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| Thread: TheRealDeal's Nightschool for Women - Cause they need it! |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 · NEXT» |
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 12, 2004 05:33 PM |
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TheRealDeal's Nightschool for Women - Cause they need it!
Women! We love em, but there is just so much hassle. Here is some courses you can send your woman to if needed:
1. Silence: The Final Frontier! Where no woman has gone before.
2. The unnoticed part of a bank: INSERTING money.
3. Parties: How to survive without new clothes.
4. Protect your dude: Chores can wait til AFTER the game.
5. Bathroom Rule 1: Men also need room.
6. Bathroom Rule 2: His Shaver, is HIS!
7. Communication 1: Tears are the last resort, not the first.
8. Communication 2: Think before you speak.
9. Communication 3: How to get what you want, WITHOUT begging.
10. Driving Safe: This is a Skill you CAN achieve!
11. Telephones: How to hang up!
12. Introduction to Parking.
13. Parking for Smart Women: How to parrallelpark.
14. Cooking 1: Get bacon, eggs and butter back into the kitchen.
15. Cooking 2: Tofu isn't food.
16. Cooking 3: You go on a diet, NOT him!
17. Compliments: How to take them nicely.
18. PMS: Your problem, not his.
19. Dancing: Why men just doesn't want to.
20. Classic Clothes: Using clothes more than once.
21. Dust: A thing only women notice.
22. Integration of Laundry: How to wash it all together.
23. Oil and Gas: The Car needs BOTH!
24. Remote Controls: Only for Men!
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Heres a little Quest for all you Guys out there. Vote for the Woman on HC that needs it the most, and that one woman will get all the courses for FREE!*
*Only becomes free if she does some free comercials for the project - Copyright 2004/2005.
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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RedSoxFan3
Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
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posted December 12, 2004 06:14 PM |
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Boo this has been done before.  jk
Good stuff RealDeal I bet a good half of it is TheRealDeal too.
We should like call you HalfOfTheRealDeal.
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Go Red Sox!
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 12, 2004 06:20 PM |
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I am the Human Incarnation of Funny
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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Daddy
Responsible
Supreme Hero
and why not.
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posted December 12, 2004 06:50 PM |
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Indeed, I laughed some good time here! 
Well done^^
reg
Daddy
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 12, 2004 07:27 PM |
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Heres a little Quest for all you Guys out there. Vote for the Woman on HC that needs it the most, and that one woman will get all the courses for FREE!*
*Only becomes free if she does some free comercials for the project - Copyright 2004/2005.
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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Asmodean
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Heroine at the weekend.
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posted December 13, 2004 08:20 AM |
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Quote:
Vote for the Woman on HC that needs it the most
I vote for Gorman
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To err is human, to arr is pirate.
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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted December 13, 2004 10:22 AM |
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LOL Pandora take note.
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 13, 2004 10:44 PM |
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You have to explain WHY you want it for the person =)(I understand why you'd ask for Gorman though)
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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TitaniumAlloy
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Professional
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posted December 14, 2004 11:23 AM |
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Sexism run rampant.
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John says to live above hell.
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Dragon_Slayer
Honorable
Supreme Hero
toss toss toss
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posted December 14, 2004 12:12 PM |
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lol
just lol!
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 15, 2004 07:05 AM |
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Sorry... but..
Some guys need help with a few things aswell.
Heres the list:
1: Communication I: How to ignore womens babbling.
2: Communication II: How to make women stop babling.
3: Communication III: How to avoid her those days of the month.
4: Cooking I: How to avoid Tofu.
5: Cooking II: How to avoid cleaning the dishes.
6: Sex I: How to get it without getting her jewlery.
7: Sex II: How to avoid it only becomming a weekly basis.
8: Sex III: How to play "Multiplayer"
9: Sex IV: Buy her the book called "Kama Sutra"
10: PMS I: What weapons to use.
11: PMS II: Where to Hide.
12: PMS III: How to avoid her mother in this time.
13 PMS IV: Possible Exits.
This was just a little help to all you men out there
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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darksparkle
Hired Hero
Quote the raven,
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posted December 15, 2004 07:23 AM |
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that was so funny i forgot to laugh
Quote:
1. Silence: The Final Frontier! Where no woman has gone before.
2. The unnoticed part of a bank: INSERTING money.
3. Parties: How to survive without new clothes.
6. Bathroom Rule 2: His Shaver, is HIS!
8. Communication 2: Think before you speak.
9. Communication 3: How to get what you want, WITHOUT begging.
10. Driving Safe: This is a Skill you CAN achieve!
11. Telephones: How to hang up!
12. Introduction to Parking.
13. Parking for Smart Women: How to parrallelpark.
22. Integration of Laundry: How to wash it all together.
23. Oil and Gas: The Car needs BOTH!
24. Remote Controls: Only for Men!
very funny.
i can keep my mouth shut when i need to ty very much
i know when i need to invest
i can go through a party with ONE set of clothers
no duh, why would i use a guys razor?? im not shaving
my face
i dont usually blurt things
u know what, if i want something and it isnt given to me
of course im gonna whine! its me!!
ha, ha, ha. there are also equally bad men drivers.
we hang up when we're done talking, even if thats a long
time. what if were talking to u guys?
i would say something rude, but im holding my tongue
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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted December 16, 2004 10:16 AM |
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Quote:
Some guys need help with a few things aswell.
