same as always...
"So does TPAM..."
"TROGDOR STRIKES AGAIN!!!1!1!
"LiZaRdMeN was here. Rune of Berserk + Rune of Battle Rage + Berserker Rage = PWNAGE!         "
"OMFGWTHLOLBBQ!    "
...After a while, he stood up again, leaving his breakfast of that morning in the gutter of the road...
Eventually, he reached the tavern. The robot was lying on the ground, and Tenaka let out of sigh of relief. With that iron thing defeated - he didn't know that it was only stunned for a few minutes -, there was no one to be held responsible for how it got free in the first place, right? (RIGHT?)
But when he noticed some of the damage that had been done to the Tavern, he couldn't help but feel a small sting of guilt, and asked out loud, to no one in particular:
"Hey, um...What happened here?"
*The Qupting pyramids not only serve as the source of energy for the spammers' magic, but also made the Volcanic Wastelands survivable by absorbing any redundant spam. (Even the spammers themselves could die of too much spam.) This way, the spam that would otherwise be separated and easy to delete, became a massive construction of irrelevant posts, containing quotes from 'The Person Above Me', to 'Who post next?'. It is said that not even Valeriy can destroy them, but there are rumors that he made them himself, long ago, in the time before time. (While still staying 24 years old. Now that's magic!)
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baklava
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
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posted August 08, 2007 06:39 PM |
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Baklava shook his arms, irritated.
"So no one touches the scroll for 10000 years and now that we come to guard it, someone takes it. I should've guessed."
He needed to think again. Thinking is a complex process that requires some mental lubrication. Baklava put his hand in his pocket and suddenly his face got pale.
"No... Impossible..."
"What is it?" GL asked.
Baklava looked around himself maniacally, searching for some sign. Finally he found it: above a dusty bookshelf stood an old sign: "ICTC1".
Digging through the scrolls, Baklava randomly opened a few of them and shook his head each time. Then he found a scroll, named "Glacier".
"Ah."
GenieLord was confused.
"What's that?"
"It's my entry to ICTC1."
GenieLord's confusion gained a completely new dimension.
"ICTC1? But that was... A millenia ago!"
"Was it? Can't remember."
"But... but..." GenieLord struggled to find a rational explanation. "You're 15..."
"16, in less than a month" Baklava corrected him. He broke the seal on the scroll.
"That means that you had -985 years when you entered the contest!"
"Really?" Baklava asked. His mind was absent, though. He was concentrated on opening the scroll. "Must be because of the riftwalking to RL and stuff... Time differs from dimension to dimension." Finally, he opened the scroll and took a small pack of peanuts out of it.
"Ah, there they are. Can you believe I actually ran out of peanuts in my pockets?" He blew the dust off the pack and opened it. "I'm lucky I stashed some in my ICTC1 entry..." Putting a primordial peanut in his mouth, he added: "Hm... Not bad. A bit decomposing, but good overall."
GenieLord just nodded in resignation. It was best not to think about some things.
"So, uhm, what are we going to do now?"
"Well, the obvious solution is trying to find the scroll. Now, how can we do that?"
"I have no idea" GenieLord said. Then he sighed. "I wish KD was here."
Baklava's eyes widened.
"That's it! Watson, you're a genius!"
"'Watson'?"
"What?"
"You said 'Watson'" GenieLord said.
"Did I? I meant 'GenieLord'."
"Waiwaiwait... Are you assuming the role of Sherlock Holmes here?" GL said.
"No... Well, perhaps, a bit. Why?"
"Why would you be Sherlock and me Watson? Watson is totally second-grade compared to Sherlock..."
"What? That's not true, Watson is awesome" Baklava said. His love for pointless discussions dragged him strongly from his current task.
"Well why won't you be Watson then?"
"Uhm... Tell you what, I'll be Batman and you'll be Robin. Fair enough?"
"That's even worse!"
"Well you can be Catwoman then."
GenieLord sighed. "Never mind. Just... never mind. What are you up to anyway?"
"I'll explain it along the way. First we need to find some yellow pages."
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wog_edn
Promising
The Nothingness
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posted August 09, 2007 12:07 AM |
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Edited by wog_edn at 00:12, 09 Aug 2007.
