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| Thread: I find this very disturbing |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 · «PREV / NEXT» |
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Elvin
Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
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posted August 08, 2009 12:03 PM |
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Azagal it is supposed to be a last resort if all else fails. Ideally you will never have to raise a hand but children are not adults, they will not think and will test you to see how far your tolerance goes. There dialogue will not work, grounding may not work - did you seriously think that because that it would with you it is true for everyone? Simply put there are the 'good' chilren than follow their parents' example and the spoiled unruly ones.
About what Joonas said. I had been a spoiled brat at some time even though my parents were good rolemodels, they had to show me that some things are absolutely off limits and punishable. That left me no issues, on the contrary it disciplined me and I am glad it did. A kid with strong will? Gimme a break, EVERYONE will be forced to change their ways because they are simply not hardened up like an adult. All that defiance stuff is an outward facade, they hurt and they are vulnerable. As others have said before a few slaps are NOTHING compared to what you will find meet in life later on, what kind of pain would you rather be caused to them? Or do you think a judge would apply the law to spanking?
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Doomforge
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Retired Hero
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posted August 08, 2009 01:33 PM |
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Yeah, what Elvin said. Ohh, the horror, your mamma spanked your butt once or twice! Your life ends in tears and misery. Lmfao. Look at the brighter side: you have been taught that life is unforgiving the hard way.
It's funny but getting grounded and such fails more often than not. My sister's kiddo developed some sort of rebellious attitude after that. He'd get grounded, endure it and still remain an ***hole afterwards. Oh, and without forgetting to call his mother names in progress 
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JoonasTo
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted August 08, 2009 01:44 PM |
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Edited by JoonasTo at 13:48, 08 Aug 2009.
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When he calls her names she should just add to the isolation.
Try banning electronics, books, tv, phone and when he's got a month or so isolation I bet he'll be silent from that on.
Another way would be just to be ignorant about the name calling but showing no signs outside is impossible to most people. Especially when it's someone who knows you really well like your kid.
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Doomforge
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Retired Hero
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posted August 08, 2009 02:03 PM |
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Easy to say, but nothing really works in practice... nothing non violent.
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Ednaguy
Supreme Hero
My water just broke! No, wait.
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posted August 08, 2009 02:04 PM |
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It's time to call Nanny 911.
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JoonasTo
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted August 08, 2009 02:16 PM |
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Oh it does.
Besides violence doesn't work with people who have a will strong enough.
You'd have to go to such limits that it would stay with the kid forever.
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Cepheus
Honorable
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Far-flung Keeper
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posted August 08, 2009 03:05 PM |
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Might I ask how many of you have raised children, anyway?
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"Those who forget their history are inevitably doomed to repeat it." —Proverb, Might and Magic VIII
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Geny
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted August 08, 2009 03:11 PM |
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We've all been tolerating xerox, does that count?
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Cepheus
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posted August 08, 2009 03:17 PM |
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Well, surely we all know by now that he's not human, let alone a child...
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"Those who forget their history are inevitably doomed to repeat it." —Proverb, Might and Magic VIII
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TheDeath
Responsible
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with serious business
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posted August 08, 2009 04:01 PM |
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Beating is stupid. Plain and simple. Kids won't learn to behave, they will learn to BE AFRAID which is a big difference.
What you need is to deprive them of everything you give them. You can even cut the electricity or something. No pocket money or anything like that. They will learn that they need to behave to get those things.
I mean how many of those pro-beating actually DRAW A LINE? How far is far enough? Why not torture the kid? On what exactly do you base off this "line" and what is it, precisely speaking?
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted August 08, 2009 05:35 PM |
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yeah, deprive them of food
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angelito
Honorable
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proud father of a princess
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posted August 08, 2009 05:43 PM |
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Quote:
Might I ask how many of you have raised children, anyway?
I have to underline that. But it is very well known, people who do NOT have kids think they are the better parents..
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Cepheus
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Far-flung Keeper
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posted August 08, 2009 05:47 PM |
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Honestly, if I ever come across anybody attacking a child, I'll attack them. Dealing with terrorist brats is one thing, I can understand that, but I also understand that violence breeds violence. I used to babysit and I know there are ways to deal with people half your age/size which don't involve mindlessly slapping them about.
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"Those who forget their history are inevitably doomed to repeat it." —Proverb, Might and Magic VIII
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Azagal
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Smooth Snake
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posted August 08, 2009 05:50 PM |
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Quote:
Quote:
Might I ask how many of you have raised children, anyway?
I have to underline that. But it is very well known, people who do NOT have kids think they are the better parents..
I don't really know where you get the air of sarcasm from but having children isn't neccesary for one to understand that children can be raised without the use of violence. Why exactly would I need a child or children to make the point?
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xerdux
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
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posted August 08, 2009 05:53 PM |
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Well, I am not a brat terrorist IRL (Internet doesn't count) and people from like Poland would probably consider all children in Sweden spoiled.
And what's the logic in;
"- Stupid kid, dont hit your parents! *Mother slaps the Kid herself*" >.>
And spanking? Wtf, are you RAPING the children now or what? -.-
Oh well - im not suprsied - many people on HC seem to live in Kazakstan!
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TheDeath
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
with serious business
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posted August 08, 2009 06:07 PM |
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Quote:
Quote:
Might I ask how many of you have raised children, anyway?
I have to underline that. But it is very well known, people who do NOT have kids think they are the better parents..
The most important thing is for you to be THE KID, not the parent. I think everyone was a kid. 
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Cepheus
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Far-flung Keeper
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posted August 08, 2009 06:18 PM |
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Sorry Azagal, I meant no sarcasm or offence. It's just that the word that flashed into my mind when I read through this thread was "theorycrafting".
A lot of people are claiming "this works, that works" or "that never works" or "nothing non-violent works in practice". I'm certain automatically that they're all absolutely wrong because children are different and there are multiple ways to handle each one. So when I look at these posts I get sidetracked and become interested in seeing who's credible and who isn't, i.e. who has spent more time around kids (as an adult, TheDeath!) and knows what they're talking about. And if you're a parent it's fair to say you're on the higher end of that spectrum.
Talking about children's rights is a pretty different matter. I'm totally against physically attacking children in almost every way other than restraint (i.e. if they attack you), as I guess my post conveyed.
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"Those who forget their history are inevitably doomed to repeat it." —Proverb, Might and Magic VIII
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JoonasTo
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted August 08, 2009 07:45 PM |
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I have watched by a lot of relatives growing up since I'm from the older end of my generation in our family. I'm also one of the few who has received corporal punishment. Besides of two spoiled brats everyone else has turned out a lot better than me(and the two brats are yet to see). Most of the other kids around here were not suspectible to corporal punishment either, only a few. We who received corporal punishment are clearly less stable people than those who didn't. Go figure.
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mvassilev
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posted August 08, 2009 08:04 PM |
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted August 08, 2009 08:22 PM |
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what do you mean by turning out good?
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