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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: HC Big Brother:- Series One
Thread: HC Big Brother:- Series One This thread is 5 pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 · NEXT»
Cat
Cat


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Gonna Get Dirrty...
posted June 15, 2003 10:34 PM bonus applied.
Edited By: Hexa on 15 Jun 2003

HC Big Brother:- Series One

It's finally here, the ultimate in reality TV.  Yes, HC Big Brother, where you can watch your mismatched misfits 24/7 on HC Cable and vote them into eviction hell.  lets meet our housemates, before they enter the house.

Our contestants are Oldtimer, Bort, Sir Stiven, Kittenangel, The Gootch, Val, Djive and Soccerfever.

Reserve contestants are on standby in case of cheating or possible escape from the house.  This year, the house has two bedrooms with double and single beds an seductive blue lighting.  The living room/ kitchen is open plan and boasts modern furniture.  There is also a hot tub and a pool.

Treats, such as lesbians, monkeys and soy can be earned through tasks which must be studied for.

Good luck contestants, and remember:- BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU

Day 1-4:-  The cotestants arrive in the house.  There is some trouble when it is revealed that Bort has attempted to bring in his own soy.  it is conviscated and he is told that this may not happen again. The group settle in with a rousing version of "Kumbaya" and draw lots to see who gets which bed.  Each contestant is asked to give an initial impression of the other contestants at the end of the week.  Already individual personalities are begining to be shown, not least the conflict over what to ask for in the weekly ask.  Oldtimer wants lesbians whereas the majority of the others wish for soy.

Val has already made one attempt to escape, attempting to hide in the henhouse.  Soccerfever has thrown multiple tantrums due to people moving his piles of kitchen waste, which he cliams are in fact art.  Djive sees them as a health hazard and friction is already showing.  Oldtimer is getting annoyed with other housemates copying many of his mannerisms and is disgusted with the low number of votes for lesbians, chaining himself naked to the hot tub in protest.

Kittenangel and Sit Stiven appear to have an elemet of sexual tension growing as it is hate at first sight.  Kittenangel calls Stiven "unconstructive and obtuse" in the diary room.  Stiven accuses her of stealing his boxer shorts and using them as dusters.

Bort is perhaps the least communitcative housemate at this stage, perhaps lamenting the loss of his soy.  The Gootch has been caught breaking rules by brining a large polar bear into the house, and so he and Bort have already developed a common bond.

The house is already developing ditinct factions... who will stay in?  Who will be voted out?  And more importantly who will be ovted in?  Join us later for Big Brother Updated....

(apoligies to george orwell)

Edit by Hexa; Nice thread Cat .. lets get some cool stuff back in the tavern!@
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Diwethaf Gloau Sylw y Gymreag

http://aozos.com/phpBB2/index.php

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Sir_Stiven
Sir_Stiven


Honorable
Legendary Hero
banned
posted June 15, 2003 10:39 PM

ROFL

nice thread, although i would like some more chics in or i will go AWOL

kinda funny though, i had an idea similiar to this.

Will most likely start a thread about it once this one is dying out.

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bort
bort


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
posted June 15, 2003 10:41 PM

Bort creates great confusion among viewers as well as among the other contestants by repeatedly voting to eliminate Chester A. Arthur from the house.
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Sir_Stiven
Sir_Stiven


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Legendary Hero
banned
posted June 15, 2003 10:43 PM

*starts bashing his knife and fork in the kitchen table screaming "we want more girls, we want more girls" *

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Djive
Djive


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Zapper of Toads
posted June 15, 2003 11:20 PM
Edited By: Djive on 15 Jun 2003

Djive has finally found some constructive use of soccerfever's kitchen waste using it for an exotic charming perfume, combined with some other err... unmentionable materials just outside the house.

Sir Stiven has tactlessly acquired a lot of garlic and is wearing a necklace of garlic to ward off what he calls the witches in the house. He wards away everyone since the others refuse to go within five paces of him due to the heavy garlic scent. Djive promptly finds a use for her exotic perfume, both for herself and other takers are not lacking.

Djive looks at Sit Stiven with disdain. She thinks to herself: "Crying for more girls and then wear a garlic necklace to scare away the ones that are here."

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Saruman
Saruman


Famous Hero
On academic leave
posted June 16, 2003 12:15 AM

Oh, just great. The plague of reality TV has infected the Tavern.
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Thank god I'm an atheist.