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EDN walked through the corridors, his eyes looking around. They looked haunted, but in the truth he were afraid. The scroll he had taken gave him power, it seemed, great power. But he didn't understand the writings, he had tried to read it but couldn't understand the language. Now he went for the part of the Library where the anscient languages were written down. Suddenly he stopped, he heard voices. He wanted no one to see him, especially not Angelito. The scroll was his... his own, his precious! He waited, Angelito talked to someone. When the voices faded away EDN waited a little moment then he continued on, and in a couple of moments he reached the section for Anscient Languages. He opened the door as careful as he could, and looked inside. No one. Then he entered, starting to look through the books there to find symbols that matched. He found soon, it was Futhark, old norwegian. Then he read the alphabet of Futhark, it was really simple so he knew it all within an half hour. Then he started translating the scroll, his eyes widened already in the first line where he saw it was all about dark spam. He continued reading though, being drawn more and more into the darknes of the art of spamming. There were power, great power. Power to challenge even a mod, which only one had been able to through all time... KnightDougal. EDN closed his eyes, this was much for him to be able to control. Then he read the last line, and everything he saw became red. At least he thought so, his eyes had become red, and suddenly he felt a burning hatred for law and justice inside. What was he doing here? He would never be able to accomplish anything anyway, he was just another nobody that would leave no trace. No! He would make them remember his name, he would make them all remember him as the most dangerous and powerful spammer ever! Angelito had ignored him and kept him out of things one time to much...
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GenieLord
Honorable
Legendary Hero
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posted August 09, 2007 01:53 PM |
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Deep under where END was standing, in the ruins of Age of Heroes Coliseum, GenieLord and Baklava were talking.
"Yellow pages?" asked GenieLord, confused.
"Yep" answered Baklava.
GenieLord didn't have idea why does Baklava need yellow pages, but he agreed.
"I'll search for it there. You search here."
He summoned some Earth Elemental to help them finiding the yellow pages.
After a couple of minutes GenieLord have found it.
"Okay, Baklava. What do you need?" asked GenieLord
"Go to 'Nacromancers'" said Baklava.
"Maps... Modders... Moderators... Newbies... Necromancers!"
"Let me see..." said Baklava.
GenieLord gave him the yellow pages.
"We can call the vampire Vokial" said Baklava.
"Nah... He left HC hundred of years ago"
"What about TitaniumAlloy?" asked Baklava.
"So many people call him, he is too busy and expensive" said GenieLord "why do you need Necromancer anyway?"
Baklava didn't answer.
Sunddenly he said "That's pefect!"
"Who?" asked GenieLord.
"The_Death!" answered Baklava.
"Well, he's expert in reviving spammers!" said GenieLord.
GenieLord sent The Death_HCM.
"No! Don't send HCM! He kills who sends him HCM's!" said Baklava.
"Okay" said GenieLord "I'll just summon him"
The_Death appeared in front of them.
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RedSoxFan3
Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
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posted August 09, 2007 03:48 PM |
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A young teen about the age of 14 stared out at the massive gates of HC. Dear Morons smiled deviously as another potential member stood before him ready to be corrupted. He stood up from his wooden stump and approached the boy.
"Hey there m'lad," Dear Morons called out. The boy turns to look at him. "You seem pretty interested in that place. Would you like me to tell you some cool things about that place?" The boy smiled at him.
"Why sure!" he said. "What's so cool about this place? And what's with that massive gate?"
"Well the coolest part about that place is probably Wastelands. That's one of the craziest, funnest places to just let loose and have a good time on the internet. It wasn't always that way though. Wastelands was a place the mods created to dump all their so called 'crappy' threads so it wouldn't stink up all the forums." The boy frowned at him.
"What's so great about that place then?"
"Well I will tell you," Dear Morons smiled. "For a while, the wastelands served its purpose. Threads were moved there and after a few days they were destroyed. However after a few years, the members began to feel create new threads in the wastelands and it soon became the most active forum. The mods became very upset and if it was up to some of them, Wastelands would not even exist. Some members were even banned from the lands of HC and they put up those massive gates to keep them out and to intimidate new members from breaking the rules." Dear Morons took a big sigh.
