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Heroes Community > Other Side of the Monitor > Thread: Pornography
Thread: Pornography This thread is 6 pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 6 · NEXT»
bixie
bixie


Promising
Legendary Hero
my common sense is tingling!
posted August 20, 2010 10:21 AM

Pornography

NO PICS PLEASE!!!!!

I just want to ask what people think of pornography? any particular enjoyment, does it do anything for you? or do you hate it, or think it's immoral or corrupting the youth of country X?
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DagothGares
DagothGares


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
posted August 20, 2010 10:34 AM

I don't know about you, but I think that the censorship on pornography in Japan only made things a lot worse (the origins of tentacle rape hail from their inability to portray penises in their pornography). How about you guys?

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SKPRIMUS
SKPRIMUS


Promising
Supreme Hero
The One and the Prime
posted August 20, 2010 10:56 AM

You're asking this quesiton on thw interweb?
[emjoy in private & don't pre-judge ohers if no harm done]
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too many idiots in VW
"to lose is to win, and he who wins shall lose"
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JollyJoker
JollyJoker


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
posted August 20, 2010 11:08 AM

I think that this is a very complex issue.

I think it is important that people make their experiences with sex UNINFLUENCED from acted-out display of the matter nd not vice versa, and the current situation is obviously endangering it. It may not be best when kids without individual experiences watch all kinds of unauthentic ACTED stuff.

Apart from that, heck,  watching people eat may be a QUITE disgusting experience, and if THAT isn't forbidden, well.

So this is adult-only stuff, like drugs, and as usual society somewhat goes eiher out of their way to forbid it and criminalizing it or allow it, but then fail to restrict access properly.

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Doomforge
Doomforge


Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
posted August 20, 2010 11:17 AM

Porn is a massive waste of time. It also de-sensitizes people. People need more. a 12yo boy who has never seen porn before will be aroused by mere naked breasts. Give him porn and after a while (this may vary ofc, might be years), "soft" turn-ups won't even affect him. And that's bad. Especially if he also has a problem finding a sexual partner later. The simpler stuff turns people on, the better. My friend found himself addicted to BDSM porn. And guess what, in real life, he found "normal" attractions kinda... lacking. Which turned out a massive frustration (people who would do hardcore unacted BDSM probably exist, but yeah, go and find one being an unattractive 17yo guy ). That would be avoided entirely if he never watched porn.

In conclusion: it does only harm, and no good at all.




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Moonlith
Moonlith


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
If all else fails, use Fiyah!
posted August 20, 2010 11:25 AM

Quote:
I don't know about you, but I think that the censorship on pornography in Japan only made things a lot worse (the origins of tentacle rape hail from their inability to portray penises in their pornography).

.... How is that a bad thing? No, seriously? What's wrong with tentacle hentai?

Personally plain pornography doesn't do much for me, it's boring.

Corrupting youths? Pffft get real. It's primal instinct. MTV is far more likely to make men think of women as objects.
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wog_edn
wog_edn

Promising

The Nothingness
posted August 20, 2010 11:30 AM

Personally I don't care much for porn, as I prefer the real thing. But sure, it's a nice way for younger ones to pick up an idea or two
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angelito
angelito


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
proud father of a princess
posted August 20, 2010 11:44 AM

Quote:
Porn is a massive waste of time. It also de-sensitizes people. People need more. a 12yo boy who has never seen porn before will be aroused by mere naked breasts. Give him porn and after a while (this may vary ofc, might be years), "soft" turn-ups won't even affect him. And that's bad. Especially if he also has a problem finding a sexual partner later. The simpler stuff turns people on, the better. My friend found himself addicted to BDSM porn. And guess what, in real life, he found "normal" attractions kinda... lacking. Which turned out a massive frustration (people who would do hardcore unacted BDSM probably exist, but yeah, go and find one being an unattractive 17yo guy ). That would be avoided entirely if he never watched porn.

In conclusion: it does only harm, and no good at all.

So you say every (or most) male persons who watch porn won't find (real) naked breasts attractive anymore?

