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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: HC's mainstream medias dedicated thread!
Thread: HC's mainstream medias dedicated thread! This thread is 3 pages long: 1 2 3 · NEXT»
Galaad
Galaad

Hero of Order
Li mort as morz, li vif as vis
posted December 06, 2020 11:15 PM
Edited by Galaad at 08:47, 19 Feb 2021.

HC's mainstream medias dedicated thread!

Disclaimer

This is a joke thread. It is supposed to report what could be news regarding HC and its posters under a light-hearted, comical effect.

Be creative to express your feelings in a way that keeps a fun and friendly environment into it. Itís up to you to be HCís best reporters or to spread fake news all over the website and excel at it! You can make things up, but I find the most creative is to subtly alter reality. Pokes and benevolent jests are allowed, but this is not the place to settle your differences either, if things get out of hand, posts deletions and further sanctions for repeated joy killers will ensue.

I have decided to highlight the news submitted by adding them to the OP as well as to hire the reporters I think are doing an excellent job. They will be added to the OP as well. To make things a bit more exciting and to promote quality, I have decided to nominate our best reporters after some time for shinies if the thread can remain enjoyable and healthy.
Ground rules to be an HC reporter are :

1. Be funny
2. Be creative
3. Donít be an ass.
Hired reporters


Gnomes                Neraus          The Count          NoobX

NOW ON TO HC'S LATEST NEWS!
Exclusive interview with NoobX!
HC has witnessed a record breaking 1000 posts in a 24 hour span on February 12!  Interviews with the people responsible for it will be conducted soon.
Submitted by NoobX, February 17, 2021
Stevie couldn't handle what he saw and it drove him to madness.
Submitted by Oddball, January 18, 2021
GALAAD is so BOTELY?  Find out HOW in THREE EASY STEPS!  You'd be surprised to know WHY!  [PHOTO] [VIDEO] [GONE WRONG] [GONE SEXUAL]
Submitted by NoobX, January 17, 2021
Gnomes and Oddball started throes of passion in the VW, scaring Stevie
Submitted by Galaad, January 17, 2021
NoobX has been seen wandering around the Glade, but it seems he was extremely drunk on Rakjia and did not manage to figure out how to hit on the "post reply" button.
FirePaladin questions himself and the community about H3 Giants sexuality and sexual orientation. which made Elvin almost die of laughter.
Oddball has found a new sex friend, and is keeping him locked in the closet. Spoilers: It's Gnomes.
Violent Flower disappeared after a short appearance even though The Gootch is still posting. Speaking of blasts from the past, Lith-Maethor reappeared as well and I don't even know him, which didn't stop me from understanding he has a severe color font addiction.
Corribus has recently ordered a ton new load of munitions for OSM purposes.

Submitted by Galaad, December 20, 2020
*cue evening news theme*
*roll headlines*

Lithuanian tavern dweller and gun enthusiast Kip S. Hats linked to terrifying terror attack on two mosques in Christchurch, New Zealand. Suspect may have colluded with HC moderation to cover up incriminating photographic evidence.
High Moderator Corribus bends under pressure from VW Attorney General Stevie in infidelity and homosexuality case. The defendant frantically denies prosecution's semi-serious accusations of abuse of power, thus admitting a guilty consciousness. How could the lawsuit against top HC Moderators OmegaDestroyer and Corribus and their illicit relationship redefine our forums and Code of Conduct?
Good evening, this is Elvin with the 10 o'clock HCNN news report.

