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| Thread: Examples of Human Stupidity |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 · NEXT» |
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Corribus
Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
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posted March 11, 2010 07:49 PM |
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Edited by Corribus at 17:44, 12 Mar 2010.
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Examples of Human Stupidity
I would like to dedicate this thread to those rare human specimens that are contaminating the gene pool. The ones that evolution would have naturally weeded out if it weren't for humanity's apparent modern immunity to natural selection.
Exhibit A: Megan Barnes
Our first journey takes us to sunny Florida were a woman was in a car accident because she was otherwise preoccupied with shaving her bikini area. This occured one day after being convicted for DUI. Nice.
You can read about it here.
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I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg
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Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
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posted March 11, 2010 07:58 PM |
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reminds me of a guy who ran a car into a telephone pole because he stuck his head under the dashboard to grab an "unlit" ciggerate.
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What are you up to
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blizzardboy
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Nerf Herder
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posted March 11, 2010 08:43 PM |
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And I thought texting while driving was bad. I feel sorry that the poor lady has her face posted on the news over something like that. She will forever be coined as the woman who shaved her privates while driving in her local area.
Her progeny will spread across the earth and soon we will have an entire population shaving pubs while operating heavy machinery. Dun dun dun. Then to save lives, they'll have to put big yellow stickers on automobiles and heavy machinery with a picture of genitals being shaved and a '/' going over it.
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"Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us."
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DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
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posted March 11, 2010 09:12 PM |
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baklava
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Mostly harmless
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posted March 11, 2010 09:18 PM |
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Quote:
those rare human specimens
How I wish this was true
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"Let me tell you what the blues
is. When you ain't got no
money,
you got the blues."
Howlin Wolf
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Corribus
Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
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posted March 11, 2010 09:26 PM |
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Agreed, bak. I fixed my opening post.
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I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg
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Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
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posted March 11, 2010 10:09 PM |
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Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
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posted March 11, 2010 10:14 PM |
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Edited by Celfious at 22:21, 11 Mar 2010.
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what about all those people trying to hang out with the zoo animals, like polar bears and sharks? They are funny too lol
then there is this lady.. I am sure it was a mistake but still....
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Salamandre
Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Wog refugee
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posted March 11, 2010 11:36 PM |
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At least it is funny, while I fall asleep reading the "logic is the way" posts spread more or less recently. Under pressure any can do stupid things. Who knows, maybe this lady wanted badly his intimate meeting to succeed, at point to ignore all else. Being over-emotive can also trouble your common sense, but the ones who never felt or experienced it can not understand.
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Era II mods and utilities
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dragontooth
Disgraceful
Adventuring Hero
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posted March 12, 2010 07:28 AM |
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Paul Cooper said the ban had effectively ended his career.
An amateur footballer who received six red cards in the same match has admitted his playing career is over after receiving a two-year ban.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/s...nd/8521557.stm
Paul Cooper, 39, got a second yellow card for dissent while playing for Hawick United against Pencaitland in the Border Amateur League in November.
He then received another five red cards for verbal exchanges with the referee.
Mr Cooper said he loved football but would now have to "find something else to do on a Saturday".
The player, nicknamed Santa, said he realised it was his own fault he had got into disciplinary trouble.
"I completely overreacted after I had been sent off and I know I said things to the referee I should not have," he said.
"But I felt so frustrated as I honestly wasn't to blame for the incident that led to me being sent off.
A few mad moments have basically cost Paul his footballing career
George Shepherd
Hawick United manager
"After the game I went to see the referee in his dressing room and I apologised to him for losing it and he accepted the apology."
Mr Cooper said he was unable to attend a disciplinary hearing in Glasgow due to work commitments and then received a letter confirming his lengthy ban.
"Unfortunately I've been in bother before with bans and I expected six months," he said.
"But I was absolutely stunned when I got two years."
He added that he believed it had effectively ended his 22-year playing career.
He said: "I will just have to go with the flow, accept things and find something else to do on a Saturday."
'Matter closed'
Hawick United manager George Shepherd said he believed the two-year suspension was "way over the top".