Epic fail
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Doomforge
Doomforge


Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
posted August 20, 2010 11:54 AM
Edited by Doomforge at 11:54, 20 Aug 2010.

I never use "every" or "all" because people differ. I hate generalizing.

Thing is, some people DO get de-sensitized. Myself included. And is it good? nope, not really. If there is, say, a 20% chance of getting desensitized over years, I say it's not worth it. It doesn't need to be like that for everyone, but, you know, the risk is too big

Makes sex much less of an EXPERIENCE. Which is.. kind of sad, actually.
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Fauch
Fauch


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted August 20, 2010 11:58 AM
Edited by Fauch at 12:05, 20 Aug 2010.

Quote:
I just want to ask what people think of pornography?

what exactly do you call pornography? that may ranges from women simply showing their breasts to pedophilia. for example, if you consider something as pornography as long as there is nudity involved, then I could say there is a lot of bullsnow, but you can also find some true artists

Quote:
any particular enjoyment, does it do anything for you?

depends, if the people seem to enjoy what they are doing, I think it's cool. but not when they are emotionless or faking it

Quote:
or do you hate it, or think it's immoral or corrupting the youth of country X?

lol, that would be judging a bit fast. I think, as long as people working in that field are happy with what they do, there's no problems. I don't think porn is necessarily corrupting but could be. if you approach it with a set of ideas and expectations about it, it will be corrupting, actually, it's rather the beliefs about sex which are corrupting, rather than porn.

depending on how you are conditionned, it can as well be dangerous or harmless.

you may set the most shocking stuffs aside, better to keep them for a warned audience, but the basic porn is probably not dangerous by itself.

Quote:
Porn is a massive waste of time.

it is true of a lots of things and even of which are usually considered useful or necessary.
and isn't life a waste of time too?

Quote:
It also de-sensitizes people

it's also true of about anything, if you keep on doing something you may get bored. look around you, on average, people aren't very sensitive. they are on some rare occasions, but that's it, and they aren't all addicted to porn.

Quote:
Then, the other part of the problem is sex, and why sex has become so important. Why has this urge taken such a hold on you? Have you ever thought it out? You have not thought it out, because you have just indulged; you have not searched out why there is this problem. Sirs, why is there this problem? And what happens when you deal with it by suppressing it completely - you know, the ideal of Brahmacharya, and so on? What happens? It is still there. You resent anybody who talks about a woman, and you think that you can succeed in completely suppressing the sexual urge in yourself and solve your problem that way; but you are haunted by it. It is like living in a house and putting all your ugly things in one room; but they are still there. So, discipline is not going to solve this problem - discipline being sublimation, suppression, substitution - , because you have tried it, and that is not the way out. So, what is the way out? The way out is to understand the problem, and to understand is not to condemn or justify. Let us look at it, then, in that way.

Why has sex become so important a problem in your life? Is not the sexual act, the feeling, a way of self-forgetfulness? Do you understand what I mean? In that act there is complete fusion; at that moment there is complete cessation of all conflict, you feel supremely happy because you no longer feel the need as a separate entity and you are not consumed with fear. That is, for a moment there is an ending of self-consciousness, and you feel the clarity of self-forgetfulness, the joy of self abnegation. So, sex has become important because in every other direction you are living a life of conflict, of self-aggrandizement and frustration. Sirs, look at your lives, political, social, religious: you are striving to become something. Politically, you want to be somebody, powerful, to have position, prestige. Don't look at somebody else, don't look at the ministers. If you were given all that, you would do the same thing. So, politically, you are striving to become somebody, you are expanding yourself, are you not? Therefore, you are creating conflict, there is no denial, there is no abnegation of the `me'. On the contrary, there is accentuation of the `me'. The same process goes on in your relationship with things, which is ownership of property, and again in the religion that you follow. There is no meaning in what you are doing, in your religious practices. You just believe, you cling to labels, words. If you observe, you will see that there too there is no freedom from the consciousness of the `me' as the centre. Though your religion says, `Forget yourself', your very process is the assertion of yourself, you are still the important entity. You may read the Gita or the Bible, but you are still the minister, you are still the exploiter, sucking the people and building temples.

