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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: Football bar: Bottlejobs' league Final edition(with an appetizer from the Eastl)
Thread: Football bar: Bottlejobs' league Final edition(with an appetizer from the Eastl) This thread is 9 pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 · NEXT»
CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted May 29, 2019 07:19 PM
Edited by CountBezuhoff at 19:53, 29 May 2019.

Football bar: Bottlejobs' league Final edition(with an appetizer from the East)

Greetings, laidees and gentle Me,

Tonight we celebrate the long-awaited return of the football fan's favourite thread, the infamous "Football bar", and what a better way to commemorate the occasion than a final of a top competition? But this is no ordinary final, no, it's a true London derby! Chelsea vs Arsenal!

Interestingly, the event takes place nowhere near London- in fact it will commence at 20:00 GMT on the opposite end of the continent in far off Baku, Azerbaijan. It is believed that Her Majesty the Queen has been personaly involved in this choice of venue in a last ditch effort to put an end to all speculation and to once and for all pin a definition on the divisive term "Brexit". You see, the Brittish didn't really want to leave the EU because it is snow, they actually wanted to leave the UK because it is snow.

For Arsenal, the EL may be a season saver, since they uncharacteristingly failed to hit top four this season and guarentee Champions' league football. Chelsea may have finished third, but so far they are running emty-handed and will look to win their first(and only) throphy for the season. This match will also serve as Eden Hazard's unofficial benefit match for Chelsea as he is rumoured to leave for Real Madrid in the summer and certainly seems set on a course to do so as Chelsea have performed inconsistently in the last two seasons and have little perspective of succeeding domestically next year. That would certainly motivate the talented Belgian to put up a performance for Chelsea fans to remember.

The final seems highly contested and will certainly result in a memorable show. Be sure to tune in and watch it through any means you see fit!

Written by The Count

UPDATE: Apparently the Gunners' Mikhitarian- an Armenian- is not a part of tonight's squad as the match takes place in Azerbaijan. The tensions between those two countries have raised concerns about his safety and reputation, so he opted not to attend the match. Really makes you think what a Serbia- Kosovo World Cup final might escalate into (check this out "Football war"). Thankfully, neither teams have the capacity to reach such a final (for now).
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NoobX
NoobX


Undefeatable Hero
Now, this is a paradox...
posted May 29, 2019 07:59 PM

There won't be enough of Serbia left to make a football team by the time Kosovo makes it to a WC finale.
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Ghost said:
Door knob resembles anus tap.

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted May 29, 2019 08:36 PM

Starting XIs

Chelsea(4-3-3): Kepa; Azpilicueta, Christensen, David Luiz, Emerson; Jorginho, Kante, Kovacic; Pedro, Giroud, Hazard;
Subs: Caballero, Cumming, Barkley, Higuain, Zappacosta, Willian, Cahill, Ampadu, Gallagher, McEachran

Arsenal(3-4-1-2): Cech; Koscielny, Sokratis, Monreal; Maitland- Niles, Torreira, Xhaka, Kolasinac; Oezil; Lacazette, Aubumeyang;

This is going to be Cech's last ever match! He is retiring at the end of the season.

Written by The Count

(Serbia won't fall that easily)
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NoobX
NoobX


Undefeatable Hero
Now, this is a paradox...
posted May 29, 2019 08:45 PM

Quote:
(Serbia won't fall that easily)


It's already falling apart.  
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Ghost said:
Door knob resembles anus tap.

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted June 01, 2019 09:21 PM
Edited by CountBezuhoff at 21:22, 01 Jun 2019.

Now for the main event: the battle of the bottlejobs. Two teams which have become synonymous with not winning anything and always surprising us with the lengths they are willing to go to achieve that.

Spurs vs Liverpool. An apocalyptic event in the making. If either teams manage to win anything, the world shall watch in awe and horror as meteors shatter the Earth's crust, contemplating: "What wizardry let them through to the final?".

I intend to sit back and enjoy the show (and sadistically laugh as Liverpool miserably bottle a 3 goal lead).

Written by the Count
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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted June 01, 2019 09:53 PM
Edited by CountBezuhoff at 21:55, 01 Jun 2019.

No football fans here? Not even a Liverpool-apologist? That's no fun! Screw this, I'm heading straight for the Celestial Heavens.

EDIT: That penalty was full of ****.

The Count
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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 01, 2019 09:56 PM

the wizardy part only applies to spurs. That club has only played football for 45 minutes (second half against ajax) in the last 3-4 seasons of UCL, and now they're in the final?!?

no one really knows how they got there, which is why I think (and hope) liverpool will win, even though I'm not a fan of either team

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted June 01, 2019 10:07 PM
Edited by CountBezuhoff at 22:08, 01 Jun 2019.