Submitted by The Count, December 13, 2020
News of the month!Salamandreis back now! And he beat a Homecoming (WoG/ERA) map, he also created erm mod without asked me. But Salamandre came up with a legendary name. Because the nightmare level map, even if the first time I, Ghost created without know-how on map. Is really nightmare? He got his name tester and modder by Salamandre in the maps4heroes. Wait for map is ready, when I, Ghost is thinking WTF large map reshuffle. Maybe Salamandre laughs.. and you can download incomplete map now and then verify it.
Submitted by Ghost, December 10, 2020
Breaking news! The door to the Library of Enlightenment has been breached by mysterious machines, witnesses report smoke coming from the inside and entire new books filled with gibberish being added, rumors say that Drakon-Deus has been found wounded on the floor muttering "they're here...". Our experts on the ground say there is no reason to be worried, in time these machines will adapt to our ways and start writing proper books as artificial intelligence improves.
Submitted by Neraus, December 10, 2020
Emergency package of copium was delivered to Gandalf today, but we are quickly running out. Anyone listening, please send more if you can.
Submitted by Minion, December 09, 2020
It started with a slight itching between my poopholder and left breast, which leaves a quite large area to scratch. However, after removing my fingerprints from the crime scene, which is, until proven wrong, still a right every poster here possesses and should exercise when abuse is suspected, it begun to slowly fade away.
Submitted by Salamandre, December 09, 2020
(Note: Salamandre is reporting news about himself).
Citizen Salamandre admitted to a reading allergy today. Speculations about the reasons circle around regular script being considered unaesthetical due to being used to elegant musical notation.
Submitted by JollyJoker, December 09, 2020
In other news, Fred was seen wandering around the streets armed with a machete on a squirrel hunt sources say, as our resident experts explain, going on a squirrel hunt is indicative of links to a secret cabal in the US armed forces dedicated to clandestine night time barbecues.
Artu has been implicated in a scandal regarding the smuggling of tons of rakjia into Turkey, border police dismiss the claims, citing that all proper paperwork was properly filled and that he wasn't linked to the (most probably portuguese) terrorist cell.


*phone ringing*

Breaking news, Ghost has been sighted in the finnish woods, allegedly armed with a sniper rifle and currently involved in a firefight with a joint force of finnish loyalists and the russian army, this may be linked to the recent movement trying to put a new great khan to rule all over Finland.
When our reporters tried to get a statement they were met with a scantily clad extremely attractive blonde woman carrying a bottle of vodka.

Submitted by Neraus, December 09, 2020
Corribus valiant effort to unify all of election talk diverged to spam by the end of first page and discussion about wikipedias feminist rulers by the third.
Was anyone even surprised?

Submitted by JoonasTo, December 09, 2020
HC Finally drives Corribus over the edge, mass shooting in OSM.
Submitted by Kipshasz, December 09, 2020
In my constant quest to provide fair, consistent and reliable news, unlike certain competitors in our field, I have been working to scrounge up the newest tidbits from all around HC, here to present to your ever-wondering gazes for all their glory!

This has been a tumultuous week, folks. A truly tumultuous one indeed, and it hasn't even been a full week yet! Today's headlines read:

Corribus has cleansed the VW and all its surrounding nation-states of all election talk, confining it to the dank, dark den of the OSM. A power grab by our new, glorious eye-verlord, or simply a necessary act to contain the infection?

Kipshasz has been seen stalking in the Tavern once more! Here to stay, or just grabbing more vodka before returning to his den, where we can only assume he polishes his arsenal, paints his unvarnished grey armies of minis, and secretly watches anime like the closet weeb we all suspected him of being? Only time will tell!

Pokemon has seen a new update! But only three people really care about that, so go about your day. Nothing to see there but angst and depression and wangst (weeb angst, the most deplorable kind of both weebs and angst!)

Blizzardboy has once again run afoul of the mod squad for public displays of his nuts! When will the law finally catch this rambunctious rascal and bring him to justice?

And finally, because he cannot take enough of the spotlight, Corribus, in a fit of true divine fury, had the last word every "recently posted" thread but one for a matter of hours, with his utter dominion contested only by Elvin, who managed to hold out valiantly in the Anime and Manga thread until reinforcements could bring him aid!

These have been your stories for today, the 8th day of December, 2020, folks, and as we wind down to the end of the year, we pledge* to continue bringing sensational headlines of the quality that you demand.

Submitted by Gnomes, December 08, 2020
Galaad opened a new thread in the VW with a political sounding name, but it ended up being fun! An impossibility that hints at darker patrons, or a bout of levity badly needed in these troubled times? Read on and find out!
Submitted by Gnomes, December 07, 2020
JollyJoker strives for world domination!
He did confess having the ambition Hitler did not have! His latest evil plans revealed in the OSM.

Salamandre got back into the OSM!
After a brief retreat where he trained his fingers playing some non Heroes game, he's back for some more!

Fred vs the rest of the world!
No one can understand, no one can ever get it ever, shocking revelations about the new world order to be read in the OSM.

Pandatar created a new type of bamboo!
His creative mind was never at rest, so he came up with the most amazing elemental discovery ever, go find out in his Stronghold faction!

Blizzardboy created meatless fish!
A very particular type of fish that has no meat.