Heres the list:
1: Communication I: How to ignore womens babbling.
2: Communication II: How to make women stop babling.
3: Communication III: How to avoid her those days of the month.
4: Cooking I: How to avoid Tofu.
5: Cooking II: How to avoid cleaning the dishes.
6: Sex I: How to get it without getting her jewlery.
7: Sex II: How to avoid it only becomming a weekly basis.
8: Sex III: How to play "Multiplayer"
9: Sex IV: Buy her the book called "Kama Sutra"
10: PMS I: What weapons to use.
11: PMS II: Where to Hide.
12: PMS III: How to avoid her mother in this time.
13 PMS IV: Possible Exits.
This was just a little help to all you men out there
LOL
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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TitaniumAlloy
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Professional
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posted December 16, 2004 01:34 PM |
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Quote:
that was so funny i forgot to laugh
very funny.
i can keep my mouth shut when i need to ty very much
i know when i need to invest
i can go through a party with ONE set of clothers
no duh, why would i use a guys razor?? im not shaving
my face
i dont usually blurt things
u know what, if i want something and it isnt given to me
of course im gonna whine! its me!!
ha, ha, ha. there are also equally bad men drivers.
we hang up when we're done talking, even if thats a long
time. what if were talking to u guys?
i would say something rude, but im holding my tongue
It's a sexist thread, on a very thin foundation of prejudice. We all know about what you just said, TRD is just trying to get his jollies. Don't get offended.
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John says to live above hell.
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 16, 2004 05:12 PM |
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At the least several people find it funny
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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Rhyanna
Adventuring Hero
Queen of the Harpies!
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posted December 17, 2004 12:12 AM |
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Quote:
At the least several people find it funny
it is funny
and its sexist as hell, but heck... the funniest things aren't appropriate.
thats partially why they're so funny.
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I can resist anything but temptation
- Oscar Wilde
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AzureMajesty
Promising
Adventuring Hero
Gaea Mother Earth
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posted December 17, 2004 05:04 AM |
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Following the popular Women's Training Course is the EVER more popular Becoming a Real Man
A two-year degree is being offered at Life University that many of you should be interested in.
That's right, in just six tri-mesters, you, too, can be a Real Man.
Please take a moment to look over the program outline.
FIRST YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101 Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103 PMS - Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104 We Do Not Want Sleazy Underthings for Christmas
Winter Schedule:
MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to getting in at 4am
MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A What's Hers is Hers
Spring Schedule:
MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like an Jerk When You're Wrong
MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 YOU, The Weaker Sex
MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers
SECOND YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep Without It
SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It's awake, Take a Shower
MEN 201 How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 202 How to Put the Toilet Seat Down - Elective (See Electives Below)
Winter Schedule:
MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213 Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise, Especially When Naked
MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important
Spring Schedule:
MEN 220 Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is NOT Necessary
MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important II
Course Electives:
EAT 101 Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102 Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103 Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231 Mothers-in-law
MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233 Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001B Cheaper to Keep Her (Must Pass ECON 001A)
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IYY
Responsible
Supreme Hero
REDACTED
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posted December 17, 2004 05:15 AM |
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Note that most of the courses in this program are also, if not more, suitable for women.
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Korejora
Promising
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posted December 17, 2004 06:26 AM |
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I went to a wonderful prepostsecondary school prior to becoming a woman (because I am in fact not yet a woman). The courses I passed were as follows:
Clothes 10H: Not buying new clothes month.
Clothes 20-AP: Not buying clothes every year.
Clothes 30-AP: Never buying new clothes. Final mark: 88%
Note: Students who pass CTH330A (Clothes 30-AP) are entitled to yearly gifts of clothing, such as for birthdays or Christmas celebrations if applicable.
Shopping 10H: Avoiding Impulse Buys
Shopping 20-AP: Not getting things just because they're on sale.
Shopping 30-AP: Getting Only What You Came For - Final mark: 92% (I would have had a straight 100, but my mark went down when I let my friend drag me around the mall one day...)
Television 10H: Not needing the remote control
Television 20(R): Not needing a certain channel
Television 30-AP: Knowing where the remote is, even if you never use it - Final mark: 98%
Talking 10: Short Phone Conversations
Talking 20: Alternatives to Ranting
Talking 30: Not Talking During the Movie - Final mark: 87%
PF Self-defense 10: Safe Fighting
Note: Self-defense 10 has a great summer course for males, PF Self-defense 10-M: Catfights Are Not Amusing!
PF Self-defense 20: Avoiding the Open-Hand Strike
PF Self-defense 30: Not Between the Legs - Final Mark: 67% (I had non-slapping down, but I had trouble in this more advanced course...)
Unfortunately, I couldn't quite get a Female Diploma because I failed to complete a Cooking course.... that and the teacher said I missed some key concepts in Proper Female Self-defense: Not Between the Legs. At least I think that's what he said. He was rolling on the floor in agony; it was hard to tell.
Boy, I think I failed my humour course, too... 
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That's the best part. 
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Asmodean
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Heroine at the weekend.
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posted December 17, 2004 06:32 AM |
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I think catfights are amusing, nothing is funnnier than two girls pulling eachothers hair and clawing while screeching at the top of their lungs.
But that's just me......
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To err is human, to arr is pirate.
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