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Heroes Community > Bards Glade Pyre (RPG) > Thread: Woocks Spam Angels
Thread: Woocks Spam Angels This thread is 3 pages long: 1 2 3 · «PREV

Famous Hero
posted February 01, 2007 07:16 PM

Klaus get to the Strip Bar (huh? Strip?)

He go in. He do what a man can do at Strip Bar. Then he go out from there. He go to a Misteryus Place. Looks he want to meet John Mighty.

Guard: Who are you?
Vodka: I'm Klaus.
Guard: Why you here?
Vodka: I want to meet John Mighty.
Guard: John Mighty? The Keeper? Intersting. Go ahead.

Gone ahead. Waiting, waiting, waiting...

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Supreme Hero
of Typos
posted February 06, 2007 08:50 AM
Edited by Iris at 09:17, 06 Feb 2007.


Iris woke slowly and opened her eyes.  Dark blotches obscured her vision as her eyes worked to adjust to the bright lights.  She stayed still at first, trying to recall what had happened and where she was.  A few grimaces appeared on her face as she tried to push herself up to a sitting position, but a piercing headache suddenly made her fall back onto the bed again.

Where...  Where am I?  Ugh, my head...

She stayed still at first, hands around her temples, trying to ease the headache.  A few moments passed, and random images began to flash in her mind.  There was a man, a man with a bag of... the most random objects—a whisk, a frying pan, an extra pair of pants, a baseball bat, soap, piggy bank, and...  “Tranquilizer gun,” she said to herself as her memories rushed back to her.

The man, she remembered, called himself, “John Mighty.”

What a pompous name.

She was at the store, looking for her game, when she saw the giant creature with a fishhead.  She had said something to it, but before she could get a reply, that large man in a suit with sunglasses, that John Mighty, had approached her.  He grabbed her arm and said something about Angels, some sort of rotting flesh, and W00t.  Or was it Whoop?  Or...

She shook her head.

Regardless, he muttered a bunch of nonsense to her.  When she responded by breaking free and kicking him in the face, he took out a taser gun and tried to zap her with it.  The fight that followed was one of the strangest she had ever encountered.  At one point, he even tried to knock her out with a broken toilet seat cover.  After dodging a series of random objects being thrown her way, she managed to grab his taser, which she used against him quite a few times.  The last thing she remembered was a plate of delicious looking turtle cheesecake that he pulled out of the bag, which worked just like a hypnosis charm, and before she could snap out of the trance, he managed to hit her with a small amount of tranquilizing liquid.

What happened between then and now was a mystery to her.

Iris sat up again and rubbed at the sore spot on her side where she was hit with the sedative.

That bastard.  When I get out of here, I’m going to kil—

A soft groan startled her and she quickly looked to the bed next to her.  Another woman was lying there.  A woman with green hair.  And a dog.  In a pink sweater.

“Um...” Iris said softly and unsurely.  “Hello?  Are you awake?”

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Legendary Hero
posted February 06, 2007 12:06 PM
Edited by kookastar at 12:16, 06 Feb 2007.

Hushed feminine words niggled through the haze, “Hello?  Are you awake?”
I was.  The room within my eyelids was still spinning though, so I let the words hang there as I searched my neurons for a memory of what happened before the darkness.  Somewhere after a fantasy with a six-pack and bubbles of another kind I found it and pressed play…

ABBA was playing, my rubber ducky was a dancing queen performing for a superman {the cute new one} shaped bubblebath bottle.  Sheila was howling with her feet propped up on the side of the tub and…


A shadow momentarily filled my window before disappearing with a sound that reminded me of the first time I tried to play an Atari with a broken thumb.  sigh  Whoever this was they weren’t being too subtle.  And they had made a random noise during the chorus – I was not impressed.

Rising from the tub, I grabbed my fluffy pink sweater and slid into it – the bubbles squishing beneath it against my flesh.  I wasn’t sure what compelled me to put on this sweater, but thought there must have been some prophetic force at play...  There were some low-cut, non g-string panties there too, so after slipping into them I peered out the window to identify the culprit.

Either I had spent too long admiring my butt in the steamy mirror, or this guy was more adept at surviving a great fall and then scaling a fifteen-story building than I first thought.  I didn’t have time to think about it before…

A brown man with a brown t-shirt in a brown suit landed in my bath.  His eyes looked… shiny.  