So, in every field, in every activity, you are indulging and emphasizing yourself, your importance, your prestige, your security. Therefore, there is only one source of self-forgetfulness, which is sex, and that is why the woman or the man becomes all-important to you, and why you must possess. So, you build a society which enforces that possession, guarantees you that possession; and naturally sex becomes the all-important problem when everywhere else the self is the important thing. And do you think, Sirs, that one can live in that state without contradiction, without misery, without frustration? But when there is honestly and sincerely no self-emphasis, whether in religion or in social activity, then sex has very little meaning. It is because you are afraid to be as nothing, politically, socially, religiously, that sex becomes a problem; but if in all these things you allowed yourself to diminish, to be the less, you would see that sex becomes no problem at all.

There is chastity only when there is love. When there is love, the problem of sex ceases; and without love, to pursue the ideal of Brahmacharya is an absurdity, because the ideal is unreal. The real is that which you are; and if you don't understand your own mind, the workings of your own mind, you will not understand sex, because sex is a thing of the mind. The problem is not simple. It needs, not mere habit-forming practices, but tremendous thought and enquiry into your relationship with people, with property and with ideas. Sir, it means you have to undergo strenuous searching of your heart and mind, thereby bringing a transformation within yourself. Love is chaste; and when there is love, and not the mere idea of chastity created by the mind, then sex has lost its problem and has quite a different meaning.

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Doomforge
Doomforge


Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
posted August 20, 2010 12:07 PM
Edited by Doomforge at 12:07, 20 Aug 2010.

Quote:
it is true of a lots of things and even of which are usually considered useful or necessary.
and isn't life a waste of time too?


Thing is, porn is counterproductive. You may have your little pleasure, but it's going to affect your tastes if overdosed.

Quote:
it's also true of about anything, if you keep on doing something you may get bored. look around you, on average, people aren't very sensitive. they are on some rare occasions, but that's it, and they aren't all addicted to porn.


The real problem here is the taste-shift. In regular sex, if you get "bored" then probably you just need to spice things up. In porn, you move to the next "tier" of porn. Much as my friend did, you may end up in area which cannot be in any ways transmitted to real life. And that is pitiful. If you suddenly notice that you are turned on by something bizzare or gross, you may find "ordinary" sex boring, much as my friend did.

Things like "scat" grew big not because a big chunk of our population is secretly cophrophiles, I guess, but because people decided to pursuit something new, powerful arousal. And went to the "poo" tier. Well, you may say that it's impossible to go from plain soft porn to gross things like scat, but I made a lot of research on forums and in real life talking to people about it, and they all claimed to be moving "up the ladder" in terms of porn watched. From softest to gross.

That's not what you want to do with your life, trust me. Unless you want frustration to follow.
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JollyJoker
JollyJoker


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
posted August 20, 2010 12:17 PM

I don't think, that is true, Doomforge. If your friend is turned on by "unreal" BDSM and "now" not by straight sex anymore, he wouldn't have been turned on by straight sex anyway, at least not as much as the next guy. Or do you think, watcching a gay porn will make otherwise straight people gay?

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Fauch
Fauch


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted August 20, 2010 12:21 PM
Edited by Fauch at 12:22, 20 Aug 2010.

that's true of most things, you get bored, so you look for something more exciting, you get bored again... and in the end you are stuck because you can't find anything better.

Quote:
but I made a lot of research on forums and in real life talking to people about it, and they all claimed to be moving "up the ladder" in terms of porn watched. From softest to gross.

do you mean they don't get excited anymore by soft stuffs and need really gross stuffs?

I've seen a bit of everything too, but I still prefer soft stuffs overall, young pretty girls enjoying theirselves, looking alive, not like the zombies you see in some porns.

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Doomforge
Doomforge


Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
posted August 20, 2010 12:23 PM
Edited by Doomforge at 12:25, 20 Aug 2010.

JJ: I'm not him, so I can't answer that question well.