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Sir_Stiven
Sir_Stiven


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Legendary Hero
banned
posted June 16, 2003 02:39 AM
Edited By: Sir_Stiven on 15 Jun 2003

*explains to Djive that having the garlic neclace was the only way to get kitten to stay away from him. Also it keeps the toad smell from you away..so basically its a double gain*

Just to bad that kitten started to follow gootchie boy instead so he tried to take my garlic neclace and then it broke down

So now we are working on this "anti kitten" system in one of the bedrooms to try and get some privacy from her.

To bad though, because it seems kitten is on borts tail now. I heard him cry about it in the confession room earlier...

But i still want some hot chics in though.... and please atleast get us some girls that doesnt smell like they spent their last 20 years in a swamp dating frogs or trying to steal my boxers


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bort
bort


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Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
posted June 16, 2003 03:47 AM

Bort becomes a big hit with viewers by delivering 3 hour improptu lectures on yak farming.
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Kittenangel
Kittenangel


Supreme Hero
Lee's wifey
posted June 16, 2003 04:41 AM

Kitten attempts to hit Stiven in the eye with a steak knife
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Never wear anything that panics
the cat.

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Oldtimer
Oldtimer


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Supreme Hero
Please leave a message after..
posted June 16, 2003 07:34 AM
Edited By: Oldtimer on 16 Jun 2003

***CONFESSIONAL***

Wow, what a group!

I think I have a good position here, the Guys see me as some sort of spiritual leader and the girls see me as a protective father type.  I believe I will continue to try and stay in the good graces of both groups.  With the Gootch flexing and showing of his muscles, and bort sitting in the corner making his "art" with the Peanut Butter. The attention has not shifted towards me and my off color comments on the natural beauty of hot girl on girl action.

But considering that there are only two chicks here the hot lesbo action may not materialize,(and I think I may have discovered something quite disturbing about the very pretty Djive, something that if it comes out will rock the House.)

I think that the young hothead Soccerfever has drawn the ire of both groups, I think he may be trying to ally himself with SirStiven to divert attention but I don't think the Heavenly Kittycat is buying any of it.
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<PLEASE DO NOT WAKE THE OLD MAN!>

"Zzzz...Zzzz...Zzzz..."

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Sir_Stiven
Sir_Stiven


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Legendary Hero
banned
posted June 16, 2003 12:03 PM

making his first confession


*looks in the camera*

Heya bro...

These has been some very...hmmmm..."interesting days", as things seem though most people here are just doing there own buisness so far. Except for kitten then who tries to take advantage that she is the only girl who doesnt smell sewer system.

And to be honest about it the situation is getting kinda boring so i have a few suggestions...

First bring in some more girls, hot ones preferd.
Then throw in lotsa liqour and weŽll have a great "get to know each other party"... until the day after when we wont remember any of it then...

hmmm...well back to girls thing, it seems more and more of us are getting desperate.

Before i went in here i saw bort drawing breasts with his peanut butter art... Valery was sitting wondering if his msg forum really is this dead when it comes to girls and well... i think this weird little dude soccerfeva has started hitting on me...

So pleeeease bro, get some more girls here and youŽll get some more action

Well gotta go now... gootchie boy is banking on the door saying he needs a place to hide from kitten again...

Until we meet again...

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bort
bort


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
posted June 16, 2003 01:14 PM

Quote:
and bort sitting in the corner making his "art" with the Peanut Butter.


THAT'S BETWEEN ME, THE DOG AND THE HORRIFIED VIEWING PUBLIC!
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Kittenangel
Kittenangel


Supreme Hero
Lee's wifey
posted June 16, 2003 04:05 PM

*looks at stiven in confusion*
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Never wear anything that panics
the cat.

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Sir_Stiven
Sir_Stiven


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Legendary Hero
banned
posted June 16, 2003 04:09 PM

*tells kitten that gootchie boy is in confession room and that she should be looking for him instead, then he runs to hide under his bed*

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Kittenangel
Kittenangel


Supreme Hero
Lee's wifey
posted June 16, 2003 04:23 PM
Edited By: Kittenangel on 16 Jun 2003

*looks around for stiven notices he is no where to be found and uses his bed for a potty*

CONFESSION......

