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| Thread: Favorite one liners? |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 · NEXT» |
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 01, 2002 02:55 AM |
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Favorite one liners?
Post your favorite one liners here such as:
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Dajek
Known Hero
Psychedelic Knight
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posted June 01, 2002 10:37 AM |
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explain a bit...
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 02, 2002 04:05 AM |
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Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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darkspirit
Famous Hero
aka Zutus
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posted June 02, 2002 09:05 PM |
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my favourite one-liners which I use daily are: "Amai, 't stinkt hie weer ze" (= Wow, it smells stinky in here again)
"Gij se lelijk kind" (=You ugly child)
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Young moles appear to be in full dispersal which means there are more moles per acre than at any other time of the year
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Cat
Honorable
Supreme Hero
Gonna Get Dirrty...
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posted June 02, 2002 09:43 PM |
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Most of the "one liners" I know are nasty hings you say to nasty people
1. Here's 10p, go call somebody who cares.. no wait! Here's a pound.. call them long distance
2. Exactly how far behind the door were you when the brains were give out.
3. I just took a painkiller.. why are you still here??
4. I have an attitude problem.. your attitude, my problem.
And there are loads of others that I resere for special occasions.. I'm teaching them allll to Romy.. lmao 
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 Diwethaf Gloau Sylw y Gymreag
http://aozos.com/phpBB2/index.php
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Pleuris
Promising
Known Hero
Look ma! No hair!
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posted June 03, 2002 10:54 AM |
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k, I've got one, but it's an insult and I'm not typing this to anyone on HC, but here it is:
If you ever get a son, I hope his dog dies
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 04, 2002 03:44 AM |
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Why is a boxing ring square?
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Avallach
Hired Hero
Disputo ergo sum.
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posted June 04, 2002 03:57 AM |
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100,000 lemmings can't be wrong.
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"Death slew him not, but he made death his ladder to the skies"
- Edmund Spenser, on the death of Philip Sidney
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RainBow
Known Hero
Supreme Flirt & Cyber Gypsy
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posted June 04, 2002 04:11 AM |
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If we can travel at the speed of light...then what is the speed of dark?
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If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
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RMS
Responsible
Legendary Hero
-ing yummy foods
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posted June 04, 2002 04:12 AM |
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hmm, I have a bunch of these for my away messages, but here's one that I like, even if it hasn't had much success with anyone else:
If an orange is orange, whey isn't a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow? - or maybe I'll just have a big bunch of purples.
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This space for rent.
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bort
Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
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posted June 04, 2002 03:57 PM |
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My favorites are the ones you hear, then about 10 seconds later the "wait a minute..." hits you. Such as:
Don't you hate it when you spend all this time and effort to become a zen master and then nobody notices?
So I'm balls deep in this guy's snow when he turns around and asks for a kiss. What a snow.
Lollapalooza : The world's largest alternative music festival.
Also in this category are the entire series of "we must send a statement that killing is wrong. That's why I support the death penalty" statements.
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Pleuris
Promising
Known Hero
Look ma! No hair!
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posted June 05, 2002 01:29 PM |
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How does the snowplow-driver go to his work?
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tommo
Hired Hero
Has brains is dangerous.......
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posted June 05, 2002 02:53 PM |
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My favourite is:
If you had brains you'd be dangerous
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 05, 2002 04:08 PM |
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Not really one line but here it is anyway.
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will always be yours. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with.
But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't appear to realize that you had set it free. You either married it or gave birth to it.
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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Cat
Honorable
Supreme Hero
Gonna Get Dirrty...
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posted June 05, 2002 04:11 PM |
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Lady (To Winston Churchill):- Sir, you are drunk!
Churchill:- And you madam are ugly, but at least I will be sober in the morning
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Oscar Wilde:- I wish I'd said that
Whistler (the painter):- You will, Oscar, you will
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Assorted Oscar Wilde:-
I have nothing to declare except my genius
Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast
(From The Importance of Being Ernest)
Cecily:- When I see a spade, I call it a spade
Gwendolin:- I am happy to say I have never seen a spade
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Diwethaf Gloau Sylw y Gymreag
http://aozos.com/phpBB2/index.php
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Pleuris
Promising
Known Hero
Look ma! No hair!
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posted June 05, 2002 04:31 PM |
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from the movie Snatch, a guy flies from London to America. When he arrives at the airport he is asked: "Do you have anything to declare?" The guy replies: "Yes, don't go to London!"
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Sir_Elric
Responsible
Famous Hero
Having a bad hair day.
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posted June 05, 2002 05:11 PM |
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From the movie "Shallow Hal"
Have you ever heard of the phrase "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder?"
Reply
"Have you ever heard the song Who let the dogs out!"
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Neverwinter Nights - "City of Melnibone"
Direct connect - ausnwn2.dyndns.org:5121
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MightyMage
Honorable
Legendary Hero
of INSANITY and DELICIOUSNESS
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posted June 06, 2002 12:21 AM |
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Some of my Favorites are those used when calling someone crazy or stupid without actually saying it.
The lights are on but nobody's home.
He's a few cards short of a full deck.
He flew over the Cuckoo's nest and he ain't ever coming back.
Her elevator doesn't quite go to the top.
Now for one I like and use often. It doesn't really mean anything but it's funny anyway.
"Don't you look at me in that tone of voice!"
And one that me and a couple of buddies came up with means somthing sucks or is really gay.
"This raises skeletons!"
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Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage. For he is all I could ever
want to be! - OhforfSake
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Cat
Honorable
Supreme Hero
Gonna Get Dirrty...
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posted June 06, 2002 12:34 AM |
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Oh.. who can forget all the Father Ted oneliners?
Father Jack:- "Drink! ****! Arse! Giiirrrrrlllllsss!!"
(Father Dougal has lost a corner flag Ted asked him to look after and is looking under the sofa cusions for it:-
Ted:- Dougal, what are you doing?
Dougal:- I'm.. eating my breakfast Ted.
And there are many more....
Another good one is an answer for obvious questions...
when somebody asks "where are you going?" or "what are you doing?" I just answer "I'm going to the moon to pick strawberries"
and this one is the Best.. the Wellcome message on my Nokia...
Moon Pudding, Yum!
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Diwethaf Gloau Sylw y Gymreag
http://aozos.com/phpBB2/index.php
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MightyMage
Honorable
Legendary Hero
of INSANITY and DELICIOUSNESS
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posted June 06, 2002 01:08 AM |
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why ask why? or why not?
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Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage. For he is all I could ever
want to be! - OhforfSake
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