Seeing how my tastes shifted though, I am certain that long-term porn watching indeed DOES makes us more, well, interested in "sex alternatives".

And life is better when it's simple. No? It's a good parallel. If somebody is happy without a yacht, golden doorknobs and newest ferrari, he doesn't have to make so much effort in his life to be happy.

If someone doesn't need the best hi-fi set to call the music he hears "the clearest he has ever heard", he may be "handicapped", but many sound experts will admit they are sort of jealous of that. Because they wouldn't need to pay those absurd prices for the best set to match their requirements.

With sex, I think it's similar. If plain old missionary is all you need to feel satisfaction, it should stay that way. The simpler things make us happy, the better - because simple things are easy to get, don't require as much effort and so on.

Quote:
do you mean they don't get excited anymore by soft stuffs and need really gross stuffs?


Yeah, that's what happens to some guys.
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Moonlith
Moonlith


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
If all else fails, use Fiyah!
posted August 20, 2010 12:35 PM
Edited by Moonlith at 12:41, 20 Aug 2010.

Quote:
Thing is, porn is counterproductive. You may have your little pleasure, but it's going to affect your tastes if overdosed.

No, not at all. The truth is that most people are hardly aware what it is that actually excites them. They may notice a particular oddity gets them excited, but they have no clue why or where it came from. That doesn't mean it GREW on them; it was already there and they simply discovered it. You cannot change what you are turned on by. If you could, Pedophiles could be cured. Which is obviously not the case. And no, it is not a disease.

Quote:
The real problem here is the taste-shift. In regular sex, if you get "bored" then probably you just need to spice things up. In porn, you move to the next "tier" of porn. Much as my friend did, you may end up in area which cannot be in any ways transmitted to real life. And that is pitiful. If you suddenly notice that you are turned on by something bizzare or gross, you may find "ordinary" sex boring, much as my friend did.

Nobody gets bored of sex. I don't think your friend's tastes shifted, he merely started doing the regular because that it is considered 'normal', but that doesn't mean he was into it. He just didn't know about other options. The moment he went on to explore alternatives, he found those much more to his liking. Again, he did not change, it was already there and he simply discovered it.

Quote:
Things like "scat" grew big not because a big chunk of our population is secretly cophrophiles, I guess, but because people decided to pursuit something new, powerful arousal. And went to the "poo" tier. Well, you may say that it's impossible to go from plain soft porn to gross things like scat, but I made a lot of research on forums and in real life talking to people about it, and they all claimed to be moving "up the ladder" in terms of porn watched. From softest to gross.

Doesn't mean they actually get turned on by the 'scat' element itself. You'll find that many sexual situations contain a variety of elements, each of which capable of turning someone on. I personally call it the difference between a "scene" and the "kink" behind it. For example, someone might find the idea sexy of being peed on... But that doesn't mean he has a kink for watersports neccessarily, it could simply be that he has a kink for humiliation, and urine being one of many tools to be humiliated. That doesn't mean he is turned on by urine itself, though.

What you enjoy sexually is hard-coded, either from birth or from your development in younger years, nobody is certain about that. What is certain though, is that once it is written, it cannot be changed. But rest assured by the time you start pubering, it is already well-written and deeply engraved.

People don't just "get into scat", if they get into it, they are merely discovering that they are sexually turned on by it. Your friend's tastes aren't shifting, he is just realizing the things that turn him on, things he didn't know about before. That's the reason why people experiment. Personally I don't think there is ANYONE who is merely turned on by vanilla sex exclusively, everyone has at least ONE odd kink.

It should also be noted there is nothing wrong with "gross" or "weird" or even "dangerous" sexual fantasies. A foot fetish is a harmless kink, but other kinks can be gross to majorities (such as scat) or even harmful (pedophilia, murder).

The problem though lies not with those kinks; it lies with people who are unable to distinguish between fantasy and reality. There isn't anything wrong with having sexual fantasies about feet, scat, kids, or even murder, as long as you understand that it is okay to bring feet into reality because it is innocent, scat is in a grey area (health issues), and kids and murder are obviously not okay; should remain in fantasy and never be brought into reality.

