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| Thread: Blond jokes. |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 · «PREV |
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malkia
Promising
Famous Hero
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posted May 23, 2004 03:32 AM |
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So a blonde goes to a doctor, complaing of a headache. The doctor checks her for hours, cannot find anything wrong. The blond wants to get fixed asap, so an operation follows. Head's now opened, but nothing really there... except a buzzing wire attached across. Voila! Problem found! So the doctor pulls the wire and the blond's ear fell off. And no more headaches.
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balcough_dra...
Supreme Hero
unlucky? i want to pump you up
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posted May 23, 2004 04:39 AM |
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whats a blonde with pig tails?
a blow job with handle bars
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2XtremeToTake
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted May 23, 2004 04:44 AM |
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One day a blonde goes down to lousiana. She goes into a store and asks the store manager if he sells alligator shoes. The store manager says "why yes. Only for $200"
The Blonde says "$200, yea right! ill just catch my own alligator"
Scoffing, the Store manager says "Yea, right, good luck."
The blonde storms out. On the store manager's way home, he sees the same blonde in the swamps. He stops and watches. To his suprise, a 6 foot alligator swims towards her furiously. She grabs it and holds its mouth open, then stabs it. She drags it to the shore. Astonished, the manager sees that there are about 6 other alligators on the shore as well. The blonde flips the alligator onto its back, and says
"damnit! This ones not wearing any shoes either!"
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I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
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Svarog
Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
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posted May 23, 2004 08:17 PM |
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An atom travels inside a blonde's head. Suddenly it bumps into her brain and says: "OH, I'm sorry. Didn't see you there."
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The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.
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darksparkle
Hired Hero
Quote the raven,
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posted December 15, 2004 07:13 AM |
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a blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all fugitives. they are running and the cops are chasing after them. they go into a barn and find some empty potato sacks. each picks a sack and climbs in. an officer goes in and kicks the sack with the brunette in it. she says, "meow" he says, "oh, its just a cat." so he goes to the next one. he kicks it. the redhead barks. he says "oh, its just a dog," and moves on to the next one. this had the blonde in it. he kicks the sack and she says, "potato, potato."
two blonde guys are walking down the border of a construction site. one digs a hole and the other fills it in. they did this for some time until, finally, a girl stops and asks them, "what are you doing?" the both reply, "we're planting trees, but the guy whos supposed to put the tree in is out sick."
i rest my case.
-Raivyn-
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Asmodean
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Heroine at the weekend.
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posted December 15, 2004 09:03 AM |
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Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
A: "Oh look! Donut seeds!"
Q: What did the blonde name her pet zebra?
A: Spot.
Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
A: Because she got an F in sex.
Q: A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
A: "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Q: What do you call a zit on a blonde's ass?
A: A brain tumor.
Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
A: So she wouldn't get Hearing Aids.
Q: Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?
A: Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.
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To err is human, to arr is pirate.
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TitaniumAlloy
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Professional
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posted December 15, 2004 10:22 AM |
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Some funny stuff in here!
Quote:
There were three women who were at the gynecologist having pre-natal checkups. The doctor asked the red head"In what position was the baby conceived ?"
"He was on top ", she replied.
"You will have a boy !" the doctor exclaimed.
The brunette was asked the same question.
"I was on top ", was the reply.
"you will have a baby girl." said the doctor.
With this, the blond, burst into tears.
"Whats the matter ?" asked the doc.
"Am I going to have puppies ?".....
More tomorrow 
However I don't get this one.  I'm not blonde though.
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John says to live above hell.
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Shenjairo
Known Hero
Simsalabim
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posted December 15, 2004 02:59 PM |
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TheRealDeal
Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
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posted December 15, 2004 05:17 PM |
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You put it so poeticly my friend
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*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.
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ratmonky
Famous Hero
Abu Hur Ibn Rashka
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posted December 15, 2004 05:17 PM |
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you are too young to get 
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Dies illa, dies irae,
Calamitatis et miseriae.
Requiem aeternum
Dona eis, dona eis Domine.
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EvilLoynis
Famous Hero
The Dark Shadow
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posted December 16, 2004 05:24 AM |
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Question: What do you call a smart Blonde?
Answer: A Golden Retriever.
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"I am both selfish and instictive. I value nature and the world around me as means to an end as well as an end in itself; at best I ... too long to display...
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adnama
Adventuring Hero
the one & only mad sorcerers
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posted June 17, 2005 03:51 PM |
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Sorry.................very sorry indead
sorry but this one might lower the tone!
whot do you get if you stand a blond on her head?
...................................................................................... a brounet with bad breath ! sorry i hang out with the derty minded guys. but i wouldent have it any other way, it tuck me a long time to get them in to that mind set!
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(cart spell DYSLEXIC)A Smille wont kill u. But I might Go ahead smille!
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Orion
Known Hero
Dark God of Ordered Chaos
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posted June 20, 2005 05:55 AM |
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what do you call a blonde who dies her hair brown
A.I. (artificial intelligence)
3 blondes are walking through the woods when they come
across some tracks
the first blond says they are dingo tracks
the second blonde says they are fox tracks
the third blonde got hit by a train
a blonde is driving down the highway when she see a
brunette doing jumping jacks on the road saying 21 21 21
the blonde pulls over gets out and decides to join in.
After a few minutes the brunette goes and sits down off
the road, the blonde who having alot of fun stays
after another couple of minutes a truck runs the blonde down.
the brunette gets up and starts over again saying 22 22 22
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Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for it bends to my will
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DoddTheSlayer
Promising
Famous Hero
Banned from opening threads
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posted June 20, 2005 12:58 PM |
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Q. What is the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley.
A. A shopping trolley has a mind of its own.
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Retaliation is for the foolish. Silence is wisdom
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2XtremeToTake
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted June 20, 2005 01:38 PM |
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How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Put her in a circular room and tell her theres a dollar in the corner.
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tigris
Supreme Hero
Supreme Noobolator
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posted June 20, 2005 06:28 PM |
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Q:how does a blonde calls a piece of paper cut in half?
A:a puzzle
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adnama
Adventuring Hero
the one & only mad sorcerers
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posted June 27, 2005 04:06 PM |
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how many blonds dose it take to change a light-bulb?
......... go on gess........................fine i will tell you........ the ancer is none that just walk around in the dark and wounder what happend to the light!
And hear is another one for you but it is not a joke but it is funny! it is a real story!
this litte blond 6 year old gril was geting very anoyed withe the boys in her class geting the grils to do hand stands so tht that they could see thire nikers.so when one day she had had-anoth with it so she desided to do sumething about it. that night she prouldy anoused that the boys did not see her nikers today. her mum asked if she had not played with the other grils at play time, and the litte gril proclaimed oh no mummy i toke my nikers off before i did hand stands so they dident see my nikers!
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(cart spell DYSLEXIC)A Smille wont kill u. But I mightGo ahead smille!
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isabelyes
Fierce Battlegriffin
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posted November 06, 2007 08:30 PM |
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plz post more theyre funny!!!
really!
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