"A few mad moments have basically cost Paul his footballing career," he said.
"He is a very good player and will be a big miss to Hawick United."
Hugh Knapp, secretary of the Scottish Amateur Football Association, said the matter had been properly dealt with under its disciplinary procedures.
"Mr Cooper was given the opportunity to attend a hearing but decided not to," he said.
"He was also given the opportunity to appeal to the Scottish Football Association and again chose not to do that so the matter is closed."
Mr Cooper's club Hawick United were also fined £150.
I never knew you could get 6 reds in a match.
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Corribus
Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
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posted March 12, 2010 05:28 PM |
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Edited by Corribus at 17:45, 12 Mar 2010.
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Wasn't really sure whether to put this one in the religion thread or not, but since it's rather more funny than serious (IMHO), I'll put it in my new "Stupid People" thread.
So here we have Exhibit B: Toby Elles
This from Carters News:
A 22-year-old British bank worker called it a "miracle" when a late-night cooking session went awry. According to the U.K.'s Daily Mail, Toby Elles decided to make some bacon, but, presumably droopy after a few beers earlier in the evening, he took a nap while the food cooked on the stove. When he awoke, he said, the room was full of smoke. After he scraped the burnt bacon from the pan, Elles told the Daily Mail he saw the face of Jesus Christ in the pan. "If it wasn't for the smoke it could have been a very bad situation," he said. "Perhaps someone's looking over me." (Carters News)
And here we have a photograph of the Holy Skillet:
That's right, folks. Jesus was so concerned that this mental midget might roast himself alive during an inebriated midnight cooking session that he reached down his holy hand and caused the bacon to smoke. And just so that Toby didn't erringly conclude that it was a natural chemical decomposition of overheated bacon fat that caused the smoke to form, Jesus left a little picture of himself in the bottom of the pan, as if to say, "Hey kid, I'm watching out for your dumb ass. Next time, eat a twinkie."
I always find it amusing when people find human faces formed in bizarre places. Well, perhaps that's unfair. I see the resemblance of a face in Toby's pan as well, but while he believes its a message from the Lord, I know that pattern recognition is a computing algorithm that's hardwired into our brain through eons of evolution. The more amazing thing is that while I think most people would be able to recognize a facial resemblance in the charred bacon remnants, why do some people leap to the conclusion that it is the face of a divine being? Why is it Jesus? Why isn't it Paul Bunyan? Or Richard Karn? Or any other of the millions of men who choose to wear a beard? Why is it always Christ who chooses to show himself in a grilled cheese sandwich? Why isn't it Billy Mays come back from the dead to try to get you to buy some OxyClean?
Actually, after doing some more sleuthing, I was able to answer that question. Jesus just loves frying pans. Seriously, Toby Elles isn't the first nitwit that Christ has chosen to visit in the way.
To wit:
Ok, I admit, the last one is a little unfair, since Jesus was purposely put into that one. On the other hand, one must question why someone would purposely want Jesus's face to be imprinted on their pancakes. I know Jesus said to eat his flesh and drink his blood, but isn't this taking that to a new, silly level?
In any case, I notice that Jesus seems to turn up in food and food-related items a lot. In addition to the aforementioned pans, idiots have found Jesus in:
Perogis
Potatoes
Marmite
Grilled Cheese
(Jesus really loves grilled cheese. In fact, the woman who found the latter image keeps the grilled cheese in a special tupperware in her bedroom. One wonders why? Does the Holy Cheese ward off evil spirits?)
Tortillas
And even fruit:
The only conclusion I can arrive at is that Jesus had some weird obsession with food. I'll have to remember that the next time I declare to my officemates just before lunch: "Good God am I hungry!"
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I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg
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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted March 13, 2010 02:00 PM |
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Quote:
And here we have a photograph of the Holy Skillet:
Someone send this to the band called Skillet.
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
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posted March 13, 2010 02:04 PM |
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Marmite is the devil.
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If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
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JoonasTo
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted March 14, 2010 11:17 AM |
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bixie
Promising
Legendary Hero
my common sense is tingling!
