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Heroes Community > Other Side of the Monitor > Thread: What is Love?
Thread: What is Love? This Popular Thread is 225 pages long: 1 30 60 90 120 150 180 ... 204 205 206 207 208 ... 210 225 · «PREV / NEXT»
Stevie
Stevie


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 04:49 PM

... It think I'm gonna be sick. Need a basket asap.

Your "help him come to terms with his sexuality" is an euphemistic way of saying you wanna pressure him into homosexuality. Just finish your high school and leave other people alone.

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xerox
xerox


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 05:33 PM
Edited by xerox at 17:35, 08 Jun 2014.

No, I want him to be himself. Assure him that he doesn't need to conform to any labels but himself.
____________
Over himself, over his own
body and
mind, the individual is
sovereign.
- John Stuart Mill

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Fauch
Fauch


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 06:00 PM

Stevie said:
... It think I'm gonna be sick. Need a basket asap.



I think I need one too

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mvassilev
mvassilev


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 06:55 PM

What does your boyfriend think of your interactions with your classmate?
____________
Eccentric Opinion

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Adrius
Adrius


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Stand and fight!
posted June 08, 2014 07:18 PM

^ primary question right there.
____________

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DagothGares
DagothGares


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
posted June 08, 2014 07:19 PM

Sounds to me like the guy in your story isn't 100% sure about his deal, xerox. I guess what you need to figure out is what your current boyfriend thinks about your classmate and what your classmate thinks about your boyfriend. Nothing more I can say.

I think the aversion some members feel comes from the fact your classmate doesn't sound entirely sure of his deal. Don't mind that. Let the guy figure out what he wants. Nothing about what you said implied coercion.

Be wary of hurtful things happening as always, but I'm sure you'll be right as rain.
____________
If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.

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Stevie
Stevie


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 07:33 PM

My aversion comes from seeing all this disturbing thing being posted here in the first place. Xerox wanting 3 some action with his boyfriend and his insecure high school colleague. Then you see this...





And you get the picture. I ain't joking, I literally felt my stomach turn. Goddamn I can't enjoy my dinner now

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Adrius
Adrius


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Stand and fight!
posted June 08, 2014 07:43 PM

If anything's distasteful in here in here it's your attitude.
____________

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Stevie
Stevie


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 07:56 PM

This affected me enough to ruin my meal. And excuse me for having an opinion. I see that your preached tolerance is actually bullsnow altogether.

You know what, snow it. I ain't doing this again.

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xerox
xerox


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 08:02 PM

I think you should spend less time fantasizing about random people on the internet.

Anyway, first of all, it isn't entirely correct to say I have a "boyfriend" (it's just easier to describe him like that here). We have never initiated a formal relationship, rarely speak of each other in such terms, but we enjoy each other's company and share a lot of mutual interests. That's why I have a hard time feeling a need to tell him these things, but if he asks something, I won't lie.

We (other people at the party) joked a bit about that I took advantage of my classmate when he was drunk, but there was implicit consent and he was thankfull of me  keeping him company. This summer, we're planning to visit my bf so I looken forward to how this will unfold when its the three of us, at the same spot, at the same time.
____________
Over himself, over his own
body and
mind, the individual is
sovereign.
- John Stuart Mill

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Fauch
Fauch


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 08:40 PM

isn't "drunk" the key word of this whole story?

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mvassilev
mvassilev


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 08, 2014 09:59 PM

Your boyfriend-whom-you-don't-call-a-boyfriend may still have some opinion about this that you'd want to take into account. My advice is to talk to him first.
____________
Eccentric Opinion

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Ebonheart
Ebonheart


Famous Hero
Rush the rush
posted June 08, 2014 11:19 PM

Fauch said:
isn't "drunk" the key word of this whole story?


I think the key word here would be "High" or "Hyped".

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xerox
xerox


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 09, 2014 12:08 AM

okay I've realized im in love with two people
____________
Over himself, over his own
body and
mind, the individual is
sovereign.
- John Stuart Mill

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Lexxan
Lexxan


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Unimpressed by your logic
posted June 09, 2014 12:57 AM

Adrius said:
If anything's distasteful in here in here it's your attitude.


X
____________
Coincidence? I think not!!!!

