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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: How I'm going to solve all the world's problems
Thread: How I'm going to solve all the world's problems This thread is 2 pages long: 1 2 · NEXT»
bort
bort


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
posted September 01, 2002 07:18 PM

How I'm going to solve all the world's problems

Problem #1 : Global Warming
Problem #2 : Overpopulation/Starvation/Disease/Poverty
Problem #3 : Excess Nuclear Weapons left over from cold war.

Solution :

1.  Take all of the former Soviet blocs nukes as well as the US nukes and China's and everybody elses nukes, place them in poor, highly populated areas, if there is a lot of squalor and filth in these places, even better.

2.  As each package of Nukes rotates closest to the sun (ie, high noon in, for instance, Calcutta) set them off simultaneously.

This should solve all of the above problems:
1.  The combined nuke blasts should push the Earth a little farther away from the sun, thereby cooling our planet down and refreezing the polar ice caps.

2.  The hungry, poor, diseased people are now dead.  What could be better?

3.  The nukes have exploded.  Problem solved.


Next week : I will attempt to solve the energy crisis by perfecting the famous "buttered toast strapped to a cat's back" generator.

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Athimus_Phaeni
Athimus_Phaeni


Famous Hero
Final Fantasy Fan
posted September 01, 2002 07:23 PM

Perfect Idea! The only problem is the radioactivity left in Earth and that we are out of orbit, but NO PROBLEM! We have all the Earth problems solved!
____________
But I won't be
Burned by the reflection
Of the fire in your eyes
As you're starying at the sun

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Lord_Woock
Lord_Woock


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
posted September 01, 2002 07:29 PM

we can always start more nu7kes on the other side of the planet a bit later! And about the radiation - just gather all the Rad Away (too bad only the people that played Fallout will understand) and use it on our planet!
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!

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2XtremeToTake
2XtremeToTake


Promising
Supreme Hero
posted September 01, 2002 08:02 PM

Sure, it will push us away from the sun. But remember, the combined force of all those nukes will be enough to blow a hole in the earth through the crust and probley right into the center, which will cause massive earthquakes,  tsunamis, and Volcano Eruptions to wipe out half of the earths population.

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hamsi128
hamsi128


Promising
Supreme Hero
tosser tavern owner
posted September 01, 2002 08:06 PM

to solve all worlds problems i have many ideas but somehow people will call me nihilist so i wont say them in public...

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MightyMage
MightyMage


Honorable
Legendary Hero
of INSANITY and DELICIOUSNESS
posted September 01, 2002 08:08 PM

Well that would solve the overpopulation problem wouldn't it?

Ah hell with our problems.  Let's go take somone else's planet and start over.  When were done ruining that one we'll just move on.  Our whole soler system's gonna go up in smoke eventually anyway.
____________
Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage.  For he is all I could ever
want to be!
- OhforfSake

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privatehudson
privatehudson


Responsible
Legendary Hero
The Ultimate Badass
posted September 02, 2002 12:47 AM

The simplest way to solve most of the world's problems is to create a virus that wipes out all of mankind. End of problems really
____________
We're on an express elevator to Hell, goin' down!

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Athimus_Phaeni
Athimus_Phaeni


Famous Hero
Final Fantasy Fan
posted September 02, 2002 12:58 AM

I am not sure, because the men have changed the world so much that I think the Nature wont recover only by itself.
____________
But I won't be
Burned by the reflection
Of the fire in your eyes
As you're starying at the sun

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privatehudson
privatehudson


Responsible
Legendary Hero
The Ultimate Badass
posted September 02, 2002 01:08 AM

well I don't know I only know that whilst humans are on the planet it will always be the case that greed wand paranioa wins out over preservation and conservation, so recovery for the planet may not enter the Human Race's head until it is far too late.

(Oh and I am NOT a member of Greenpeace before anyone asks)
____________
We're on an express elevator to Hell, goin' down!

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Shadow_Elf
Shadow_Elf


Wandering Thief
posted September 02, 2002 01:16 AM

what they should do is use all those abandon apartments/fireplaces/dwellings and make them into home less people/animal mass dwellings
____________
Dont mess with the best cuz u aint got no contest.
Forget the rulz they were made to be broken

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dArGOn
dArGOn


Famous Hero
posted September 02, 2002 08:55 AM

That one gave me a chuckle Bort

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privatehudson
privatehudson


Responsible
Legendary Hero
The Ultimate Badass
posted September 02, 2002 10:17 AM

Methinks Bort has far tooooooooo much time on his hands
____________
We're on an express elevator to Hell, goin' down!

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Sir_Stiven
Sir_Stiven


Honorable
Legendary Hero
banned
posted September 02, 2002 08:03 PM

ROFL

nice to see your posts again bort

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bort
bort


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
posted July 28, 2003 04:57 PM

Alright, who's the wiseguy who slipped this thread into official White House policy?
____________
Drive by posting.

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RedSoxFan3
RedSoxFan3


Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
posted April 03, 2007 04:04 AM

bump
____________
Go Red Sox!

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TitaniumAlloy
TitaniumAlloy


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Professional
posted April 03, 2007 07:12 AM

I could solve all the worlds problems





If I cared
____________
John says to live above hell.

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RedSoxFan3
RedSoxFan3


Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
posted April 03, 2007 07:22 AM
Edited by RedSoxFan3 at 07:22, 03 Apr 2007.

Quote:
I could solve all the worlds problems





If I cared


I remember back when you actually used to be a positive member. Seems like all you ever do is make the same sarcastic remarks about every post.

The shtick gets old.
____________
Go Red Sox!

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kookastar
kookastar


Honorable
Legendary Hero
posted April 03, 2007 11:53 AM
Edited by kookastar at 11:55, 03 Apr 2007.

I'm gonna solve the world's problems with:

a smile, a rubber band, and a frizbee

oh those other things...
____________
uhuh

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Guitarguy
Guitarguy


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Rockoon.
posted April 03, 2007 12:17 PM

Quote:
Solution :

Blimpy.

Quote:
Problem solved.

Exactly.

-Guitarguy
____________

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frostwolf
frostwolf


Famous Hero
livin' in a bottle of vodka
posted April 04, 2007 10:39 PM

No why would you want to solve all of earth's problems when it's so funny to watch how we slowly set our own a**es on fire and no nothing ewxept talk about it.  
____________
What can you expect from a world where everybody lives because they're too afraid to commit suicide?


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