"I just wish the moderators could see the potential to have fun in HC. But you should go on in and definitely check out Wastelands. It's a lot of fun."
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Go Red Sox!
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wog_edn
Promising
The Nothingness
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posted August 09, 2007 05:43 PM |
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EDN walked quickly for the door, opening it and then his eyes widened in surprise. Some jerk stood there, blocking his way out. EDN noticed the silver armor, and understood it was a guard.
"You have broken the rules, and spammed inside the Library of Enlightment." the guard said, "You are under arrest, come with me."
"Of course." EDN hissed, then threw some of the dark spam-magic against the guard.
The guard were blown backward, and struck the wall in the other side of the corridor. The body lay there, not moving. Still EDN could hear the breathing of the guard, only unconsious.
"No one challenges me!" EDN hissed, then ran off against the exit.
He didn't reveal any of his dark powers when running, letting everyone he passed stay unharmed. Then he reached the doors, and slammed them open. Sunlight filled his vision, to much light! He closed his eyes in despair and waited. It would take a couple of minutes for him to adjust from the little light inside the Library 'til the bright sunlight. After a minute he opened them again, and walked off. He needed allies, spammers. He knew who the first should be, the first waited outside the Gateway.
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pandora
Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
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posted August 09, 2007 10:26 PM |
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Edited by pandora at 22:29, 09 Aug 2007.
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I entered the Wastelands, chuckling to myself as the spammers rushed to post in their threads quickly so I wouldn't delete them.
"Ohhhhh nooooooooesss" one cried "I've made the last three posts, someone quick, save my thread from her!
He was too late, I absently waved a hand in the direction of the thread and with a *poof* it was gone. All that was left were the ashes, I stood and watched as they rose up and floated off to my mod log - and etched the thread's title on the parchment. I used to write them all myself, but since learning that little trick, it's been ever so much easier.
"Who has seen Geny?" I asked a crowd of wannabe spammers. None responded, of course not, they'd all spammed 20 times today and now were shushed. That sure gets irritating...
One spammer caught my eye, as I watched his face seemed to morph from one image to another.
"A clone!" I said disgustedly.
I quickly teleported myself to the great golden tree that housed all the members and began to prune, member after member fell to the ground like autumn leaves. I smiles as they dried out, crumbled and finally blew away.
Satisfied that things seemed tidy again, I returned to the Wastelands in search of Geny. As I walked I tripped again, and cursed loudly at Valeriys too long robes. Just as I had uttered the words, there was a loud whooshing sound and I heard his metallic voice above me.
"PENALTY APLLIED TO PAND --- NOOOOOOOOO!"
A.D.A.M as usual responded to the CoC breach without first checking who the offender was - and when he saw it was me, he took off just as quickly as he showed up.
"Hey!!! Those are my robes you sunuva....." I screamed, shaking a fist at him.
I thought to pursue him, but changed my mind as it occurred to me that if he had truly regained his moderator power, then it might also be true that Geny had been banned. Why on earth hadn't Valeriy demodded him? I will have to recommend that in our next meeting - but for now I was worried about Geny I would have to find him... fast.
I felt something tugging at the bottom of my robes, and was about to kick it away when I realized it was Trogdor.. he was pointing miserably in the direction of the "Guitaring Willy Show".
"Geny..... there..." he gasped.
In a moment of uncommon sympathy, I awarded Trogdor enough just enough QP's to alleviate his suffering - and ran off to find Geny.
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"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
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Geny
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted August 10, 2007 10:16 AM |
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Edited by Geny at 10:22, 10 Aug 2007.
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Geny finally made it to the show. There weren't many people there, and he quickly realized Pandora is not one of them. Geny sighed, he just lacked the power, both physical and mental, to continue the search. He decided to rest for a while and enjoy the show as long as he's here. The small guy was missing, but guitarguy didn't seem to care and kept on playing. Looking closely Geny noticed that gg's eyes are closed.
"He's probably in some state of Nirvana", Geny thought to himself, then he sighed again, "I'd like to be like that too, but I didn't take my bottle with me. "
Geny wasn't really sure how much time he sat there and to be truthful - he didn't care either, but after a while he saw a figure coming his way. He tried to see who it was and all he could see were big, red robes.
