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| Thread: Thats it AZAGAL! |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 · «PREV |
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Corribus
Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
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posted April 02, 2011 04:45 PM |
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I've spoken my mind and don't have much more to say on the subject, except to address this:
@selcy
Quote:
I have read some of the older threads and people seemed to have more of a community spirit and worked on things together and even did those strange things called communicating and team work, wow how unusual.
Yes, we did have more of a community spirit. We had a good time but we also still managed to treat each other respectfully. As much as I hesitate to pump up his ego, I think we could look to blizzardboy as the sort of model poster in terms of keeping things light-hearted but also knowing when he's gone too far. I've no doubt in my mind (absolutely none) that if bboy really felt he had offended someone or hurt their feelings, he'd be the first person to step in and make amends. Yeah, he pushes against the boundary of crass and jerkiness at times but he knows exactly when to back off or apologize. There's a definite art form to that, and I applaud him for mastering it. He was involved in this joke, but I didn't see him starting a whole thread dedicated specifically to making fun of the people who fell for it.
For what it's worth, I stepped in last night because I saw a community member here, one I happen to like, being the brunt of a joke and trying his best to convey how much it hurt his feelings, and people were essentially spitting in his face about it. I know Azagal can take care of himself, but to my mind being a community (having community spirit, as selcy put it) is about supporting each other when they're having a down moment.
As for Aculias, he seems to have a big problem with me because I like to read books and talk about politics. That's fine. If that's the biggest thing about me he can find to criticize then I'll take it as a compliment.
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Corribus
Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
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posted April 02, 2011 05:21 PM |
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Edited by Corribus at 17:30, 02 Apr 2011.
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By the way, as a general comment I'd like to point out that HC is an international community that has people from a very wide range of cultures. Different cultures treat humor very differently. While Americans might go around insulting each others' mothers and think it's very funny, this might be quite insulting somewhere else.
I know that Azagal lives in Japan, which is fortuitous because I can share a personal story that taught me a very hard lesson about the delicacy of humor. In graduate school I worked very closely with a nice Japanese fellow who left his home country to study here in the US. I actually very much liked the guy. He was friendly and, like many Japanese, he possessed a sense of honor unlike anything you'll find here in the US.
As it turned out, this person absolutely hated to be touched. I suppose this has something to do with Japanese culture. They don't hug and show a lot of outward emotions, particularly between men (I guess all that bowing they do in the movies is authentic). They don't even really like to shake hands. Which of course I and the other guys where I worked found endlessly amusing. So at every opportunity we hugged the guy and pretended like we were feeling him up. Smacked him on the ass, that sort of thing.
He hated it. He told us all the time that it made him uncomfortable, and that he didn't like people touching him, but that just made it a lot more funny, so we did it more and more often. We laughed in his face about it, and when he got upset we told him it was just a joke and he shouldn't take it so seriously. Ha, ha, ha, right? Guy should just get a sense of humor, right?
Well, apparently we made him so miserable that he quit his studies and went back to Japan.
So there you have it. Why didn't I just listen to him when he told us that he didn't find our jokes funny? Why did we try to make him feel bad for not having a sense of humor? We were such snows and so culturally insensitive that we were making his stay here in the US a nightmare. All in the name of "humor".
I've always felt bad about that, because I did really like the guy. We weren't joking around to be mean - we really thought it was funny. I wish I could take all that back, but I can't. Yet it did teach me a valuable lesson. Sometimes what we think is funny is not funny at all to the people we are messing around with. And when they tell us about it, we should listen to them and stop it immediately.
I think this is especially something that is good to keep in mind when joking around with people of other cultures, which is invariably the case in an online community.
Well, that's it. Maybe it will help explain why I was so affected by this thread.
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ohforfsake
Promising
Legendary Hero
Initiate
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posted April 02, 2011 05:38 PM |
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Dear Corribus. I do not know your personally, and I can not say much about how you are outside of HC.
However, from what I have seen, you have matured into one damn fine man. I understand you feel bad about the event. I am sure we all have stuff like that we feel bad about. I personally remember this crippled kid, who I befriended. Most of all, because no one else wanted to. We had lots of fun, then I got strange and we parted on bad friendship.
We are all young once. No one is born as the wonder they might grew up to be. I think it's a very usual feature among young men to not be able to prioritize very well. Not being able to see how a single moment of fun might not be a good idea, when on the long run, a friendship and a persons comfort, might be at stake.
All I can say, is that I urge you not to dwell on this. Clearly you have learned from the experience, which is probably some of the best one can hope for.
If anything, please consider that the education was not worth it enough to this guy, that he'd endure what you did to him. Maybe it also tells something about how he felt about the education itself, and not only his "friends".
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Living time backwards
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Corribus
Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
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posted April 02, 2011 05:53 PM |
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Aculias
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
Pretty Boy Angel Sacraficer
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posted April 02, 2011 06:17 PM |
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Alright Corribus, if you have to make yourself look better by personally attacking me before & making yourself look better by making me a typical American, that is fine.
I am not like my younger self, I wont argue anymore.
I had enough arguments in my time in the past with typical haters just like you. Where only people with your interests are what counts.
I dont know if you are American or studying out here from another country.
All good, I debated long enough in political areas from the years past. I guess it just gets old after years of doing it.
I would never compete in chemistry with ya, as it states your a chemist.
For the record I wanted to make an example & saw Tortillas in about 2 seconds lol.
If you want to keep insulting me, go ahead I wont reply to it anymore...
I guess I just dont want to anymore...
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Dreaming of a Better World
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