Spurs pulled off some serious trickery, that's for sure. In theory, Liverpool should waste them, but... it's Liverpool after all. I don't really care who wins it, but the enjoyment I would draw from bullying the fragile mind of a delusional Liverpool fan amounts to much more than kicking the hollow shell of a Spurs supporter.

Otherwise, the match has been quite dull so far.IMHO, English teams should never be allowed to reach finals.

The Count
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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 01, 2019 10:20 PM

lol, so you're not into this sport for the beauty of it, you're into it for mocking the fans. Your call

Personally, I think english teams should reach the finals more. Personally I am sick and tired of spanish teams (I have never liked the spaniards anyway, both at club and international level), but - and this is me being unbiased - english teams play football (with a few exceptions lately, such as spurs or arsenal).

I think liverpool will win this final, one way or another (purely by talent, by experience, or by luck). They have too many advantages on their side

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted June 01, 2019 10:54 PM
Edited by CountBezuhoff at 23:01, 01 Jun 2019.

I am into sports because I enjoy dynamic, thrilling matches and to back my favourite teams. But when it comes to several English teams, I just can't help it.

Spanish dominance was annoying and I'm glad it appears to have ended. The other teams are excellent, they only lack confidence.



Origi scores! What a legend. It's surely over now? Though Spurs missed a handful of chances themselves. They had a taste of their own medicine.

Allison>> Karius

The Count

It's over! Alright, I'll be adding some new silverware in Spurs' trophy cabinet. How does "reaching the UCL final" sound?


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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 01, 2019 11:06 PM
Edited by monere at 23:08, 01 Jun 2019.

sure that alison is better than karius, there's no debate here, but in my opinion spurs' lack of performance is their long history of always being in the shadow of the top 4-5 big teams in EPL.

Also, not sure which "the other teams" you are referring to, but if you mean french and italian teams please don't!

If you mean Bayern (one of the few clubs that I still like when they have a team) then yes, I agree that they are excellent. But they need to re-build.

I actually wished to see Ajax against liverpool in this final. I think Ajax could have beaten liverpool to be fully honest. Sometimes football is so unfair.

As for origi, I don't like him, just like I don't like moura and many other one match / one season wonders.

Last but not least, I think Son Heung-Min is the biggest yellow Asian player I have ever seen. Not sure if he really enjoys playing for spurs, or just doesn't have offers from bigger clubs, but he should have played for a bigger club. He's way too good for the nuisances that play for spurs. Actually, spurs' performances over the last seasons have been the doing of 3 men, and 3 men only: son, pochettino, and kane. Everyone else... no difference between them and huddersfield, or brighton & hove.

Anyway, glad that it's over. This game has been atrocious to watch, almost as painful as the 2002-2003 final between Juve and my (then) beloved AC MILAN team. Football is not what it used to be when almighty Milan used to snow on every so-called big european club. I remember at one point during the UCL draws for the knock-out stages that one of Barca or Real's officials (sorry, don't remember exactly which of the 2, but one of them anyway) has facepalmed himself when his club has been drawn against the almighty Milan. THAT good my beloved AC Milan team has been back then (Kaka, Shevchenko, Maldini, Inzaghi, Nesta, Pirlo, Seedorf). And we're talking about a period when Real Madrid was fielding Zidane, Raul, Beckham, Figo, Casillas, Hierro, and Ronaldo (the real Ronaldo I mean).

Good ol' days that have been magical and will never come back

EDIT: I love the spurs' trophy cabinet. It suits them

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted June 01, 2019 11:22 PM
Edited by CountBezuhoff at 23:29, 01 Jun 2019.

I was talking about teams like Ajax (and a few English teams) that simply lack the mindset to win a competition like this. Liverpool have learned their lesson from last season, but still they were too scared to play all-out. Of the semi-finalists, Ajax were definitely my first pick, but they cracked when it mattered the most.

Football has really grown stale the last few years both internationally and domestically. Winning is more important than style and teams who employ more careful, "strategic" plays deliver more often. That has led to a surge in calm, low risk football which is a pain to watch.(ahem, France, ahem)

My chosen team (MU) has also been missing for some time now, so I dofeel your pain. Don't despair! Someday it'll work out! Surely...

The Count

PS: Yeah, if any of those three people leave, it's the end for Spurs. Especially Pochettino.
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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 01, 2019 11:40 PM

ah-ha! My bad for misreading your comment.

Man Utd is one of the few clubs I usually root for (Milan, Bayern, Man Utd... in this order), so we've got something in common.

