|
| Thread: Our lives are the stage | |
|
DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
|
posted January 29, 2010 12:51 AM |
|
|
Our lives are the stage
"What if the purpose of our lives were just to feature in this story?" Bob said. The man he was speaking to started laughing. "No, I'm serious, here, for a moment! I mean, I'd never be the main character, now would I?" he said. His conversational partner still snickered a bit. "Well, why's that?" he finally responded.
"Well, think about it! Have you ever seen a movie or read a book where the bartender was the main character? I think not. And even if you did, the actual bartending wouldn't be really important! Ergo, you and I are just background characters in someone else's story! We probably don't even have names."
"That's true, unless we loudly mention them. We'd probably make ourselves more important for the plot in the meantime as well. I mean, those characters have names, right? Those are Bob and Bert! Completely diminutive first names, BUT we'd at least have names."
"You're the lucky one, then. I mean, Bert is at least a bit of an oddbal name." Bob said, with a half-smile on his face. He turned to the bar. "Now, is there something I can offer you? I'm bored and bartenders don't have to pay squat!" he loudly commented.
"To be honest, no..." Bert replied. Silence followed...
Bob then broke the silence again. "Now, who would be the main character?" he said.
"You're seriously still going on about this?"
"Obviously, I mean I'm pretty sure we're not in an action movie. look at us! half the people in this room don't even drink! Naah, it would probably pay off to know the main character."
Bert squinted and looked at the crowd. "I think it's pretty safe to say we can discount everyone we don't know. The bartenders with names would know and speak to the main characters right?"
"Exactly, my friend!" Bob said.
"What are you guys talking about?" a blonde girl with brown eyes asked.
Bert turned away, a bit ashamed. Bob smiled, unembarassed, "We're discussing who'd be the main character in this room." he said. The girl raised her eye brow. "Excuse me?" she asked incredulously.
"We're discussing that, if this were a story, say a novel or a movie, who would be the main character in this room? I mean, obviously it wouldn't be the bartenders, right?" Bob explained patiently, making a small effort to try and make her understand. She laughed and paused little more than etiquette absolutely required of her, before turning away to her friends.
Bert started laughing. Bob looked at him. "Seriously, man, they'll start thinking you're insane." he commented, still laughing, as if he couldn't believe that the conversation, that Bob just had, happened. "I'm insanely bored, if that's what you mean." he laughed his arrogant laugh. "I doubt she's the main character." he then said. "How's that?" Bert asked, slightly amused.
"Well, for one thing, she sort of just blends in with the crowd and has nothing interesting to say. It's possible she's in a bad teen romance novel, but I'll be damned if I feature in one!" he said.
Bert nodded. Bob scanned the room. "You know what? I think Eric is the main character in this room." he said. "Maybe..." Bert replied.
"I mean, he has these heroic features, you know? I mean, like, he's a pretty sturdy guy and has this girlfriend, but this could be the scene that is his good moment and then all goes wrong for him, you know? Also, he drinks, so maybe wacky hijinks may ensue!"
Bert looked pensively for a moment. "Well, obviously, I think you have a point there, but I'm not entirely convinced."
That moment, Peter burst in the room, two beer bottles in his hand. He was walking straight to the bar.
"I think he may be the main character." Bert commented.
"What? We're in a comedy now." Bob replied, but smiled at Peter when he arrived at the bar.
"I'd like another one." Peter said, amazingly articulate. Bob snapped his fingers and Bert went to the back to gett another one. It was a routine they practised, which they thought was hilarious, but only Bob would admit it. "Now, I'd suggest you tone it down about now. About 8 bottles is quite a lot in an evening, you see? And the christian scum in here might consider it kind of negative. You wouldn't want to leave a bad impression, would you?" Bob said, his voice rather sarcastic. Well, he wished he said that, but actually he said: "Having fun, Peter?" Peter leaned on the bar a bit. "You have no idea, these people are crazy!" he said. Bob was amused as Bert handed the uncapped bottle.
"Maybe we're in a horror." Bob then said. "Possibly" Bert said as he bit his underlip and nodded his head slightly to indicate a form of agreement and also indicating he couldn't add much. "I mean, we're both not very much the romantic types, right? And I doubt many others here are and we already established this isn't an action environment. So maybe this is a horror. I mean, this is the last night of the camp. If there's ever a more opportune moment to start killing, it's now." Bob said.