Quote:
Quote:
do you mean they don't get excited anymore by soft stuffs and need really gross stuffs?

Yeah, that's what happens to some guys.

They weren't turned on by the soft stuff to begin with. At a basic level perhaps, since physical contact generally is stimulating, but not because they had fantasies about it. They just didn't know there were alternative things that turned them on.
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Fauch
Fauch


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted August 20, 2010 12:40 PM

right, but can you grow bored of something simple?

and let's say someone claim he doesn't need more than the simpler stuffs. you give him what he needs to afford the best stuffs. don't you think he is going to choose something better than the simpler stuff?

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Moonlith
Moonlith


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
If all else fails, use Fiyah!
posted August 20, 2010 12:45 PM
Edited by Moonlith at 12:47, 20 Aug 2010.

Quote:
right, but can you grow bored of something simple?

Depends on the person. I believe in general "kink" is used to describe an oddity that turns you on, whereas a "fetish" is technically defined as something you NEED in order to get aroused. If you want to talk truely hardcore, people with a foot fetish for example don't get really aroused unless there is -some- form of footplay in their sex. Not entirely true I think because again, physical contact is still stimulating.

But I believe it's about mental stimulation as well. Your body can get aroused from simple vanilla sex (oral and mating), but that doesn't neccessarily mean the act stimulates your mind. In terms of fetishes, I don't think there is mental stimulation without the involvement of the particular fetish.

Quote:
and let's say someone claim he doesn't need more than the simpler stuffs. you give him what he needs to afford the best stuffs. don't you think he is going to choose something better than the simpler stuff?

That's a bit too vague What exactly do you mean? What's "better" really depends on a person's personal desires.
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Doomforge
Doomforge


Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
posted August 20, 2010 12:52 PM

Quote:
No, not at all. The truth is that most people are hardly aware what it is that actually excites them.


I think it should stay that way.

If you have a thing for little boys and never discover it, it's for the best.

If humiliation turns you on, it will make your life less frustrating in the sex zone if you're not aware of it.

Porn makes it obvious what turns you on; especially the kind that focuses around the fetishes. So... isn't it better not to know them? tell me

Quote:
Nobody gets bored of sex.


Unless you have been doing same missionary position with a cold wife for 20 years. In such case, boredom seems to follow often...

Quote:
I don't think your friend's tastes shifted, he merely started doing the regular because that it is considered 'normal', but that doesn't mean he was into it. He just didn't know about other options. The moment he went on to explore alternatives, he found those much more to his liking. Again, he did not change, it was already there and he simply discovered it.


It's more of a semantic play whether we consider it a "shift" or "discovery". Either way, it give him nothing short of frustration because fantasies impossible to fulfill = frustration. And how many girls do you know who would like to engage in extreme BDSM? Surely there are some, but if you meet a nice girl, enjoy talking to her, spending time with her, get into relationship, have sex and notice she doesn't even consider BDSM as an option, would you dump her just because of that? I guess that would be stupid. But that also mean unless you want to cheat on her, you can't really fulfill those kinky desires The conclusion is that it's better NOT to know until you can actually try that in real life. Which is most often impossible.

Quote:
Doesn't mean they actually get turned on by the 'scat' lement itself. You'll find that many sexual situations contains a variety of elements, each of which capable of turning someone on. I personally call it the difference between a "scene" and the "kink" behind it. For example, someone might find the idea sexy of being peed on... But that doesn't mean he has a kink for watersports neccessarily, it could simply be that he has a kink for humiliation, and urine being one of many tools to be humiliated. That doesn't mean he is turned on by urine itself, though.


That is also true but again, whether he discovered it or things shifted, doesn't change the fact that it would be better for him not to know.

Quote:
What you enjoy sexually is hard-coded, either from birth or from your development in younger years, nobody is certain about that. What is certain though, is that once it is written, it cannot be changed. But rest assured by the time you start pubering, it is already well-written and deeply engraved.

