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| Thread: Heroes related jokes! |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 · NEXT» |
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 02, 2002 04:20 AM |
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Heroes related jokes!
A Titan and a wolf stop to take a snow in the forest.
The Titan turns to the wolf and says "Do you ever have trouble with the snow sticking to your fur?"
The wolf answers "No!"
So the titan wiped his ass with the wolf!
I will be posting all the best jokes on to a Heroes Joke Page for prosperity.
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Lupin
Known Hero
who eats Titans for Lunch
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posted June 02, 2002 05:54 AM |
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OK, that was disturbing...
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The Druid among dragons.
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Dajek
Known Hero
Psychedelic Knight
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posted June 02, 2002 06:32 PM |
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A bit twisted... But not bad~!
take this one:
A faerie and a pikemen are having a conversation. Suddenlu the faery starts picking on the pikeman`s purple outfit. The pikeman says: "I may wear purple clothes, but You are the true faerie here." Ha ha, no that`s a BAD joke...
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Stalefish
Bad-mannered
Adventuring Hero
Hero for Hire
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posted June 02, 2002 08:09 PM |
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he elric! do you have more? i reallt liked that one!
lol
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buffness
Tavern Dweller
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posted June 03, 2002 04:50 AM |
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actually i thought it was funny mate
haway the lads!
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PhoebeDuViels
Known Hero
Que?
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posted June 03, 2002 08:11 AM |
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Quote:
A bit twisted... But not bad~!
take this one:
A faerie and a pikemen are having a conversation. Suddenlu the faery starts picking on the pikeman`s purple outfit. The pikeman says: "I may wear purple clothes, but You are the true faerie here." Ha ha, no that`s a BAD joke...
What? Oh...I see. That was suppose to be a joke...
Okay..haha...
*Phoebe Du Viels go to the bathroom and starts to puke*
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CENSORED MATERIAL NOT APPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN !
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Aculias
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
Pretty Boy Angel Sacraficer
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posted June 03, 2002 09:59 AM |
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Quote:
OK, that was disturbing...
You are so boring, you some how some way gotta get some kind of sense of humor yes no.
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Dreaming of a Better World
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 04, 2002 02:12 AM |
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Quote:
he elric! do you have more? i reallt liked that one!
lol
A sad Unicorn walks into a tavern and orders an ale.
The barman asks "Why the long face?"
The Unicorn answers "Well I am a horse!"
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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RMS
Responsible
Legendary Hero
-ing yummy foods
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posted June 04, 2002 02:34 AM |
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...is it my turn now?
...ok
....well er...um hmm
Once upon a tale...long long ago...longer than that...yeah.
...there was this guy and then there a bunch of other guys.
I remember distinctly that we were all there with them...and then there was this thing...and something happenned...
...then um yeah- they began to go, with me and them and you and they all. Then...together they all went and did the stuff. Then, when they were done they came back from there and did the regular stuff the you and I and them would do when you get back, you know?
...and then, um...well yeah.
...hmm, what were we talking about again?
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This space for rent.
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MightyMage
Honorable
Legendary Hero
of INSANITY and DELICIOUSNESS
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posted June 05, 2002 02:29 AM |
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It's those people again isn't it RMS
Anyway, Here's my joke:
There were these two heroes out walking their pets, one with a hell hound and the other with a goblin, when they smelled somthing delicious coming from a nearby tavern.
The hero with the hell houd says to the other, "let's go over to that tavern and get somthing to eat." The hero with the goblin says, "We can't go in there, we have creatures with us."
The Hero with the hell hound says, "Just follow my lead." He puts on a pair of dark glasses and walks into the tavern, when the owner comes up and replies, "sorry pal, no pets allowed."
The guy with the Hell hound replies, " you don't understand. This is my seeing eye creature."
The owner, skeptical, says, "a Hell hound?"
The Hounds owner says, "yes, there using them now-they're very good and protect me from thieves too." The man at the door says, "come on in."
When the man with the goblin sees this, he puts on a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk in. Once again the tavern owner says, "sorry pal, no pets allowed." The hero with the goblin says, "You don't understand, this is my seeing eye creature."
"A goblin?" says the owner.
The man with the goblin replies, "A goblin? They gave me a goblin?!"
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Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage. For he is all I could ever
want to be! - OhforfSake
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 05, 2002 03:17 AM |
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Craghack walks into a bar with a Harpy and a Leprechaun.
The leprechaun says "I'll have a pint of ale and he's paying!" pointing to the hero.
Craghack unwillingly pays for the drink and also buys for himself.
A little later the leprechaun hammers on the bar and says again "I'll have a pint of ale and he's paying!" pointing to the hero.
Again Craghack pays for the round of drinks.
This goes on for sometime until the Leprechaun goes to relieve himself.
The barman asks "What's the story, how come you come in here with a Harpy and a Leprechaun and buy all the drinks?"
Craghack replies "Well I got two wishes from a Genie and I wished for a bird with long legs and a small tight ****!"
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Avallach
Hired Hero
Disputo ergo sum.
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posted June 05, 2002 12:36 PM |
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Three Heroes were adventuring together, Astral the Wizard, Caitlin the Cleric, and Clancy the Ranger. Entering a cave one day they found three lamps. On the first lamp was written the name 'Jeddite', on the second the name 'Alamar', while the third was blank.