OK, I have stopped liking Milan when the last legend (Seedorf) has left the club around 2011-2012. Ever since that's happened I have usually rooted for Man Utd and Bayern... until Sir Alex has left Man Utd, too, that is... which brings me to the evergreen question that I still haven't found an answer to: why has Fergie left MU out of the blue? Something not right about this, I'm telling you...

And the issue with the current MU team I think is they lack a manager with a strong hand like Fergie's. Nothing against Ole, but he's too soft for such crybabies and weak personalities. With all due respect to you and MU fans, but I don't think you can create performance with Lukkaku, Fred, Rashford, Lindgard, and Herrera. Pogba is good, but only if he has strong characters around him, and Rashford is good, too (I mean, he's got the right attitude), but he needs more experience and to improve his shot accuracy.

Actually, McTominay is a good player, just like Zinchenko of MC. I like them both, and I think they will become solid startups for their teams if they're not dragged down by the weaker players.

Anyway, the only way for MU to get back where they belong is either to bring a tough manager (although, that might not work in today's football where everyone is a pansy), either bring in strong characters (roy keane-type of players) - and not just 1, but 2 or 3 - either both of these options combined. Success and performance always start with great personalities first, and only after that with great footballers.

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blob2
blob2


Undefeatable Hero
Blob-Ohmos the Second
posted June 01, 2019 11:53 PM
Edited by blob2 at 23:58, 01 Jun 2019.

I'm feeling that the Liv-Tot was almost a mirror match of Klopps earlier CL tackle, back when he helmed Borusia Dortmund against Bayern Munchen. At that time, altough Borussia was seemingly beating Bayern on every field, it was Bayern who has shown cold calculation and won. This time Klopps team was the one who "waited out" their opponents.

Liverpool actually won the CL with their (already legendary) comeback against Barcelona.

Not a great fan of Liverpool, but I'm happy for Klopp, I like the guy, he deserved the cup. Although I think Liverpool was in it's prime back in 2018, they were strong enough to beat all the opposition this time around. Though lets face it, they did have a weaker opponent then Real in its last years top form. And didn't have Karius, lel

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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 01, 2019 11:57 PM

yeah, Klopp is one of the few reasons I rooted for liverpool, too, in this game.

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CountBezuhoff
CountBezuhoff


Supreme Hero
Nihil sub sole novum
posted June 01, 2019 11:58 PM

No offence taken, we are well aware of our team's weaknesses. And you are completely right about us needing a coach with a strong character. But we also need one with more executive power. Since Fergie not one of them has had complete control over transfers. We've pretty much been lost the last few windows.

IIRC sir Alex retired because of an illness or something. He was getting way too old as well. At some point you are just too tired to go on.

BTW I actually support the same teams you do, only in the reverse order.

The Count
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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 02, 2019 12:17 AM

OK, good choice of teams to support

Also, I'm not buying the illness thing. He looks too fresh and still capable of managing for this to be the reason of his departure. But, I'm not gonna insist on this topic... I just hope to see MU back on top, cause I'm feeling empty inside without watching quality football. Ajax would have brought back the joy of watching have they at least made the UCL final, but you may be right and they have probably chocked due to lack of experience, although... truth being told ajax is the most experienced club at european level (they've had several finals in the last 3 decades).

Oh well... we will see what the next season brings.

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Drakon-Deus
Drakon-Deus


Undefeatable Hero
Qapla'
posted June 02, 2019 08:06 AM

I was hoping Ajax make it to the CL final and in the end they didn't. Thus the final itself was of little interest to me.

Awaiting international games in June. The Romanian U21 team will be playing at the Euro in Italy and San Marino.

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monere
monere


Bad-mannered
Supreme Hero
posted June 02, 2019 06:08 PM

Drakon-Deus said:
I was hoping Ajax make it to the CL final and in the end they didn't. Thus the final itself was of little interest to me.

Awaiting international games in June. The Romanian U21 team will be playing at the Euro in Italy and San Marino.


as a Romanian I don't give a snow, man. Romanian sports are so corrupt that only who pays the coaches gets to play. I know 2 amazing young Romanian footballers (the type of players who can do magic on the pitch), but they have quit playing football because the coach hasn't give them enough playing time because they would not pay him. This is the present and the future of Romanian football, so I'm not interested in this c0cksuckery, and you shouldn't be, either. If you want to use your energy and time to do something constructive for this snow country then channel your energy towards praying for it and hoping for better times, but don't invest anything (time, money, or energy) into Romanian sports cause they're corrupt to the bone. Even our #1 WTA Simona Halep is forced to fix matches

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Drakon-Deus
Drakon-Deus


Undefeatable Hero
Qapla'
posted June 02, 2019 06:23 PM

Okay monere. But I "give a snow" about our football and I am free to post about it.

Besides, the champions league final was rather boring, don't you think?

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