People don't just "get into scat", if they get into it, they are merely discovering that they are sexually turned on by it. Your friend's tastes aren't shifting, he is just realizing the things that turn him on, things he didn't know about before. That's the reason why people experiment. Personally I don't think there is ANYONE who is merely turned on by vanilla sex exclusively, everyone has at least ONE odd kink.


I don't agree that your tastes can't shift. Mine did. What I considered gross 10 years ago seems cool to me now. I never "discovered" anything; it just happened gradually.

Fortunately I have a perverted GF, so I'm not really frustrated about it. but come on, that was pure luck. If she was "normal", I would really regret watching those stupid movies.

Quote:
It should also be noted there is nothing wrong with "gross" or "weird" or even "dangerous" sexual fantasies. A foot fetish is a harmless kink, but other kinks can be gross to majorities (such as scat) or even harmful (pedophilia, murder).

The problem though lies not with those kinks; it lies with people who are unable to distinguish between fantasy and reality. There isn't anything wrong with having sexual fantasies about feet, scat, kids, or even murder, as long as you understand that it is okay to bring feet into reality because it is innocent, scat is in a grey area (health issues), and kids and murder are obviously not okay; should remain in fantasy and never be brought into reality.


Well, yes, but my main point is that realizing those fantasies means FINDING a person that shares them, and it is very difficult (obviously unless it's THAT type of relationship, you don't start with "hi, my name is John, I'm into scat" - you discover each other's tastes after a good while, usually). Saves you the frustration of inability if you simply don't know. Or try to discover things with your partner together, instead of creating a illusion on the screen.
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Fauch
Fauch


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted August 20, 2010 01:06 PM

Quote:
The truth is that most people are hardly aware what it is that actually excites them.

that's probably true

Quote:
Nobody gets bored of sex. I don't think your friend's tastes shifted, he merely started doing the regular because that it is considered 'normal', but that doesn't mean he was into it. He just didn't know about other options. The moment he went on to explore alternatives, he found those much more to his liking. Again, he did not change, it was already there and he simply discovered it.

maybe...

Quote:
What you enjoy sexually is hard-coded, either from birth or from your development in younger years, nobody is certain about that. What is certain though, is that once it is written, it cannot be changed. But rest assured by the time you start pubering, it is already well-written and deeply engraved.

I doubt that, and certainly not from birth. maybe conditioning, but that can be undone.

Quote:
It should also be noted there is nothing wrong with "gross" or "weird" or even "dangerous" sexual fantasies. A foot fetish is a harmless kink, but other kinks can be gross to majorities (such as scat) or even harmful (pedophilia, murder).

The problem though lies not with those kinks; it lies with people who are unable to distinguish between fantasy and reality. There isn't anything wrong with having sexual fantasies about feet, scat, kids, or even murder, as long as you understand that it is okay to bring feet into reality because it is innocent, scat is in a grey area (health issues), and kids and murder are obviously not okay; should remain in fantasy and never be brought into reality.

agreed. who cares if something is gross to majorities as long as it is harmless?

Quote:
Well, yes, but my main point is that realizing those fantasies means FINDING a person that shares them, and it is very difficult

it is also possible they share them but will not admit it, because they think it would make themselves not respectable.
people do that all the time, in order to look respectable and gain a good position in society, they deny who they really are and do what they think other people expect from them.

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del_diablo
del_diablo


Legendary Hero
Manifest
posted August 20, 2010 01:11 PM

Quote:
I don't know about you, but I think that the censorship on pornography in Japan only made things a lot worse (the origins of tentacle rape hail from their inability to portray penises in their pornography). How about you guys?


Do not drag in japan, they are the worst case example of sexualisation.
But we could always discuss them.


Pornography in itself is "not bad", the real question is "how much?". The exact moment it is allowed to overflow, to the point where it starts affecting society too much is the moment it has gone too far.
The line is subjective as always, but I think its easy to locate if we ignore drawing the line in a precise manner.
By ignoring precise I mean to do it "roughly", at the least as a starting pinpoint, in contrast to drawing the line and risking its wrongly drawn.

If we look on it from another angle: One heck of a drug eh?
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