"It looks like Val... wait a sec, Valeriy in the VW? Wasn't that how my dream ended? This was definatly a vision then. Hmmm, so what happened next? Ah yes, Val approached me and offered to buy me a drink. It's not even noon yet... but who cares! I never refuse a free drink!"
As these thoughts passed through the head of the Spam Lord the figure came closer. Geny noticed, to his surprise, that Valeriy seemed to have a hard time moving in his robes, as if they were too big for him. He watched the figure, intrigued in what's going on. As the robed man approached him, Geny finally realized that wasn't a man, but a woman... a Canadian woman!
"Pan! Am I glad to see you here!" He shouted and jumped up from his seat as if the mere presence of Pandora diminished the power of A.D.A.M.'s penalties.
"There you are, I've been looking all around for you. Rumors said that A.D.A.M wanted to ban you."
"So he did. Even my sharp mind barely saved me. What's he doing walking around, anyway? Wasn't it the mods job to keep him locked!!! "
"Geny the Spammer, do not test my patience! The mods don't have to answer to you! Our ways are too secret and special for your understanding!.. And it wasn't our fault, anyway, so there."
"All right, all right, I just asked... sheesh... By the way, Pan, could you do something about those penalties? They're really starting to get on my nerves."
"Why? I think they look good on you. Besides, every spammer has got to have at least one penalty."
"Paaaaan..."
"Just kidding", Pandora waved her hand and at the same moment the penalties were gone. Geny stood up straight, feeling stronger than ever.
"Ahh, that's better. I do have one problem though... A.D.A.M. decided to ban me and I doubt he forgot that."
"Well, I could hide you from him if you wish."
"Hide?! Geny never runs away and hides!.. Unless of course he is in danger of being banned... so where were you going to hide me, anyway?"
"I was thinking about A.D.A.M.'s cage, it's empty now and no one will look for you there."
"What?!?! No! It stinks of... of... uhm... metal?"
"How about the ModSquad HQ attic then?"
"No thanks, I've heard the stories about b... you know who being locked up there for all eternity. I don't even want to imagine the kind of stench he left behind."
"Well aren't we picky. Oh all right, I'll hide you in my mod tower, just promise to behave."
"Tempting as it is (and it is very tempting!), I'll be found there in no time. You have no idea how many spammers are trying to peek through your windows... some of them even say they succeeded!"
"I sure hope not!"
"Hope dies last..."
"OMG, what times are we in when a girl can't even walk naked in her own tower... wait a minute, that's it! I know just the place to hide you..."
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DON'T BE A NOOB, JOIN A.D.V.E.N.T.U.R.E.
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baklava
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
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posted August 10, 2007 02:27 PM |
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"Weren't there supposed to be like shiny runes, chanting and stuff?" Baklava asked suspiciously, as The_Death appeared with a quiet 'POOF' sound.
"Nah, this is The_Death, not Christopher Walken..." GenieLord answered. "The_Death isn't a weirdo. It's enough to call him."
"Fair enough..."
Then The_Death decided to speak.
"Who disturbs my posting?"
"Uhm... We do." Baklava answered. He ate a peanut to give him courage.
"sigh... And who ARE you?" The_Death was persistent.
"I'm Baklava, this is GL. We want to ask you a favour."
"What favour?"
"We need you to return a person from the dead."
"It seems you do not comprehend the nature of my business... I take lives, not grant them... Now if you'll excuse me, I've got posts to make." Having said that, The_Death turned around and prepared to leave.
But Baklava stopped him with a simple "Why?"
The_Death turned around again, this time back towards Baklava.
"I don't know, that's what I do."
"But have you ever tried to revive someone? Think of how fun it must be" Baklava said.
The_Death seemed to ponder that for a sec.
"Yeah... I guess... But it's against the law."
"Oh, so you bow to the laws..." Baklava said with a cold voice.
"I... No, it's not like that, it's just..."
"No, no problem. I understand. After all, you are afraid for your career, right?" Baklava said with an undermining smile.
"AFRAID?!" The_Death became even grimmer than before. "I AM NEVER AFRAID, I AM WHAT PEOPLE ARE AFRAID OF!" He became quite pissed.
"It didn't seem that way just a moment ago" Baklava stated, the smile still dancing on his face.