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fred79
fred79


Disgraceful
Undefeatable Hero
posted June 09, 2014 04:20 AM

i don't see why stevie's the only bad guy here. xerox has a sig saying he hates hetero people. even if that was a joke, it's against the C.O.C.(not that i give a ****.) you guys can't point fingers at one, and not the other, merely because it would display your views of "tolerance". that's a little hypocritical, if you ask me.

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Vindicator
Vindicator


Supreme Hero
Right Back Extraordinaire
posted June 09, 2014 05:19 AM

Well he's clearly joking, while Stevie isn't... Pretty big difference...

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Corribus
Corribus

Hero of Order
The Abyss Staring Back at You
posted June 09, 2014 06:43 AM

Back on topic, please.
____________
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later. -Mitch Hedberg

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meroe
meroe


Supreme Hero
Basically Smurfette
posted June 09, 2014 07:27 PM

xerox said:
I'm sort of in the middle of a polyamorous love triangle now.

I'm approaching the end of high school. During these three years, I've been kinda interested in one of my classmates, who often acts outside of hetero norms. He has no problem walking around naked in front of everybody when drunk, I've kissed him more times than anyone else in my life lol. It's obvious that he's not really sure of his sexuality. Sometimes, he's claimed that he's bisexual, sometimes that he's heterosexual but relates to "individuals" and not gender (yeah, I'm sort of responsible for planting that liberal propaganda in his head).  He's also obviously curious about a lot of "gay culture" things, especially in comparison to "straight culture" (like how it's probably easier to just casually sleep with a gay guy than a girl).

I care about him and have started to show that a whole lot more these last weeks. When he gets really, really drunk, I follow him home so that he gets there safely. He really appreciated that. Yesterday, we were at a home party at a rural household, and I, again, took care of him when he had drank to much. We ended up placing him on the floor in a sort of cottage, so he could sleep some. There was no heating though, and he was shaking a lot from the cold, so well, we ended up sort of spooning each other to keep ourselves warm. We had no pillows, no blankets, no heating, only each other. He ended up saying he'd tell his parents that he was bisexual, and that he thought I was sort of cute.

This guy knows my bf from when they were young, and we usually drink with each other when my bfs in town (he lives elsewhere). My classmate is fully supportive of our relationship. Now I'm sort of struggling with how to deal with the situation. You probably know by now that I don't find monogamy to be very appealing, but perhaps it's to optimistic of me to think that I can have both of them. I really don't want to in any way damage the relation between us three.

I'm also thinking about what I can do to make my classmate come to terms with his sexuality. I want to help him get out of the position where he's heterosexual to everybody else (even though people know and accept that he has bi tendencies), but bisexual to me.  I want him to know that there's absolutely no need for him to identify as gay or part of that "culture", where he (and I) don't really approve of the feminine aspects. I think that might be what's holding him back. I want him to know that there's no need for him at all to live as, and be labelled as, a feminine gay stereotype or anything like that.


It might be a good idea for your school friend to speak to someone else about his identity and sexuality/feelings, rather than you.  Because ultimately you have your own agenda here = your desires and wants, which might not actually be what he needs or wants.  However, speaking to someone outside of your little triangle, may help him work out things for himself rather than be pressurized by others.

I really don't think you are the one to help him discover his sexuality.  If he discovers he is in fact bi or even homosexual, I am sure he will seek you out as you two have a connection.  But if he really is a friend of your's, you will give him the space his needs to find counsel elsewhere with someone not invested in the relationship as you are.

Also you need to remember that many heterosexual people can develop very strong emotional relationships with homosexual people akin, beyond best friends etc.  Sometimes  sex is just not on the books.  
____________
Meroe is definetely out, sweet
as she sounds sometimes, she'd
definetely castrate you with a
rusted razror and forcefeed
your genitals to you in a
blink of an eye - Kipshasz

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Minion
Minion


Legendary Hero
posted June 09, 2014 08:23 PM

+ 100 to Meroe.

Even heterosexuals form strong bonds with same sex people. You can't know what he is. Maybe he likes you as a person and therefore would even want to be bisexual on some level.

If Sweden is at all like Finland, it is veeeery common for friends to kiss each other when drunk. That means absolutely nothing at all.

Furthermore I won't give any advice hearing only your side of the story, when it might be highly your interpretation of things and not how he feels.

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