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posted March 14, 2010 11:27 AM |
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one word.
creationists
that is all
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Love, Laugh, Learn, Live.
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Xerox
Promising
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 14, 2010 01:51 PM |
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Almost everybody in the american "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" (notice I wrote "than" instead of "then"! Im a good boy!)...
Some examples I have seen:
"What continent is also a country?"
"Uhm what? Okay it's Europe."
"Incorrect. The country that is also a continent is Australia."
"What? I thought all continents were countries. Like America."
"What country borders the Hudson Bay (and this was the american Are you smarter than a 5th grader)?"
"Hudson Bay... thats like in Iceland, right? Iceland!"
"Wrong, Canada."
"Canada? Isn't that to the south of America?"
"Where does the rare Giant Panda live?"
"I think it's Japan but I say ASIA!"
And she got Correct for that answer! That's like saying there are Pandas living from Turkey to east Russia."
And the last one.
"In what country is Budapest the capital?"
"I have no idea. They speak french there, don't they? But i'm not sure if France is a coun
It gets me wondering if they cast stupid people or if nearly all americans have no idea of geography outside the States (I have heard only 10% of the population has a passport).
I dont expect them to know exactly where Hungary is, i'm not a 100% sure myself (east europe, west of Black Sea I think but not bordering it) but still - knowing that there are other countries in North america in the US and like 50 countries in Europe should be mandatory.
Though the americans in Are you smarter than a 5th grader really know their history well. Is history an important subject in the US? To be honest, it isnt in Sweden. We dont learn a lot of our own history, just briefly in like the 5th grade (medieval, vikings). We first talk about the WW2 in the last grade and thats the only recent war we talk about. And the industrial revolution in the UK (London is a lovely place to go to and the flight costs like 2-3 euro) and Sweden.
But all the kings in Sweden always had so confusing names. Everybodys name is like "Karl The Xth Gustav".
And for some reason Karl becomes Charles in english. O.o
Why do we even translate names?
Why dont we call Greece Hellas instead? It's name is Hellas not "Greece". Why doesnt everybody call Finland Suomi (I know this one but still)? Sweden Sverige? Germany Deutschland? Spain Espan(j)a with a strange N and Japan Nippon?
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Over himself, over his own
body and
mind, the individual is
sovereign.
- John Stuart Mill
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 14, 2010 04:04 PM |
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Edited by Fauch at 16:05, 14 Mar 2010.
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Quote:
"What continent is also a country?"
"Uhm what? Okay it's Europe."
"Incorrect. The country that is also a continent is Australia."
"What? I thought all continents were countries. Like America."
I would say Antarctica but I'm not sure it's a country actually. Australia isn't a continent, it's a part of oceania like new zealand and indonesia I think.
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Xerox
Promising
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 14, 2010 05:06 PM |
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Antartica isn't a country but it's still a continent (a very large landmass). English is a bit confusing. In Swedish there are two words. Kontinent and världsdel ("world part"). Here Europe is a "världsdel" or "world part" while Eurasia is a "kontinent/continent".
I dont know if there are two continent words in english. One that refers to a part of the world and one that refers to a large landmass.
Again, this is english so maybe there is no continent (part of the world) called Australia there.
In Sweden the world part is called Oceania and the continent Australia.
But I am a 100% sure the question in the show was "Which country is also a continent?" and the answer was Australia.
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Over himself, over his own
body and
mind, the individual is
sovereign.
- John Stuart Mill
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angelito
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
proud father of a princess
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posted March 14, 2010 05:53 PM |
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Thread cleaned.
Come on guys, this thread was meant to be funny. No need to turn it into a typical OSM quote war scenario..
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Better judged by 12 than carried by 6.
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JollyJoker
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 14, 2010 06:50 PM |
- penalty applied by angelito on 14 Mar 2010. |
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You mean, I get cleaned, because my taste (of humour) differs?
And I can't express that I think this thread is TASTELESS? In the OSM?
Perfect example for human stupidity, if you ask me.
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