*Some cliché action music began to play*

“Kooka; John Mighty.”  did he need to use the loo?  For a number two? The man was rising from the tub and reaching for a taser in his pack.  
“You need to come with me.”
need huh?
I opened the draw of the vanity and began flinging tiny bars of hotel soap at him, squeezing the ends of the packages and shooting the cakes of raw chemical at unnatural speeds.  He was deflecting them as though they were regular household items…  what was happening… did this guy have some kind of secret power over random object-weapons…

Shiela was barking and…

This memory sequence had gone on for long enough…

I opened my eyes, felt Shiela’s nose against my cheek, and sat up to meet the eyes of the most beautiful woman I had ever met.

“Where are we?”


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Legendary Hero
posted February 07, 2007 06:28 AM
Edited by MightyMage at 06:06, 08 Feb 2007.

"...And this will be billed to Mr. Woock?  The Mr. Woock?"

"That's right.  All my information should be on file."

"Right, John Mighty.  Well Thank you for choosing St. Mary General.  Hope you feel well.  Oh, Mr. Mighty, Sir, should we leave your room open?"

Hmmmm, just one more to go.  The green one was easier then he thought.  If things continued in this direction then this so called "DC" should be a cinch.

"No, I don't think that will be necessary.  Thank you."

He walked out of the hospital and headed for his company vehicle.  Sliding into the pleather seats, he activated the GPS system and found the location of his third and final target.  DC.

"A Marina huh.  This should be fun."

John drove off toward the local Marina to confront DC...ok capture DC and lure her into working as an undercover agent.
After a short drive he arrived at his destination and began his hunt.  After a quick search of the pool and the surrounding areas he found no sign of her.

"Damn, she must be inside.  I have to avoid causing a scene this time."

He quickly sorted through his bag and found what he was looking for.

"Ahhhhh, here it is.  A piece of the Dread Pirate's Hidden Treasure.  This is sure to lure her outside.  After that, WHACK!"

Sure enough the glint of the sun carried the shimmer of the mystical jewel in through the window.  As expected, DC came out to investigate.  Once her head was through the door, John threw a large cloth bag over it.  A few quick knots with the rope and DC was as good as captured.  He tossed her in the back of his vehicle and quickly sped away...unfortunately he forgot to close the trunk.

"OH S#!%"

John swerved out of traffic and quickly jumped out to retrieve his package.  The scene he was hoping to avoid occurred in the middle of a busy intersection.  "I can't get back to HQ quick enough" he thought to himself.
Once there he went up to the 19th floor and found the room he was looking for.  Surprisingly enough, DC barely fought.  A few kicks and wiggles and she settled down.
There it was, room 23.  This would take quick reflexes to avoid an ambush by the other girls.


"Uh...Hey, What's that?"

Having deterred the girls' attention, John threw DC into the room to jojn the others.  Now to report back to Woock...
Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage.  For he is all I could ever
want to be!
- OhforfSake

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Legendary Hero
posted March 31, 2007 10:45 AM

"Where are we?" I asked.
"In a room," the girl answered.
"Oh... a room!"

The door opened it was HIM, we stepped foward to meet our captor.


Another girl was thrust towards us.  She was sexy too... very red...

The impact threw us all to the floor, the door slammed shut and we faced each other.  

"WTF is going on!"
This girl's got some spunk.
"We're in a room."
"A room, with a hot tub."
We turned to see follow her gaze, there it was, full of bubbles, and there was champagne on the table beside it.

Only 3 glasses...

"What are you waiting for?" the newcomer stripped off and hopped into the tub.  Laughing, we joined her, searching the walls for cameras.


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Known Hero
posted March 31, 2007 04:10 PM

Close to that room, next to that room, there's an other room. Klaus dwelled there. He practices charming womans. After he did it, someone neters his room.

"Freeze!" said a policeman.

"No!" said Klaus, and he equps his Lightsaber (somewhat like the Star Wars lightsaber) and cut down that policeman's head.

"Hey! He's not a policeman! He's a gangsta!" Klaus says when he revalls that "policeman" don't have a badge.

Klaus goes out from the room.

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