|
| Thread: The Inn Uendo... |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 · «PREV / NEXT» |
|
Lord_Woock
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
|
posted November 18, 2002 07:59 PM |
|
|
So anyway, there was this joke.
A sandwich comes into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender points to a sign with the following text: "We don't serve food".
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
|
|
Slava14
Promising
Famous Hero
I am 16 now....
|
|
posted November 18, 2002 08:49 PM |
|
|
I've got a better one...
A man walks into a bar ans says "Ouch!!"..
____________
I'm always happy to help.. unless I'm helping myself.
|
|
Lord_Woock
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
|
|
posted November 18, 2002 08:57 PM |
|
|
Err... Come again?
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
|
|
bort
Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
|
|
posted November 18, 2002 09:00 PM |
|
|
Bar = place can buy drinks
Bar = for instance, a metal rod
There are other versions, for instance "Baby seal walks into a club."
Another bad bar joke:
Man walks into a bar says "Give me an alligator sandwich and make it snappy."
|
|
pandora
Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
|
|
posted November 18, 2002 09:24 PM |
|
|
A priest , a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar..
Bartender looks at them and says. "what is this? some kind of joke?"
____________
"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
|
|
HeyYou
Known Hero
and beloved food provider.
|
posted November 18, 2002 11:51 PM |
|
|
Finishes his coke, asks for a refill
* Talking to anyone within earshot *
So a duck waddles into a bar. He hops up on the bar and says,
"Hey, bartender, got any duck food?"
"No, now get out of my bar!"
So the duck leaves.
Next day, the duck waddles back into the bar.
"Hey, bartender, got any duck food?"
"I told you yesterday, I don't have duck food! Now get out!"
So the duck leaves.
Next day, the duck once again waddles into the bar.
"Hey, bartender, got any duck food?"
"Look, I'm sick and tired of you coming in here every day and asking for duck food. If you do it again, I'm gonna nail your little webbed feet to the bar, got it?!? Now get out, and don't come back!"
So the duck leaves.
Next day, the duck waddles back into the bar. The bartender turns around, sees him, and is about to start yelling at him, when the duck says,
"Wait, wait, don't yell at me, I have a different question today. Really."
"Fine, but make it quick. I'm busy right now."
"Do you have a hammer?"
"What does this look like, a hardware store? No, I don't have a hammer."
"Got any duck food then?"
____________
"Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity."
~ Hanlon's Razor
|
|
Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
|
|
posted November 19, 2002 03:31 AM |
|
|
Walks in hearing joke's, order's an ale..
"Hey nice place you got OT, I have a joke too  "
"-----
So this new guy in the bars having a few one night, and some regulars tell him about a bet.
"We got this here bet goin' on, ya' see that there pickle jar fulla money?"
*See's a huge jar full of change, 1's, 5's, and even a few ten's"
"Well I be, that theres a lotta money"
"Yup, sure is. If you can do three thing's the whole thang'll be yours.. Whatta you say, wanna try?"
"Hm, depend's what are the three thing's?"
"Alright listen up, ya' see that there big guy, well his name's john, in construction he is.. First thing you gotta do is knock him out in one punch
Then there's this here dog down stair's.. A pit bull, fierce ol' dog named bob. Ya' gotta pull out one of his teeth."
"Hmm, I'm not sure, go on what else?"
"The ol' hag Nerma's about the nastiest woman around this town.. She's right over there and ya' gotta **** her"
*The nearby drunk's start chuckling*
"Duh huhuh.. Ya' you gotta **** 'er"
The new guy shrugs it off. "I dont think so ya'll"
"Well suit yerself, there's gotta be over 500 big ones in that there jar. Just let us know if you change yer mind."
~*2 hour's and 8 drink's later*~
The new guy jumps up runnin' twoards John.
*BLIP* Knocks him on his ***
He runs down stair's and everyone in the bar is silent.