Astral, knowing the ways of such things, took the first lamp and gave it a rub. There was a puff of smoke and Jeddite appeared from the lamp. He declared that through his powerful magic he could resurrect a single creature of Astral's naming, who had lived at any time in the past. Astral, who valued Wisdom highly, named the greatest Philosopher who had ever lived. Jeddite cast his Ressurection spell, and the greatest ever Philosopher came to life before them, after which Jeddite and his lamp disappeared.
Caitlin, thinking this was wonderful, took the second lamp in her hands and rubbed it. This time Alamar appeared, and he too declared that through his powerful magic he could resurrect a single creature that had lived at any time in the past. Caitlin, who knew the value of Intelligence, named the greatest man of Science who had ever lived. Alamar duly cast Resurrection, and the greatest ever Scientist was returned to life there in the cave. Alamar and his lamp disappeared.
Clancy, seeing that there was one lamp left, took this and rubbed it. The unnamed Hero of the lamp appeared, and to the surprise of Astral and Caitlin he informed Clancy that through his powerful magic he could resurrect two creatures that had ever lived. How, wondered Astral and Caitlin, could anyone possibly be more skilled at Resurrection than Jeddite and Alamar? Clancy was unperturbed though, and knowing the value of the bond between man and beast, he named his two pet hamsters that had recently perished. The unnamed Hero heard this and nodded, then turned to regard all of those who were in the cave. He nodded again, smiled, and then cast Sacrifice on the greatest ever Philosopher and Scientist....
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"Death slew him not, but he made death his ladder to the skies"
- Edmund Spenser, on the death of Philip Sidney
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Maniac
Disgraceful
Famous Hero
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posted June 05, 2002 08:18 PM |
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Hehe...
Why did the leprechaun cross the road?
Because a horny ogre was looking for him...again.
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phYscHo
Known Hero
[This space For Rent]
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posted June 05, 2002 09:22 PM |
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face it people heroes just isn't a funny game
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I can Imagine a world without hate, a world that lives in total peace and harmony, then i can imagine us attacking them, cos the fools wouldn't expect it
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Damacon_Ace
Famous Hero
Also known as Nobris Agni
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posted June 07, 2002 03:37 AM |
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Yeah, psYchO, it isn't, but neither is your brain funny! It is completely dead!
Here's a comic catchpoem:
One day Sandro the Necromancer decided to join his friends Nagash and Finneas Vilmar in the Necromancer's Guild. They decided that they will dial up Moandor saying that they will meet him outside a Japanese restaurant.
So they called Moandor. Moandor responded, saying in a scary voice, "Hello", and Sandro responded with "Moandor, Whassuuuuppppp?!" Then Moandor responded with "Whasssuuupppp?", followed by Finneas and Nagash, who also joined in the Whassuuuppp shout. Then Sandro responded, "Moandor, we shall meet you in front of the Japanese restaurant in the city. And don't forget your tongue. Whasssssuuuuuuupppppp!"
Then everyone went "Whaassssuuuupppp" for a while until they got bored of it.
Soon Moandor met Sandro, Finneas and Nagash in front of the Japanese Restaurant. They whispered to each other and told them that they should hide their skeletal faces and don human masks in order to make sure that the waiters wouldn't recgonise who they were.
So they disguised themselves in human masks and went in. The waiter asked them what they wanted, and they said they wanted some sushi with wasabi. After that they laughed spookily under their masks.
A while later the waiter came back and said, "Here is your sushi, and the wasabi."
But at that second the waiter said, "Wasabi", Sandro took off his mask and said " Waaaasssssaaaaabbbbiiiiiiii". The other members removed their masks and gave the waiter spooky faces, also saying "Wassaaaabbbbbiiiii". The waiter was so scared and upset, he tried to call the management, but before he could,all of the chefs jumped out, carrying scary movie figurines, saying "Wasssaaabbiiiii" and Sandro and his gang loved it. They kept going wasssaabbiiiii until Sandro asked a crowd around him to move closer so that he could say something.
This is what Sandro said:
"Why does the necromancer cross the road?"
Everyone looked puzzled.
Then Sandro said, "To photograph someone's small c@¢k so that he could show it to the public about how small his c@¢k is!"
Then Sandro and his mates laughed their heads off and the crowd was forced to join in.
HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!
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No one knows my true nature here...
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Maniac
Disgraceful
Famous Hero
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posted June 07, 2002 06:36 PM |
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 08, 2002 03:14 AM |
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I'm glad it's not just me, LOL!!
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 16, 2002 05:51 AM |
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Mephala asks Jeddite, "If there are 5 sprites sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?"
Jeddite replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first shot."
Mephala replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."
Then Jeddite says, "I have a question for YOU. There are 3 women sitting on a bench having an ice cream, one is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream, which one is married? "
Mephala, blushing a great deal, replied, " Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
To which Jeddite replied, "The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on, but I like your thinking."
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Maniac
Disgraceful
Famous Hero
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posted June 16, 2002 10:54 AM |
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AAaaah yes...the classic
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malkia
Promising
Famous Hero
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posted June 16, 2002 01:08 PM |
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What is the shortest heroes joke!
it's.... "Heroes 4  "
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