"Ever wonder what happened to the bit characters? I mean, to the bartenders and the pedestrians and the teachers, the unappreciated lot that get 30 seconds of screen time and then disappear completely? Do they become depressed or write a novel? At the end of the day they take a shower and go to bed, but the story doesn't focus on them ever again! Imagine that. Your entire life for that one moment you told the character to buzz off and then that's it! Roll the curtains! Story's over. All else that remains is irrelevant."
Bert laughed. "That's kind of a harsh way to think about it. Maybe they feature in other stories?"
"Perhaps..." Bob admitted.
"Maybe we're part of a modernist novel and everything that happens is a symbol!" Bob said more enthusiastically. Bert did the same slightly nodding gesture as he did before.
"Now, let's drop the subject. The music is horrible." Bob said, as he sipped from a coke that was in the fridge. Bert nodded. "At least, this time you don't make a fool of yourself trying to dance." Bert commented with a big smile.
Bob smiled "Hey, at least I was having fun, then..."
A pause ensued.
"Hey, Bob, do you think we're in a badly written story?" Bert suddenly asked.
Bob grinned and looked at him. He paused, before he said: "Nah, man, don't worry!"
____________
If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
|
|
DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 05:12 PM |
|
|
Criticism of any kind is much appreciated.
I know not everyone can be as wonderful as asheera, but while everyone is in the mood of bettering themselves, you can take a look at this. 
No offense to anyone. I love you all.
____________
If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
|
|
lucky_dwarf
Promising
Supreme Hero
Visiting
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 06:10 PM |
|
|
Id join in if this was an RP
(btw, i think they are in a humor story)
____________
So much has changed in my absence.
|
|
DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 06:21 PM |
|
|
Quote:
Id join in if this was an RP
Hehe, short stories are also a part of the glade.
I think the blonde girl is totally part of a teen vampire romance novel!
This was something I wanted to write for a long time, but I couldn't do it. Suddenly I did it last night under an hour. It was very strange...
____________
If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
|
|
lucky_dwarf
Promising
Supreme Hero
Visiting
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 06:28 PM |
|
|
O rly? I have a short story that id post, moar like the opening post in an Rp but still.
____________
So much has changed in my absence.
|
|
mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 06:29 PM |
|
|
Kids, this is what happens when you read too much TVtropes.
Well written, Dagoth. I liked it. 
____________
Eccentric Opinion
|
|
DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 06:32 PM |
|
|
Yeah, man, check glade history, you'll definitely find a few short stories, like here and here.
Thanks, mvass!
____________
If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
|
|
Cepheus
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Far-flung Keeper
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 06:44 PM |
|
|
I love it, you avant-garde jester you. For the good of our sequel, submit it to the Heroes V storywriters posthaste.
____________
"Those who forget their history are inevitably doomed to repeat it." —Proverb, Might and Magic VIII
|
|
B-E-T-A
Promising
Legendary Hero
Guess Who is Back?
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 07:05 PM |
|
Edited by B-E-T-A at 19:05, 29 Jan 2010.
|
Quote:
Kids, this is what happens when you read too much TVtropes.
Well written, Dagoth. I liked it.
Seconded!
Off-topic:
It is kinda sad, that TVtropes changes ones writing a bit. I often find myself these days starting to write stories, then worry about what tropes I just used. As 'Originality' is my trademark, I like to try to avoid the tropes, thus I end up with bad writen stories.
Other times I find myself trying to poke fun at the tropes, subvert and use for comical stuff. Other times I ignore them. It is those times I end up with good stories.
On-Topic:
It's a good story dagoth, quite a funny one.
 Out of five.
____________
There is no good or evil, only madness. The question is "Just how mad are you?"
|
|
phoenixreborn
Promising
Legendary Hero
Unicorn
|
|
posted January 29, 2010 07:08 PM |
|
|
This would have gone nicely in my writing thread.  I had no idea bards glade was a place for stories. I am busy now but I'll give feedback on the story later.
____________
Bask in the light of my glorious shining unicorn.
|
|
DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
|
|
posted January 31, 2010 07:51 PM |
|
|
Sorry, PR!
This was just something I did in the spur of the moment, so I didn't think about it much and normally I'd be inclined to move it, but I can't throw away all this PRAISE, now can I?
____________
If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
|
| |
|
|