Ghost mistook a hooker for a WOG map!
All further details in the Wastelands.

Submitted by Galaad, December 06, 2020

Which of these are fake news? OR are they all real? Or is it all because Celfious decided it to be that way?
What news can you report to us, here at HC? Report your most exciting news here!

Pls no bots posts.
____________

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Stevie
Stevie


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted December 06, 2020 11:33 PM

Why is Corribus around so much lately? After literally months of absence.
____________
Guide to a Great Heroes Game
The Young Traveler

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Legendary Hero
Time for war
posted December 06, 2020 11:35 PM

Why are globalists called this way? I thought the Earth was flat???

The Count
____________

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Gnomes2169
Gnomes2169


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Duke of the Glade
posted December 07, 2020 04:11 AM

GALAAD opened a new thread in the VW with a political sounding name, but it ended up being fun! An impossibility that hints at darker patrons, or a bout of levity badly needed in these troubled times? Read on and find out!
____________
Yeah in the 18th century, two inventions suggested a method of measurement. One won and the other stayed in America.
-Ghost destroying Fred

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Rimgrabber
Rimgrabber


Famous Hero
It's a fixer-upper
posted December 07, 2020 08:40 AM

Sorry Galaad, I only get my news from RELIABLE sources.



And uhhh hey Winston it's a heroes of might and magic forum not the public square of political debate calm down lol

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Corribus
Corribus

Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
posted December 07, 2020 03:41 PM

Thread cleaned. There is a dedicated thread for both election discussion and for discussion of how election discussion will be moderated. Please use those threads. Fred, you have now received your warning.
____________
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg

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fred79
fred79


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
My BS sensor is tingling again
posted December 07, 2020 04:13 PM

i posted a link to a video outside of your thread, from the msm, and you still remove it.

as per your own rules, i didn't create a THREAD about it. i was FOLLOWING your bs rules, and you STILL overstep your boundaries.

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Corribus
Corribus

Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
posted December 07, 2020 04:47 PM

Fred, your continued posting off topic material despite my repeated warnings has earned you 24 hours silence. I can't stick around all morning to clean threads of your off-topic posts. You have a vehicle to provide comment on the new policy about election related material. That is the place for these comments.
____________
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg

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Gnomes2169
Gnomes2169


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Duke of the Glade
posted December 08, 2020 09:58 PM
Edited by Gnomes2169 at 21:58, 08 Dec 2020.

In my constant quest to provide fair, consistent and reliable news, unlike certain competitors in our field, I have been working to scrounge up the newest tidbits from all around HC, here to present to your ever-wondering gazes for all their glory!

This has been a tumultuous week, folks. A truly tumultuous one indeed, and it hasn't even been a full week yet! Today's headlines read:

Corribus has cleansed the VW and all its surrounding nation-states of all election talk, confining it to the dank, dark den of the OSM. A power grab by our new, glorious eye-verlord, or simply a necessary act to contain the infection?

Kipshasz has been seen stalking in the Tavern once more! Here to stay, or just grabbing more vodka before returning to his den, where we can only assume he polishes his arsenal, paints his unvarnished grey armies of minis, and secretly watches anime like the closet weeb we all suspected him of being? Only time will tell!

Pokemon has seen a new update! But only three people really care about that, so go about your day. Nothing to see there but angst and depression and wangst (weeb angst, the most deplorable kind of both weebs and angst!)

Blizzardboy has once again run afoul of the mod squad for public displays of his nuts! When will the law finally catch this rambunctious rascal and bring him to justice?

And finally, because he cannot take enough of the spotlight, Corribus, in a fit of true divine fury, had the last word every "recently posted" thread but one for a matter of hours, with his utter dominion contested only by Elvin, who managed to hold out valiantly in the Anime and Manga thread until reinforcements could bring him aid!

These have been your stories for today, the 8th day of December, 2020, folks, and as we wind down to the end of the year, we pledge* to continue bringing sensational headlines of the quality that you demand.