"THAT'S IT!" The_Death hissed. Then he raised one of his bony hands. "Behold the power of the underworld..."
The sky became dark purple and the ground started shaking. Suddenly, hands sprayed out of the ground, followed by bodies of those who raised from the earth.
"Ok" Baklava said to GenieLord, pushing undead Napoleon away. "Now we just have to find KD among these guys."
"That's going to be a bit tough" GL said. Then he pointed his finger at one of the people who rose again. "Oh my God, is that Elvis?"
"Tough?" Baklava said. "But you're a Genie. Use your magic."
"Look, that's not how it works... I summon stuff, I can't just find anyone anywhere..."
"Well then summon KD here."
"Hm... Good idea."
Another poof sound was heard and a figure was standing in front of them. It had an armor and a rusty sword. During his days of life, KD was a self-proclaimed knight. So, now that he was undead, he was technically a death knight.
"KD, is that you?" Baklava asked.
"DKD!"
"What?"
"I am now DKD. Dteah Kinght Dogaul."
"I see. Very well, Death Knight Dougal it is, then." Baklava agreed. "Anyway, we need your help."
"My hlep?" DKD asked.
"Yes, we'll explain everything along the way." Baklava then took a glance around himself. Undead Stalin took out a gravestone and started hitting undead Hitler with it. "First it would be best if we got out of here..."
"Don't worry" GL said, while undead Churchill entered the fray. He chopped off someone's leg and slammed it right into Stalin's face, kicking Hitler in the balls afterwards and cursing heavily along the way. "We'll go on my magic carpet." Then he took out a carpet from, seemingly, out of nowhere. "Everyone get in."
They jumped on the carpet and flied off.
"Alright," Baklava said. "Are we all here? GenieLord, DeathKnightDougal, me, Abraham Lincoln... Abraham Lincoln?!"
"Hello" said Abraham Lincoln.
A moment of silence followed.
"This isn't happening..." Baklava said. "Abraham Lincoln, for the love of weed, what are you doing here?"
"I'm not quite sure" Abraham Lincoln replied.
"Kick him out" GenieLord said. "He smells funny."
"We can't just dump him here dude!" Baklava said. "He might get killed again. Besides, how would you smell after two centuries in a coffin?"
"And I might help you gentlemen in your quest" Abraham Lincoln added.
"Oh alright..." GL said. "I guess it could've been worse... I'll set course to the Tavern, we'll explain everything to DKD and make a plan there."
"And a fine plan it shall be!"
"Shut up Abe."
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pandora
Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
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posted August 10, 2007 07:27 PM |
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I smiled to myself, it was absolutely perfect!
"Geny take my hand" I said, grabbing his hand as I prepared to ship us both to the tavern. I almost let go mid-teleport when I felt how greasy his spammy hand was. Luckily I managed to maintain my grip - I'm not sure what happens when mods let go during the trip, but it's probably not good for the posters.
We landed in the far reaches of the Tavern, back in the old houses where people still talked about heroes related things. Geny looked confused, so I explained
"I'm trying to cover our tracks, if we go where no one is looking A.D.A.M can't find us - he is unable to use HCM's so he can't follow us that way, and the Who is Online function can't keep up with is if we move quickly enough"
Geny looked a little bit uncertain, but didn't say anything. I looked up to the great Golden tree, quickly scanning it's long branches - "There!" I reached out and towards one of the oldest branches and said "Oldtimer"
Once we were there, we could jump through Oldtimer's history and see all the places he'd created.
"Okay, now Geny - don't look - there are two ways to enter here, one is through the front door, and the other is to be a naked chick."
I didn't trust Geny not to peek, so I blindfolded him quickly and shucked off Valeriy's robes. Instantly I heard that old familiar voice
"How YOU doin'?"
Once the words were spoken, we were whisked inside and I slipped back into Valeriy's robes. I took off geny's blindfold and said
"Voila! Nobody comes in here anymore... you should be safe! Once in a while Kookie and I come in for a pillow fight, but I'm sure we can just find somewhere else to play until you're ready to return..."
Geny looked a bit sad... "So no naked chicks?" he asked.
