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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: Tragic and Touching Stories of Unfortunate Youth
Thread: Tragic and Touching Stories of Unfortunate Youth This thread is 2 pages long: 1 2 · NEXT»
baklava
baklava


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Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
posted August 16, 2008 12:10 PM

Tragic and Touching Stories of Unfortunate Youth

Part 1

“No! Please! Not again!” he yelled desperately, while they once again put a plate of broccoli in front of him. He could see the cold smile of his mom, he could see infernal flames in her eyes as she gave him a fork and calmly said: “You have to eat your greens, Sebastian.”
“But I don’t want to” he tried to reason with them. “They taste like roadkills.”
That was a mistake. Furious, his father turned to his inborn brutality:
“You will eat your greens, young man, or there’s no TV the whole afternoon.”
He felt the tears running down his face. He couldn’t stop them. Tears of horror and desperation, marking all the pain and injustice in the world. He tried to comfort himself - his buddy, Mark, had parents which made him eat broccoli once a WEEK. THAT was truly inhumane. But still, Sebastian’s misfortune was undeniable. Broccoli didn’t cause Sebastian only physical wounds; he also felt inner pain as he glanced at them. Their dark greenish colour reminded of the Twi’Regs from planet Skarr 13 that Astroman fought off when they invaded Saturn Base in episode 24. Wait, that’s it, he thought, as he decided to imagine he’s Astroman’s faithful Spacebot devouring Twi’Regs. Astroman’s faithful Spacebot, however, did not have the sense of taste, unlike Sebastian, but he tried to ignore this fact. According to his father’s stare he felt that any action except eating the bloody broccoli was not an option right now. So he took the fork-blaster, pointed it at the closest Twi’Reg, stabbed him and pulled him toward his mouth.
And it tasted like the seventh circle of Hell.
Oh how he wished he was one of those children on TV. They didn’t have to eat anything. Munching on the vile broccoli, he decided he is definitely going to travel there some day, wherever Somalia was.

To be continued if I find the time


Inspired by GL's and William's real-life stories.
____________
"Let me tell you what the blues
is. When you ain't got no
money,
you got the blues."
Howlin Wolf

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Asheera
Asheera


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Elite Assassin
posted August 16, 2008 01:03 PM

LOL

I don't find this tragic, I find this funny
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baklava
baklava


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posted August 16, 2008 01:07 PM

What?
How can you be so insensitive? The boy had to eat broccoli
____________
"Let me tell you what the blues
is. When you ain't got no
money,
you got the blues."
Howlin Wolf

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TnT_Addict
TnT_Addict


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Beautiful Liar
posted August 16, 2008 01:13 PM

Are you that boy Baklava?

If that's so then I feel your pain man, it's a good thing you shared it with us
____________

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Asheera
Asheera


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posted August 16, 2008 01:13 PM

It's not like they cut his arm or something
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baklava
baklava


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posted August 16, 2008 01:17 PM
Edited by baklava at 13:19, 16 Aug 2008.

@TNT
No, Sebastian is a fictional person, but he stands as a symbol for all the suffering that American/European mid-class children go through these days. I did live through similar horrors at times during my childhood, though.
Sebastian is just an innocent young boy tossed into the cold, ruthless world of school and broccoli.

@Asheera
You've apparently never tried broccoli.
____________
"Let me tell you what the blues
is. When you ain't got no
money,
you got the blues."
Howlin Wolf

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Asheera
Asheera


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posted August 16, 2008 01:21 PM

Quote:
You've apparently never tried broccoli.
That's true, but now, is it that bad

Is this thread sarcastic or not?

... seriously ...
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Elvin
Elvin


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Endless Revival
posted August 16, 2008 01:25 PM

Haha marvelous The tragedy, the horror!
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baklava
baklava


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posted August 16, 2008 01:25 PM

Sarcastic? Me?

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TnT_Addict
TnT_Addict


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Beautiful Liar
posted August 16, 2008 01:25 PM

Quote:
Is this thread sarcastic or not?

How can you say that? How insensitive one person could get

Poor Sebastians life will never be the same after he had a taste of the green substance and Baklava spilled all his inner hurt in that story and you question all of that?
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alcibiades
alcibiades


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of Gold Dragons
posted August 16, 2008 01:26 PM
Edited by alcibiades at 13:28, 16 Aug 2008.

I like Broccoli. Brussel Sprouts, on the other hand ...

EDIT: Here's a real act of inhumanity:


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What will happen now?

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Asheera
Asheera


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posted August 16, 2008 01:26 PM

Quote:
Sarcastic? Me?
Alright, I'll take that as a 'yes'
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Cepheus
Cepheus


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posted August 16, 2008 01:27 PM

This tale disgusts and disturbs me on levels previously unknown to humankind.

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Asheera
Asheera


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posted August 16, 2008 01:29 PM

Wait, aren't Chickens vegetarians?
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Cepheus
Cepheus


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posted August 16, 2008 01:30 PM

Wait, aren't cakes inanimate...?

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Asheera
Asheera


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posted August 16, 2008 01:33 PM

I was saying that if Chickens (you) are vegetarians, how can you say that this tale disgusts you?
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Cepheus
Cepheus


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posted August 16, 2008 01:38 PM

Well, I'm not really disgusted, I'm just building and building on the layers of sarcasm

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Elvin
Elvin


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Endless Revival
posted August 16, 2008 01:42 PM

I can only think of one thing that is scarier. This one!
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VokialBG
VokialBG


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posted August 16, 2008 02:03 PM
Edited by VokialBG at 14:04, 16 Aug 2008.

Broccoli, brussel sprouts, asparagus, Elvins one... Thanks God, I'm in Bulgaria you can plant whatever you want here, even chestnut-trees
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friendofgunnar
friendofgunnar


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able to speed up time
posted August 16, 2008 04:35 PM

ahh, you've identified one of the glaring weaknesses of western culture, the habit of mothers to put a portion of unseasoned over-stewed vegetables on the side of the plate and then to threaten denial of dessert until the greens are finished.  You'd think that with all the marvelous accomplishments that white people have garnered over the centuries, they'd figure out a way to incorporate the flavorings of vegetables into other dishes with a result pleasing to the senses. Now I find that this failing extends into Serbia as well. Is this a genetic trait?  Will doctors eventually find the bad taste gene and cure it such that white children will suffer that much less during childhood?

Some fun facts about broccoli:

It's really high in vanadium, a necessary trace element.  (as well as cabbage, cauliflower, brussel sprouts, and kale)

When I was in Hong Kong a few years back, on two seperate occasions I had a dish with some spectacularly yummy broccoli (the european kind).  perhaps freshness counts for something?

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