I feel so left out in this group, no one really seems to understand me here. Stiven has his strange sex acts with himself and it just grosses me out.

Oldtimer is truely the only sain one in the bunch. So i think to save myself from mental damage I will stay in my room and away from all.

I was going through Stivens things and found a picture of him at work that just scared me!



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Never wear anything that panics
the cat.

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Oldtimer
Oldtimer


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Please leave a message after..
posted June 16, 2003 08:44 PM

***CONFESSIONAL***

Since there are cameras all over the house, no need to tell you what happened last night.  But in my defence I believe that Kittenangel felt isolated and alone and she neede some comforting.  I promised her that I would tell you all that nothing happened, so I will.  Nothing Happened, twice.

I believe that Nothing Will Happen tonight too.
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<PLEASE DO NOT WAKE THE OLD MAN!>

"Zzzz...Zzzz...Zzzz..."

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The_Gootch
The_Gootch


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Kneel Before Me Sons of HC!!
posted June 17, 2003 01:05 AM
Edited By: The_Gootch on 16 Jun 2003

While lounging on the sofa...flipping channels

"How the hell--after all this time--did I finally get stuck in one of these?"
<Start muttering to myself>

"A whiny swede...a wimpy romantic...a friggin career teacher's assistant...McKittenAngel...some horndog old man going through a mid-life crisis...Ms. gender-bender herself...and you soccerfeva."
<Hears garbled muffling sounds>

"Yeah, I'm talking to you.  Tell me kid...why did Lich_King and Kuma drag your sorry butt here?  And why, oh why, did they see fit to shove that ball gag into your mouth?  Hmmm?  I can't hear you!!"
<Soccerfeva growls>

"Speak up!  Didn't your mother tell you it wasn't polite to talk with your mouth full?  Hah!  You've never sounded better!  I'm only mildly curious as to how you're going to be able to eat with that thing in."
<Flips some more channels>

"Whoo-hoo!  WWE is on tonight!  Yeah baby!  You know Soccerfeva.  Don't respond, just nod."
"You know Soccerfeva...that polar bear was a ruse.  I figured that if they went for the polar bear, they wouldn't see the fifth of hooch that was shoved into my crotch.  Yeah, yeah...I know I'm well-endowed.  Don't stare.  I'm not that well-endowed though."
<Pulls out the bottle of Early Times from under the sofa pillow>

"I'd offer you a shot...but I don't have a straw!  Bwhahaha!"
<Takes a long swig, gets an evil grin on his face and gets a little closer to Soccerfeva, whispering>

"Anybody ever tell you...'Boy, you've got yerself a pretty mouf'!"
<Turns back to the television screen>

"I'm gonna enjoy this too much."


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bort
bort


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Discarded foreskin of morality
posted June 17, 2003 02:03 AM
Edited By: bort on 16 Jun 2003

Quote:

"A whiny swede...a wimpy romantic...a friggin career teacher's assistant...McKittenAngel...some horndog old man going through a mid-life crisis...Ms. gender-bender herself...and you soccerfeva."
<Hears garbled muffling sounds>



After finally figuring out which one I am, I should say that 1. I resent the implication that I have a career  2.  I am not a teaching assistant and 3.  any teachers that I was paid to assist in the past were, in fact not assisted and probably would have had an easier time at it if I had been allowed to pursue my lifelong dream of being a bikini waxer, but for some reason, women get upset when you run up to them carrying a bubbling bucket of hot goo and ask if they're sick and tired of their short and curlies yet.

I do, however, appreciate being acknowledged for my legendary friggin' abilities.
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Kittenangel
Kittenangel


Supreme Hero
Lee's wifey
posted June 17, 2003 05:34 AM

*looks at gootch with confusion on her face and looks to oldtimer* WTF did he just say?!
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Never wear anything that panics
the cat.

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Oldtimer
Oldtimer


Honorable
Supreme Hero
Please leave a message after..
posted June 17, 2003 06:53 AM

Well Darlin' it seems that poor bort has been cut to the quick, as he sees his whole life encapsulated in ten syllables, while are man Gootch admires the pleasant seeming features of young soccerfeva's mouth and imagines himself doing things, that we shall not speak of, to it.

If you're still curious I might be persuaded in showing you what he means.
____________
<PLEASE DO NOT WAKE THE OLD MAN!>

"Zzzz...Zzzz...Zzzz..."

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