"Well, who knows, maybe you'll get lucky... in the meantime I'll bring you sour ram's testicles and spamburgers to eat whenever I get the chance. And if you're really well behaved I will bring you leftover soup on Fridays . But whatever you do, don't step foot or even peek out the front door before I tell you it's safe..."
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"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
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Elvin
Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
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posted August 11, 2007 10:44 PM |
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Since I last shot an arrow at ADAM I had experienced a dimensional drifting which occasionally plagues me when it's too - must be a malfunction of my portal from the other world. Thankfully I could soon re-establish a link by tapping on firefox's arcane power and returned to the temple but there was none to be seen.
Using my superior tracking powers(and the HC messenger's assistance) I spotted Alcibiades editing a spam post even amidst all this chaos. If there is one thing ADAM cannot face it is order so that would make Alc immune to any harm and might even drive ADAM away till we can find a better solution.
"Good to see you Alc, I need your help. Most good heroes do not dare to post for fear of drawing attention and Pandora is in her tower - Do you know any way of incapacitating ADAM?"
He turns to regard me. "ADAM's power lies in his sword, as long as he has the sword he is invincible. Only Val can remove it but he's not around."
Hmm. "Does he call 'By the power of HC' to gain his strength? "
"Rofl Anyway I will lead the way with my hammer, stay behind me and you'll be safe. We must try to repulse him or else he will move all the threads to the wastelands which under all this weight may open a rift to the negative plane material. Or even worse contaminate quality threads with the overflowing spam current that will rise. Not even he will be able to fix this."
With the last remark Alc cringes but soon regains his steel determination and starts off towards the location ADAM was last seen. I can't help but sympathise, imagine him having to lock all these threads I wonder if he has been training for this incident all this time.
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H5 is still alive and kicking, join us in the Duel Map discord server!
Map also hosted on Moddb
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GenieLord
Honorable
Legendary Hero
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posted August 12, 2007 08:22 PM |
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Baklava, DeathKnightDougal and GenieLord were standing in the ruins of Age of Heroes Coliseum, buried under the libary.
"Come with us DKD" said GenieLord "We need your help. We need to..."
"Sapm Hereso Comumntiy!" contineud DKD.
"No, no, no!" said Baklava
"We need you to come with us and teach us how to fight the dark spam magics of the great scroll and..." said GenieLord
"Spraed a lto sapm in Hereos Cummonty!" said DKD.
"It doesn't seem he understands" said Baklava, desperate.
"Hey!" shouted GenieLord "He is trying to run away!"
Baklava holded KDK.
"Great, keep holding him..." said GenieLord "He can struggle"
"I cna srtugel!" said KDK and struggled.
It was really hard for Baklava to hold him.
"How can we keep him?" asked GenieLord "He can teleport..."
"I cna teleprot!" said KDK and teleported away.
"What can we do now?" said baklava.
He seemed to be so nervous. Both GenieLord and Baklava knew what KDK might do.
They used a couple of Air Elementals (that were summoned by GenieLord) to get to the Tavern.
When the got closer they heard people screaming from everywhere.
"The entire building was destroyed!"
"KnightDougal did that!"
"So many people were killed!"
"The dark spam days are back!"
"What happened?" asked GenieLord
"Let's try to ask people"
"Hey, there is Trogdor" said Baklava.
They got closer to Trogdor, that was sitting holding a sign in his hands.
On the sign was written "can't talk - already had 446 posts in the last 24 hours"
"446?!" said GenieLord, shocked "I thought the allow 20 posts! How did you get that?"
Trogdor revealed another sign "I was nice to Pandora and didn't stare at the Tower's window for 24 hours"
GenieLord and Baklava heard people screaming
"So many dead people"
"One told me that the temple was attacked by a Spam Storm"
"How is the fool that brought KnightDougal back to life?"
"We have to check what's going on in the Temple" said GenieLord quickly.
Baklava was blushing like TNT when he stands next to Kookastar.
"Let's do it quickly without telling anyone we revived DKD"
said Baklava.
When the got to the Temple, it looked destroyed.
Most of the roof crashed down, bricks were all over the place and only few poles remain standing.
One of the angels in the entrence was broken to small pieces, but the other one lost its both wings and remain standing, headless.
DKD was there.
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