All they hear is the dog barkin', growlin, wall's getting bumped into, and things breaking..
He come's back up stair's, his shirt's all torn to shred's, got blood all over him and he say's
"Aright, where's Nerma and one of them pairs plyer's or somethin'"
|
|
kittenangel
Supreme Hero
Lee's wifey
|
|
posted November 19, 2002 06:28 PM |
|
|
*buys the crowd a round at the bar*
DRINKS ARE ON ME!!! *yells*
____________
Never wear anything that panics
the cat.
|
|
Lord_Woock
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
|
|
posted November 19, 2002 07:12 PM |
|
|
Why, thank you!
*hands KittenAngel a bag of infernal mice*
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
|
|
HeyYou
Known Hero
and beloved food provider.
|
posted November 19, 2002 08:49 PM |
|
|
|
kittenangel
Supreme Hero
Lee's wifey
|
|
posted November 19, 2002 09:03 PM |
|
|
sorry I am a veggietarian  i dun eat meat
____________
Never wear anything that panics
the cat.
|
|
HeyYou
Known Hero
and beloved food provider.
|
|
posted November 19, 2002 11:51 PM |
|
|
More for me
* gets up, goes to restroom to wash chesseburger grease off of hands, returns to bar *
|
|
Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
|
|
posted November 20, 2002 02:36 AM |
|
|
"The country I'm from, we eat cat's"
|
|
Lord_Woock
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
|
|
posted November 20, 2002 07:12 PM |
|
|
Quote:
sorry I am a veggietarian i dun eat meat
You can always give them to a friend.
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
|
|
tuapui
Famous Hero
Poetic Psycho Baby BlackDragon
|
|
posted November 20, 2002 08:23 PM |
|
|
mice for me?
thanks
____________
 <<<Hy
peractive Do not touch.
Highly Psychotically Poetic.
|
|
Lith-Maethor
Honorable
Legendary Hero
paid in Coin and Cleavage
|
|
posted November 25, 2002 11:24 AM |
|
|
"takes a sip and leans back"
...not much action here ...yet... I wonder what the old man had in mind when he bought th,is place... stand-up comedians in the inn's bar ain't his style that's for sure...
...that very moment, a dark haired Elf walks in the Inn Uendo... she looks around and when she sees Lith, she grabs two bottles of wine and pours one of them on Kitten ...
- you did say the drinks are on you, right?
...Morwen smiles and walks towards Lith as the Old Man appears at the door...
____________
You are suffering from delusions of adequacy.
|
|
Lord_Woock
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
|
|
posted May 26, 2003 10:29 PM |
|
|
*A huge undead dwarf enters, but doesn't see anyone inside*
Uh, anybody here?
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
|
|
Marelt_Ekiran
Promising
Famous Hero
Watcher of All
|
|
posted May 27, 2003 02:26 AM |
|
|
Everyone has been avoiding this place ever since the name "Morwen" was so horribly disgraced here. Have respect for one of Tolkien's most tragic characters.
P.S. She wasn't an elf. She was human.
____________
Perception is everything.
|
|
Lith-Maethor
Honorable
Legendary Hero
paid in Coin and Cleavage
|
posted May 27, 2003 09:27 AM |
|
|
re: Morwen
Morwen, mother of Turin Turambar (and Niniel) or Tuor (can't remember now) was indeed a human and a tragic figure in Middle earth...
Morwen however as a word is elven (Sindarin to be exact) and means "dark beauty" ...she was given that name cause of her black hair and somewhat grim appearance...
the Morwen I'm talkign about is pretty much Elven however, and luckily for me the alter ego of my GF...
just for the record, this place was avoided because at the time, things were not as good for taverns like this...
now sit back and have a drink...
____________
You are suffering from delusions of adequacy.
|
|
Lord_Woock
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
|
|
posted May 27, 2003 09:42 AM |
|
|
So anyway, there was this joke:
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
|
|
|
|