(*Disclaimer, this pledge is only valid for as long as I continue to find it funny)

____________
Yeah in the 18th century, two inventions suggested a method of measurement. One won and the other stayed in America.
-Ghost destroying Fred

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Kipshasz
Kipshasz


Undefeatable Hero
Elvin's Darkside
posted December 09, 2020 08:13 AM

HC Finally drives Corribus over the edge, mass shooting in OSM
____________
"Kip is the Gavin McInnes of HC" - Salamandre
"Ashan to the Trashcan", "I got PTSD from H7. " - LizardWarrior

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JoonasTo
JoonasTo


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
posted December 09, 2020 10:48 AM

Corribus valiant effort to unify all of election talk diverged to spam by the end of first page and discussion about wikipedias feminist rulers by the third.
Was anyone even surprised?
____________
DON'T BE A NOOB, JOIN A.D.V.E.N.T.U.R.E.

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Neraus
Neraus


Promising
Legendary Hero
Pizza Nazi
posted December 09, 2020 02:24 PM

In other news, fred was seen wandering around the streets armed with a machete on a squirrel hunt sources say, as our resident experts explain, going on a squirrel hunt is indicative of links to a secret cabal in the US armed forces dedicated to clandestine night time barbecues.
artu has been implicated in a scandal regarding the smuggling of tons of rakjia into Turkey, border police dismiss the claims, citing that all proper paperwork was properly filled and that he wasn't linked to the (most probably portuguese) terrorist cell.


*phone ringing*

Breaking news, ghost has been sighted in the finnish woods, allegedly armed with a sniper rifle and currently involved in a firefight with a joint force of finnish loyalists and the russian army, this may be linked to the recent movement trying to put a new great khan to rule all over Finland.
When our reporters tried to get a statement they were met with a scantily clad extremely attractive blonde woman carrying a bottle of vodka.

____________
Noli offendere Patriam Agathae quia ultrix iniuriarum est.

ANTUDO

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Corribus
Corribus

Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
posted December 09, 2020 03:25 PM

JoonasTo said:
Corribus valiant effort to unify all of election talk diverged to spam by the end of first page and discussion about wikipedias feminist rulers by the third.
Was anyone even surprised?

At least it's all in one place
____________
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg

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Minion
Minion


Legendary Hero
posted December 09, 2020 04:27 PM

JoonasTo said:
Corribus valiant effort to unify all of election talk diverged to spam by the end of first page and discussion about wikipedias feminist rulers by the third.
Was anyone even surprised?


I laughed out loud

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Salamandre
Salamandre


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Wog refugee
posted December 09, 2020 06:09 PM

Corribus said:
@JJ and Salamandre

I'm not joking around. Stick to the topic. If you want to discuss the merits of Wikipedia as a general information source, do it in another thread, and do it with decorum.

Thread cleaned.


It was you who first loled about reliability of sources as Breitbart and Daily Wire, to which Minion added his comment about  Wikipedia as ultimate source of information. That is worth debating, from an objective point of view. In that place where it started.

Moreover that was on the topic, as my first comment - Larry Elder's article, emphasized on the medias ganging on conservative ideas and caricaturing them until false narratives are created.  

I am tired of you deciding what can to be discussed and what can not, deleting posts which took time, just like that. The successful use of power should be subtle, smart and inspiring, that clearly doesn't apply to you.

But hey, is not my forum. You the boss. I'm out.
____________
Era II mods and utilities

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Gnomes2169
Gnomes2169


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Duke of the Glade
posted December 09, 2020 06:16 PM

... What? Why in this thread, and not just an HCM? Why in this thread? Because it's the top of the VW? Lord, have mercy. *In the background, a congregation chants, "Lord, have mercy."*
____________
Yeah in the 18th century, two inventions suggested a method of measurement. One won and the other stayed in America.
-Ghost destroying Fred

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JollyJoker
JollyJoker


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
posted December 09, 2020 06:46 PM
Edited by JollyJoker at 18:47, 09 Dec 2020.

Untenable position on Salamandre's part making grapes too sour for him, ending in sulking exit.

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Corribus
Corribus

Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
posted December 09, 2020 07:25 PM

Did you even bother to read the thread before you brought this discussion here, Salamandre?
____________
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg

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Salamandre
Salamandre


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Wog refugee
posted December 09, 2020 07:55 PM

I did now, my bad so I apologize. I usually don't pay attention to power-monger wannabe's insane rules and I now realize I should have because that would have saved me a lot of time and energy.

Playing the duck in forced echo chamber environment looks not so fun to me.  

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Minion
Minion


Legendary Hero
posted December 09, 2020 08:04 PM

The victimhood is strong in this one.
____________
"These friends probably started using condoms after having produced the most optimum amount of offsprings. Kudos to them for showing at least some restraint" - Tsar-ivor

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